Confession: I used to think that the key to a fulfilling life was found in more. More efficiency, more hustle, more presence, more connection—more of everything, all the time. I had a system for every corner of my life, a calendar packed with things I’d said yes to for reasons that weren’t really my own, and a deep belief that if I could just optimize hard enough, I’d finally feel like I had it together.
What I’ve discovered this year is quite the opposite. The biggest thing I’ve done for my wellbeing hasn’t been adding anything—it’s been a massive, ongoing process of simplifying. So many friends told me I was deeply experiencing the year of the snake because I’d done so much shedding over the last year. I’ve taken fewer meetings. Bought less. Said no to things that felt misaligned, even when I couldn’t fully articulate why.
There’s something happening in my nervous system that I can only describe as a rejection of things I’ve outgrown. It’s uncomfortable a lot of the time. But the freedom on the other side of it feels like the most regulating thing I’ve ever done for my health.
This is that list—not a five-step plan, just the honest, still-in-progress things I’ve stopped doing, and what happened when I did.
I stopped answering emails and texts immediately.
I had this deeply held belief that a fast response meant I was on top of things, and that being reachable at all times was just part of being good at my job. What it actually meant was that I was constantly pulling myself out of whatever I was working on and sliding into reactive mode—and whatever I was actually trying to create kept getting the leftover version of me. Now I check email at specific times, and the work I care about gets my most focused attention. The world has actually kept spinning, and I’m enjoying work so much more because of it.
I stopped exercising in ways that feel forced.
This one felt counterintuitive for a long time, but I’ve come to genuinely believe that you can work out less than you think and still feel incredible—the key is actually enjoying what you’re doing. I used to grind through workouts I kind of hated because I thought they were the right ones, and I was so inconsistent because I was running on willpower alone. Now my goal isn’t about how movement makes me look, it’s about how it makes me feel. I take a walk every single day because it gives me energy. I push myself hard once or twice a week because I love the endorphin release. That’s basically it—and I feel so much healthier than I did when I was forcing myself through workouts I dreaded.
I stopped staying up late to “maximize” the evening.
Once the kids are in bed and the house is finally quiet, there can be this pull to stay up late, like I’m reclaiming time that belongs to me. I get it—I lived it for years. But I’d wake up tired and spend the first couple hours of every morning playing catch-up. Somewhere along the way, I started treating rest like something I actually deserved instead of something I was begrudgingly surrendering to, and it genuinely changed things.
I stopped saying yes to every invitation—and normalized leaving parties early.
When I stopped spreading myself thin across every event and obligation, the relationships that actually matter to me got so much deeper. And I’ve never once regretted leaving a party early. Not once. The invitations I say yes to now are ones that I’m actually, genuinely excited about. Not counting down until I can go home.
I stopped finishing books I’m not enjoying.
Life is too short, guys. Three hundred pages of obligation help exactly no one, so consider this your permission slip to just put a book down and move on to something that actually lights you up.
I stopped keeping my phone on me at all times.
This is the one I’m most actively working on, and I’m not going to pretend I have it figured out. But even just leaving my phone in another room while we have dinner, or when I’m hanging out with my kids, has given me these stretches of calm that I didn’t realize I was missing. Like my nervous system can finally exhale. The ambient tension I was carrying around without even noticing it has started to lift, and I don’t know how to describe it except to say it feels like breathing more deeply.
Here’s what I keep coming back to: so much of what I was forcing was coming from fear. Fear of falling behind, missing out, being seen as unresponsive, not doing enough. And when I started loosening my grip on everything—one small thing at a time—life started working with me instead of against me.
I’m still figuring it out, and I think that’s kind of the point.
Okay, your turn.
What’s something you’ve stopped doing that made your life better? I would love to know—let’s build our “Simplify Our Life” list together.
Lots of love, Camille
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