Move Forward Anyway.

“Sell your cleverness and buy bewilderment.” ~ Rumi

Early last year in 2025, I can’t remember exactly what was happening when I said this or why I said it, but I remember saying to Laurie, my friend who is a talent manager and who became my manager after I released my first book in 2024: “Next year I want to dedicate my newsletter to the Divine Feminine.”

I remember this moment feeling more like a quiet and resolved declaration, an energetic stomp of my foot like “Enough is enough, that’s it.” - I nearly forgot I declared this, intended it, until I sat down to write this issue for March. For last month’s issue for Valentine’s Day, loving ourselves (Can you love yourself when nothing is going right?), that was just a happy mistake that it also seems to fit this theme. The Divine Feminine had already begun. Definitely, within me and how I show up.

This month, I knew I wanted to share one of my early Grow with Me by Suhailah podcast episodes from last year because I know many over here on Substack don’t realize I have a podcast, but mostly because I thought the message of that episode, titled Move Forward Anyway, was not only super appropriate for the month of March, but also because we are now in what many know is The Year of the Fire Horse in Chinese Astrology.

March

When I think of March I always think of my sister Fatimah as she was born at the end of this month, and so I always think of Aries as she is one. I also think of flowers and I guess that is because near the end of March also marks the official start to spring.

But March, the word itself comes from Mars. Not only the Roman god of war but the original god of spring, of emergence, of the earth breaking ground after winter. Before it meant anything else, March meant begin. Move. It was the original first month of the Roman calendar. The month where the year started, the month where dormancy ended, the month where the first movement after stillness became possible. The month of March literally means the earth waking up.

When it comes to the Chinese new year, horses are actually my favorite animal. They are so free, so powerful, so intuitive, so fierce (as in fabulous), so sensitive to energy, to people, and to the touch. And when they run, they leave everything and everyone in the dust unless you are on top of one and along for the ride. (Dolphins might be a close 2nd favorite animal for me because they are so smart and remind me of people. Kind, loving, high frequency people.) Also, I dream very vividly - very real feeling and seeming nighttime or nap time dreams - and while animals don’t appear often in my dreams generally speaking, horses have appeared a great deal over the years.

The energy and sheer strength of the horse might at first register for some as highly masculine, and while that is true too, the Fire Horse that this Chinese new year is about is not tamed by force or control, and so the feminine principle that meets this energy is Surrender. It must be surrender. Has to be.

Not surrender as in giving up, but surrender as in a state of being. This is not an action or something you check off of your list to do. This kind of surrender means trusting the momentum beneath you enough to stop gripping. Let it carry you forward. You don’t tame a Fire Horse by controlling it, you ride it by releasing the need to steer every step and trusting that it knows the terrain.

In this year, the woman who tries to control the Fire Horse year will exhaust herself; the woman who surrenders to its momentum will cover ground she never could have covered alone.

Although this was not my conscious intention when I recorded and released this podcast episode last May, the Divine Feminine principle that most precisely fits it is exactly that: Surrender. Again, not surrender as giving up, but surrender as releasing the need to control how the forward movement happens before we take the step.

As I mentioned, this year in Spark I want to explore the principles of the Divine Feminine. Not as a gender conversation but as a way of being available to everyone. Each month one principle and so March is Surrender.

In the podcast episode that I’m sharing, I touch on a feeling of resistance that may actually be a call to move. Just like the meaning of the month of March declares. That is the feminine principle of trusting the body’s knowing over the mind’s demand for a blueprint.

I say this for myself in this moment of great change, expansion, and elevation as much as I say it for anyone reading this: We don’t need to see the whole path. We just need to trust what we already feel. The masculine principle of forward movement is I will move when I have a plan. The Divine Feminine principle of forward movement is I will move because I can feel it is time. That is exactly what this podcast episode (embedded below) explores.

(Today is also International Women’s Day and March is Women’s History Month, so other appropriate and celebratory alignments.)

Move forward anyway.

Happy March. Happy listening.

~ Suhailah 🩷💫

One more thing.

I recently opened a new section of my Substack called the Awakening Journal & Writings. For 13 years I have been faithfully writing down my dreams. Nearly 10,000 typed pages now. And counting. Some have come true. Many, actually. Some have universal themes and messages. Many, actually. All of them inform and guide me and my life. This dream archive is becoming my next book and I am now sharing select entries and writings here/there for the first time.

As a Spark free subscriber you may occasionally receive free post (emails) from a sender called Dream Walker | Suhailah under the same email address you get this one from. That is me, just from the dream side of this publication. Same Spark publication, different section. If it resonates, you are welcome to explore and subscribe. If it doesn’t call to you right now, you can simply let those emails pass. No obligation either way.

There are a few entries there already. You can find one here (Click Thumbnail Below):

Move forward anyway.

Happy listening. Happy March.

~ Suhailah 💙💫

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