You're Not Eating For Two

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🫶🏼 Emmalee

There’s a narrative circulating, especially in holistic and ancestral spaces, that pregnancy is a time to let go.

To eat more. To rest more. To gain more.

And while some of that is true… somewhere along the way, we lost the nuance.

What began as a rebellion against restriction has quietly turned into a different kind of imbalance… one where excess is not only normalized, but praised.

Where gaining significant amounts of weight is framed as “supporting your body.”
Where appetite is treated as the only compass.
Where “nourishment” becomes indistinguishable from overconsumption.

And where women are told, explicitly or not:

“You’re eating for two.”

You’re actually not.

Your body during pregnancy is incredibly intelligent.

It knows how to grow a baby.
It knows how to expand blood volume.
It knows how to build a placenta, store nutrients, and prepare for birth.

But it’s also shaped by your inputs.

It responds to:

• your environment

• your habits

• your intake

• your movement

• your awareness

And when we remove all structure, all intention, all discernment and replace it with “just trust your body,” we’re not honoring its intelligence.

We’re abandoning our responsibility to work with it.

Pregnancy weight gain is not random. It is not arbitrary. And it is not all body fat.

It’s actually not even mostly body fat (or shouldn’t be).

On average, a healthy full-term pregnancy includes:

• baby: ~7–8 lbs

• placenta: ~1.5–2 lbs

• amniotic fluid: ~2 lbs

• increased blood volume: ~3–4 lbs

• uterus growth: ~2 lbs

• breast tissue: ~1–3 lbs

• maternal fat stores: ~5–9 lbs

This brings most healthy pregnancies into a ~25–35 lb range for women starting at a healthy weight. Not 60 lbs. Not 80 lbs. 25-35 lbs on average.

These numbers are not arbitrary. They’re based on what your body actually has to build and support. They’re not pulled out of thin air.

And not because your body is “failing” if you exceed that, but because beyond a certain point, the weight is no longer supporting the pregnancy… it’s simply accumulating.

Despite what’s often shared online (and parroted by well-meaning people about “eating for two”) pregnancy does not require a massive increase in calories.

According to established guidelines:

• First trimester: no additional calories needed (shocking to most people)

• Second trimester: ~340 extra calories/day

• Third trimester: ~450 extra calories/day

That’s not “double your intake.” It’s not even close.

That’s:

• a bowl of yogurt with fruit

• a couple eggs and toast

• a balanced snack

And that’s it.

Energy needs increase gradually, not explosively.

“Eat whatever you want. You’re growing a baby!”

No.

Pregnancy is not a free pass for disconnection.

It is not a time to abandon awareness of what you’re consuming, how much you’re consuming, or how your body is responding.

If anything, it is the most important time to be intentional.

Because:

• your blood sugar regulation matters

• your nutrient density matters

• your inflammation levels matter

• your energy levels matter

• your recovery will matter

And excess intake, yes, even of “healthy” foods, can work against all of that.

There’s a belief in some spaces that if food is “clean,” “ancestral,” or “nutrient-dense”… it can be eaten without limit. Unfortunately, that’s just not the case.

Your body cares deeply about nutrient density, but is also cares about:

• total intake

• metabolic demand

• hormonal response

• energy balance

You can absolutely over-consume:

• nutrient-dense foods

• whole foods

• “healing” foods

And when you do, the outcome is the same:

Excess storage.
Decreased energy.
Increased inflammation.
Greater strain on your system.

This is the part that’s often skipped or overlooked because no one really wants to talk about it:

Weight gain during pregnancy is often treated as harmless or benign.
But physiologically, excess fat gain is not neutral.

Adipose tissue is not just stored energy.

It is an active endocrine organ, meaning it produces hormones, inflammatory signals, and metabolic messengers that directly influence both maternal and fetal environments.

So when fat gain exceeds what the body actually needs, it doesn’t just sit there. It actively changes the conditions your body is operating in.

1. Increased Insulin Resistance and Blood Sugar Dysregulation
   Pregnancy already creates a natural state of insulin resistance. This is normal and helps ensure a steady supply of glucose to the baby.

   But excess fat mass amplifies this effect.

   More adipose tissue → greater insulin resistance → higher circulating glucose levels.

   This increases the risk of:

   • gestational diabetes (GDM)

   • excess fetal growth (macrosomia)

   • blood sugar instability for both mother and baby

   And even outside of a GDM diagnosis, elevated blood sugar levels can still:

   • increase oxidative stress

   • impact placental function

   • influence fetal metabolic programming

2. Chronic Low-Grade Inflammation
   Adipose tissue releases inflammatory cytokines such as:

   • TNF-α

   • IL-6

   When fat mass increases beyond what the body needs, these inflammatory signals rise.

   Pregnancy is meant to be a carefully regulated inflammatory state, not excessively high, not excessively low.

   Excess inflammation is associated with:

   • increased risk of preeclampsia

   • impaired placental blood flow

   • higher levels of systemic stress on the body

3. Hormonal Disruption
   Fat tissue also plays a role in hormone regulation, particularly estrogen.

   Excess adiposity can:

   • alter estrogen signaling

   • impact leptin (satiety hormone) signaling

   • disrupt appetite regulation and energy balance

   This can create a feedback loop where:

   • hunger cues become less reliable

   • energy regulation becomes less stable

   • further excess gain becomes easier

4. Increased Cardiovascular Strain
   Pregnancy already increases:

   • blood volume

   • cardiac output

   • circulatory demand

   Excess weight adds additional strain to this system.

   This can contribute to:

   • elevated blood pressure

   • increased risk of hypertensive disorders

   • greater physical fatigue and reduced capacity for movement

5. Labor, Delivery, and Recovery Implications

   Higher levels of excess weight gain are associated with:

   • longer labor durations

   • increased likelihood of interventions (including C-section)

   • more difficult postpartum recovery

   From a mechanical standpoint:

   • more weight = more strain on joints, tissues, and movement patterns

   From a metabolic standpoint:

   • greater fat accumulation = more to mobilize postpartum

   And while weight loss is not the goal immediately after birth, the reality is:
   Recovery is often more physically and metabolically demanding when excess fat stores are significantly higher than necessary.

6. Long-Term Metabolic Programming for Baby
   This is one of the most overlooked (and difficult to discuss) pieces.

   The intrauterine environment helps shape the baby’s future metabolic health.

   Excess maternal glucose, insulin, and inflammatory signals can influence:

   • fat storage tendencies

   • insulin sensitivity

   • long-term risk for metabolic conditions

   This is not deterministic, but it is influential.

This isn’t about fear. It’s about awareness.

None of this means:

• your body is “doing something wrong”

• you need to restrict or micromanage every bite

• you should feel anxious about weight gain

But it does mean:
Excess fat gain is not just cosmetic. It is not just “extra cushioning.”

It has real physiological effects, on you and your baby.

The goal isn’t less weight, it’s appropriate weight.
What your body actually needs. Not more, not less.

In my own (Emmalee’s) first two pregnancies, I gained what would be considered a healthy amount of weight for my frame.

• 5’2”

• Started the first pregnancy at 119 lbs (54kg) and the second pregnancy at 124 lbs (56kg)

• Gained ~26–30 lbs (11.7-13.6kg)

• Delivered 8 lb 6 oz (3.9kg) and 9 lb 6 oz (4.2kg) babies

I stayed active:

• walking

• hiking

• biking

• strength training

And I consistently had strong energy levels, even late into pregnancy.

People commented on it often, and I don’t believe that was random.

I believe it was directly tied to staying within a range that supported my body, without overwhelming it.

After my second pregnancy, I swung in the opposite direction.

I ate a lot. Constantly. Generously.

While the foods themselves were nourishing… the quantity was not aligned.

And I felt it.

My body felt foreign.
My energy was low.
My stress was high.
Recovery felt harder, not easier.

This is something we don’t talk about enough:
Over-nourishment is still dysregulating.

Not in the same way as restriction, but in a way that still creates friction in the body.

When weight gain stays within a range that aligns with your body:

• movement feels easier

• energy stays more stable

• blood sugar is more regulated

• inflammation is lower

• recovery is often smoother

This isn’t about aesthetics.

It’s about how you feel living inside your body, during pregnancy and after.

Weight gain recommendations during pregnancy are not one-size-fits-all, and they were never meant to be.

Your starting body composition directly influences:

• how much stored energy you already have available

• how your body regulates blood sugar

• how much additional tissue is actually necessary to support a healthy pregnancy

This is why evidence-based guidelines adjust weight gain ranges based on pre-pregnancy BMI. (Yes, we believe and acknowledge that there are limitations to BMI, but in general these are realistic and helpful estimations.)

According to the Institute of Medicine (IOM):

• underweight (BMI <18.5): ~28–40 lbs

• normal weight (BMI 18.5–24.9): ~25–35 lbs

• overweight (BMI 25–29.9): ~15–25 lbs

• obese (BMI ≥30): ~11–20 lbs

These ranges are not arbitrary.

They reflect the reality that pregnancy requires a specific amount of tissue growth, not unlimited accumulation.

As we discussed earlier, a significant portion of pregnancy weight is accounted for by the baby, the placenta, fluid, blood volume, and uterine growth.

These components are relatively consistent across pregnancies.

What varies most is maternal fat gain, and this is where starting weight matters.

Your body will typically:

• store a modest amount of fat (~5–9 lbs)

• use that fat as an energy reserve for later pregnancy and breastfeeding

• maintain metabolic flexibility

In this context, gaining ~25–35 lbs often reflects:

• appropriate tissue growth

• appropriate energy storage

• a well-supported pregnancy

In this case, the body:

• has fewer reserves

• may require greater fat accumulation

• benefits from a higher range of weight gain

Here, increased intake and weight gain are protective, not excessive.

In the case of beginning pregnancy underweight, intake often needs to increase earlier, sometimes immediately in the first trimester.

General guidelines suggest, as we’ve discussed, no additional calories in the first trimester, and a modest increases in the second and third.

But these recommendations assume sufficient pre-pregnancy reserves. If you are underweight, that assumption doesn’t apply.

In many cases, intake should increase:

• ~200–400+ calories above baseline even in the first trimester

• ~300–500+ calories above baseline in the second trimester

• ~400–700+ calories above baseline in the third trimester

This isn’t excessive. It’s compensating for a lower starting point.

It’s also worth noting that hunger cues may not immediately reflect this need. So in some cases, you may need to eat slightly beyond what feels intuitive, especially early on. Not forcefully, but intentionally.

Your body already has excess energy stores, which means:

• less additional fat storage is required

• your body can draw from existing reserves

• excessive additional gain becomes more likely to disrupt metabolic balance

Your body is capable of:

• mobilizing stored fat

• breaking down triglycerides

• and using that energy to help support the pregnancy

This is a normal, physiological process. And from a physiological standpoint, adding new fat mass on top of existing stores increases:

• insulin resistance

• inflammatory signaling

• hormonal dysregulation

Which is why, in this context, the goal is not to continually add more fuel, but to allow your body to utilize what it already has, while still supporting the pregnancy with adequate, intentional intake.

This is why recommended gain is lower. Not to restrict the body, but to avoid compounding unnecessary metabolic strain.

Lower recommended weight gain for higher starting weights is often interpreted as:

• “eat less”

• “restrict”

• “control weight gain at all costs”

That’s not the goal. The goal is alignment with physiology.

Because gaining well beyond what your body actually needs, regardless of starting weight, does not improve outcomes. It increases strain.

Pregnancy is not a time to become sedentary unless truly medically necessary.

Staying active:

• supports circulation

• improves insulin sensitivity

• reduces excessive weight gain

• helps maintain strength for birth and postpartum

And while standard recommendations are often very conservative, many women can safely do far more when properly supported.

What we recommend, both from research and lived experience:

• eat intentionally, not impulsively

• prioritize nutrient density and appropriate quantity

• consider tracking periodically (not obsessively) to stay aware

• support your protein and micronutrient intake

• stay active in ways that feel good and sustainable

• adjust based on your body’s needs

You don’t need to restrict.
You don’t need to fear food.
You don’t need to chase perfection.

But you also don’t need to abandon awareness in the name of “trust.”

True trust looks like:

• listening and responding

• nourishing and discerning

• supporting and guiding

It’s a time to be more deeply connected than ever before.

And that means recognizing and honoring the reality:

You’re not eating for two.
Your nourishing one body (yours) so it can grow another.

And how you care for that body matters deeply.

Weight gain during pregnancy is one of those topics where almost every woman has a story.

What she was told. What she experienced.
What she wishes she had done differently.

And so much of it is shaped by messaging that’s either:

• overly restrictive

• completely unstructured

There’s rarely space for something in the middle.

So we’d love to hear from you…

• Were you told to “eat for two”?

• Did you feel in control of your intake during pregnancy… or disconnected from it?

• Did your weight gain support how you felt, or work against you?

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