“Name: Joe [redacted]
Email: [redacted]
Type of Inquiry: Other
Subject: Help/advice"
Message: Hi Jenny,
My name is Joe and yes I’m not a women and I realize that may seem odd! I came across your article on dating after 50 while on Apple News. You struck a cord with me personally with dating apps and the many pitfalls that exist on them. Attitudes and many fake profiles are no joke as I painfully found out.”
Right out of the gate, Joe is the victim 🙄. Women literally get raped and killed from meeting men on the dating apps, but Joe here, like so many courageous men before him, has been victimized by “attitudes” (😂😂😂) and “fake profiles.” He found this out “painfully.” 🙄
“At the end of 2025 going into winter 2026 I had my profile on Match after not being on dating apps in many years boy has it changed! I was on for 6 months and I finally gave up after never going out on a date and being informed that about 15 women I had contact with were removed for suspicious activity.”
Emoji-only reaction: 🎻🎻🎻 🎭🎭🎭 🙄🙄🙄
“So why am I reaching out to you? I’m hoping you could give me some dating advice on dating in 2026. You could say no and that would be fine I would just move on.”
Okayyyyyyyyyy. Hold the phone. Men say sh*t like this constantly, and it flies under the radar, so let’s break it down: Joe is giving me permission to not accommodate him. Joe that I don’t know. Joe who has already stated that he knows I work only with women. He’s reassuring me that if I “say no” he will “just move on,” as though he has any other legal option.
“In the end if I don’t try I’ll never know if you could help a guy like me. I’m willing to try if you’re willing to listen to me.”
😂😂😂 What?! This is the funniest line because of the implication. Joe’s assumption here is that I would receive some sort of personal, emotional reward from him “trying.” He’s making a deal with me: he’s willing to try if I’m willing to listen to him. What on earth would I gain from this deal? There’s clearly no academic, monetary, or cultural capitol at stake; I would just get . . . to help Joe? Why would I care? Do you see the entitlement that must be operating beneath the surface for Joe-Strange-Man-On-The-Internet to assume that I’m invested in his happiness? I honestly do not think he’s trying to be ridiculous; he believes this, and it’s revealing of how a lot of men enter the dating market: they assume that women exist as balms to their souls and fixers of their issues, and moreover, that this is somehow OUR goal as well—to soothe and fix them. The audacity it requires to hold this belief is staggering. The dating apps are peppered with men like Joe, men who have created an entire fictional economy that resides only in their imaginations, an economy in which men’s time, attention, desire, and feelings comprise both capitol and profit—not only for themselves, but for any hypothetical woman on earth.
“I feel like I am a decent person who has a lot to give the right person but I just don’t know how to go about finding that person? Any help your willing to give me would be greatly appreciated!!! I’m fully aware you only give advice to women but for what ever reason I feel like I needed to reach out anyway.”
Interesting. Joe is “fully aware,” and yet he thought, for some reason, that I would make an exception for him, a total stranger-man from the internet with nothing to offer me other than the opportunity to interact with Joe, I guess. Joe is one of those men who attempts to enter women’s spaces and somehow does not see that as a transgression. Weird.
"Thanks for considering my odd request. -Joe.”
I didn’t consider it, but thank you to Joe for the content for this article. 🙄
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