This is For The Firsts, a weekly letter for the “firsts” navigating career, money & life without a roadmap. Let’s get to work.
After I lost my six-figure corporate job a week before my son was born, I was in a bad spot. When I’ve shared this story previously, I usually skip this part because, honestly, it wasn’t so glamorous.
My first few months of “freedom” consisted of me filing for unemployment, leaving my wife (in postpartum recovery) at home with our newborn so I could attend networking events and mixers in search of my next opportunity, and convincing myself (and everyone around me) that things were going to work out.
Two years ago, what I was making as a creator could barely cover my rent, let alone support me and a growing family in NYC. So I was doing anything and everything I could to make ends meet, including:
Running a coaching cohort for summer interns
Selling 60-min sessions on building a personal brand
Accepting any content deal I could get (anybody remember Smashburger?)
I even did some UGC content for an ice bath brand, which consisted of me filling up an inflatable ice bath with about 70 gallons of ice-cold water in my one-bedroom apartment. It was desperate, and most of it felt completely disconnected from my purpose and my mission.
Eventually, I found myself getting coffee with someone I really respected. They had been a full-time creator for a few years now, and I was hoping to get some advice on what my next step should be. And after I spent about 10 minutes explaining to him what I’ve just told you, he simply told me that I felt stuck because I kept looking for advice.
“You feel stuck because you keep looking for advice”
He went on to say that when you’re on the path of finding your life’s true mission, it can’t come externally. And you have to get to a quiet enough place where you can be honest with yourself about who you are, and the life you want to build.
So that night, I cancelled a few events I had registered for, and took some time to actually listen to myself.
I went on long walks through the city. I went to Central Park and sat on a bench and wrote down whatever came to me. And I stayed up late in the apartment and journaled about what I wanted my future to look like.
Through that process, I had the idea to create this community, For The Firsts. And over the last year and a half, I’ve begun to collect the questions and conversation starters from our meetups that were the best at creating true connection.
Today, we launch First Round: 40 thoughtful conversation starters. This is my first product, and I’ve spent the last year making this something that I’m truly proud of.
These cards were hand-picked from our FTF events, and they’re for anyone who wants to experience how we create true connection at our meetups. It’s for “firsts” walking to their next job interview and unsure of how to connect with the team. It’s for your next dinner party, or family trip.
It’s for you. And I hope you like it.
If you use the code FIRST20 at checkout, you’ll get 20% off your first order. This is a special discount I’m not sharing anywhere else, and it’s how much this Substack community means to me.
What's a "first" you've done, or one you're working toward right now?
I was the first person in my family to have a job in corporate America and move to NYC. And right now I’m working towards becoming my family’s first millionnaire.
What's been your favorite moment from an FTF event so far?
Our very first event. For The Firsts is less than 2 years old, and back then I had no idea if 5 people would show up for this, let alone 50. But putting this community out there and seeing the reaction to it really convinced me that this was needed, and it had the potential to make a really big impact.
What's something you're a little obsessed with lately?
Genuinely? First Round. I’ve been working so hard for so long to make something that I think is worthy of your attention and investment, and I could not be happier with the product we’re releasing today.
What’s something you’re working on right now that you’re excited about? (Remember, no job titles)
I’d love to write a book one day. And continue to grow For The Firsts into the community and business I know it can be.
‘First Up’ is our member spotlight series, highlighting the many incredible members of the FTF community. Want to be featured in a future spotlight? Fill out this form.
First Round: 40 thoughtful conversation starters avaliable now → Shop
Substack family (that’s you) gets 20% off with code FIRST20 → Shop
Creator Economy NYC’s July Mixer & Panel → register
Our next For The Firsts meetup is in August. You can register here.
These are affiliate links, but they’re genuinely the tools I rely on everyday
ManyChat helps me send all of my free and low-priced career guides to you all on Instagram and TikTok.
Claude Cowork keeps my desktop organized and helps my conduct research for my content.
Kit is the platform I use for email automation. It’s also where I send out my free Networking course! (comment “Networking” on any of my IG Reels)
Luma is the best event hosting platform I could ask for, and the official home of our community, For The Firsts.
NEW! shop First Round now here
read previous notes here
register for my next For The Firsts event here
host your own community events in NYC and Chicago at Fabrik
have me speak at your organization by filling out my speaker form
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