Inner Teenager Healing

Prefer to listen? Audio below.

Fun fact: I turned 17 in Barcelona, Spain.

I was in Europe for the entire month of July in 1999 on an educational trip.
And when our time in Spain came to an end, I didn’t want to leave.

I was invited on the trip based on the merit of being fluent in Spanish.

A language I learned as a toddler, maintained well enough through my childhood and excelled in by the time I was a teenager.

This felt like a superpower growing up, but to actually be in the country of this beautiful language, changed everything about me.

I fell in love with the culture immediately.
The pace. The feeling. The way life was lived.

It was foreign, yes, but it was also deeply familiar.
There was something about being there that just made sense to me.

I didn’t know this way of life was available before this trip, so I couldn’t stop thinking about it after.

Another fun fact: The night before we left Spain, I told my roommate that if I wasn’t on the bus in the morning, to not worry about me.

I was joking.
I didn’t stay.

But there was a part of me that didn’t want to go back to America either…
So in that moment I made a promise to myself that I would come back one day. To live.

And I kept that promise 26 years later.

Honestly, being here again feels familiar in a way I can’t fully explain.

And I have to honor why…because it is a developed version of me. A wiser 17 year old me.

Not as a memory.
But as a presence.

17 year old me was free.
Open minded and open hearted.

Moving through a new place with confidence and ease.

So I wanted to honor her fully as I reentered my dream country.

We hear a lot about inner child healing. And Lord knows I’ve done a lot of it.

But what I’m experiencing now is beyond powerful.

Is this a thing? Inner teenager healing?

A thousand times yes!

Because once I started to visualize what life would have looked like if I stayed in Spain 26 years ago, I felt something in me unlock…

I realized that who I am becoming…has outgrown America.

And with that, I decided that is was not only finally time to go back to Spain, but that it was only right to let my inner teenager lead.

So for almost 6 months now, I’ve been moving the way she would have 26 years ago.

More intuitive.
Less structured.
Taking things day by day.

Following what feels natural without overthinking it.

But here’s the powerful part…

Right now, in this chapter, I can hold 17 year old me with the stability, wisdom and clarity of 43 year old me.

Not only is this incredibly exciting, it is RADically healing.

Who were you as a teenager or when you felt most like yourself?

And what would it look like to return to that version of you now alongside who you’ve become?