Alaska

When you look at Alaska, it’s obvious that for national security reasons, it should be part of Canada. It should be our eleventh province.

In his own words, Donald Trump said, "Somebody drew that line many years ago like with a ruler, just a straight line right across the top of the country."

After all, we’ve always been joined at the shoulder, and you should be honored to become our newest Province. Just imagine the advantages; eventually you would be included in our free healthcare system. No more going bankrupt because you had a baby. No more being forced to have your rapist’s baby or bleeding out in some shabby hospital parking lot while doctors decide which is more important - your life or their license to practice medicine.

Hell, you can even own a gun in Canada if you follow our rules and regulations. They are quite strict rules, naturally, because we won’t have lunatics shooting everything that moves or everyone who disagrees with our political views.

Please note that I am not a politician, nor do I have any power to decide such things. I’m just a simple retired old Canadian who remembers when we were friends and the world was a different place.

So think about it.
…but don’t take too long. I’m not sure how long we all have in this world of good or Trump.

-Stephen Briggs.