Discernment Is Free and Still Hard to Get

Discernment is a branding and marketing tool that outshines every other branding and marketing tool we talk about. It doesn’t cost a dollar, BUT it’s so much harder to garner and hone within yourself. It takes discipline, restraint, and constant reevaluation, and if you’re interested in building a world (not just a brand, an actual world), this is going to be your most important skill!!

The proper definition of discernment is the ability to judge well, see what’s hidden, and make smart choices. Separating truth from lies, or the best option from a good one.

My definition is a little more specific: knowing what is for you, and more importantly, what is not for you. Knowing when to say no to an opportunity. Knowing when not to hop on the bandwagon. And knowing yourself well enough that you don’t feel the fear when you practice that restraint.

One of the easiest examples of this, and something literally anyone can relate to, founder or not, marketer or not, business or personal, is viral TikTok and IG trends. Lately the “kinda chic” carousel has been circulating everywhere, and I have no problem with the format itself (our overuse and obsession with the word chic, and the way we love telling people what is and isn’t chic in huge capital letters, is a conversation for another time). But I think it’s moments exactly like this one where people, brands, and marketers can tell whether they should hop on a trend or sit it out.

It’s tempting to want to go viral, obviously. If you’re the social media girl at a company and your boss is tracking your views and engagement week over week, it’s tempting to chase every single viral thing that comes across your FYP. But that’s exhausting, and somewhere in the chasing, you lose the plot.

I’m not saying brands shouldn’t ever opt into a viral moment or be part of the cultural conversation. I’m saying the pause matters so much. Pause, think, and decide whether it actually fits into the world you’re trying to build, the why behind you showing up on the platform in the first place, and whether it’s the message you actually want to send.

Same goes for partnerships. Walmart wants to collab with your startup, and sure, they don’t meet your brand standard, but the reach and the revenue feel tempting anyway. This happens all day, every day, to every individual and every business. But I truly believe that when we say no to what isn’t aligned, the universe rewards you tenfold.

Lastly, and maybe most importantly, I want to talk about this on a personal level. When you come across a TikTok about how intermittent fasting changed someone’s entire life, or how your favorite food has caused an allergic reaction for someone else, it is beyond crucial that you, as a whole human being, know how to say “not for me” and scroll away. Instead of flipping your life upside down over it. Or, more commonly, leaving some disagreeable comment about it. Not everything is for you!!!!!! Learn that, be able to diagnose it in real time, and you get to walk through life with a little more ease.

Discernment, in my eyes, is also the key factor in taste. Anyone can have taste without discernment, they just have to open Pinterest, make a board, and copy and paste it. It takes real refinement, and knowing which trends not to chase, to actually build a personal style and taste that’s yours.

Owning a business is a million decisions a day. But so is personal life now, with how saturated our feeds are, the constant noise, the constant opinions coming at us from every angle. Let’s all practice this skill a little more. Hone it.