“You Want to Stand There and Attack Me?” RFK Jr Argues With Local Starbucks Employee About “Invasive Question”on What RFK Jr Would Like to Drink

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WASHINGTON — The Starbucks on Third Street near HHS headquarters found itself in an imbroglio with Health and Human Services (HHS) Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr. after the secretary claimed an employee of the chain “assaulted and attacked” his character by asking “distracting and totally unacceptable” questions about what he would like to order.

“I am trying to make sure we don’t repeat the mistakes from the pandemic, and these fucking assholes want to distract us by asking me what I would like to order,” a visibly irate Kennedy said in a video posted to the official HHS X account. “That’s the type of intrusive question that is how the lamestream media tries to silence the Constitution.”

According to footage obtained by The Weekly Needle, RFK Jr. waited in line to order at the Third Street location. When asked what he would like to order, Kennedy began yelling, “Stop blaming me for misinformation that you and Fauci spewed,” and “You are trying to shut down the Constitution by saying I don’t know what the fuck I’m talking about.”

“What are you, some kind of ‘coffee expert’? You think you’re better than me, Dana Bash?” Kennedy demanded, before claiming that the Starbucks employee was, in fact, Dana Bash.

“I know you are Dana Bash in disguise, you fucking asshole,” he stated.

Speaking to reporters after the incident, the Starbucks employee whom RFK Jr. accused of being Dana Bash confirmed that he is not Dana Bash.

“I am not Dana Bash,” said Ethan Choi, the Starbucks employee RFK Jr. accused of being Dana Bash.

The incident forced Starbucks headquarters to issue a public statement saying that while the company was “disappointed by the events that unfolded,” it had “incontrovertible proof” that Ethan Choi “definitely is not Dana Bash.”

However, Starbucks said the incident had “forced the franchise, regrettably,” to require Ethan Choi to legally change his name to Dana Bash “to keep things on the up and up.”