Friends, before I begin, I know how precious your time is. Thank you for choosing to dedicate a slice of it to reading this.
11 months ago I posted on LinkedIn about the red squiggle that appears under the word 'matrescence' when I write about it.
I understand the logic behind why it’s there. But for me that red squiggle is symbolic of something deeper:
we don't recognise the word...
we don't know what it means...
we don't really understand it.
If you follow me on social media you will have seen me reposting about the #MakeMatrescenceMainstream campaign Peanut x Tommee Tippee have launched.
You can read all about it here.
It began with a full-page ad in the New York Times.👇🏻
Matrescence has gone viral, or at least in my feeds. And so it should.
When I discovered matrescence seven years into motherhood it felt like a light had been switched on in a dark room. Finally, so much of what I had experienced had a name.
The developmental process of becoming a mother - matrescence - is often likened to the developmental transition between childhood and adulthood: adolescence.
Imagine if we still lived without the language and understanding of adolescence.
Imagine how we would feel moving through adolescence not knowing what was happening to us physically, psychologically, emotionally, and socially. Imagine the shame, guilt, isolation, and confusion. How lost we might feel.
This is what we have been asking mothers and families to do — perhaps even you.
To move through one of the, if not the, most significant transitions of a lifetime without adequate language, understanding, or support.
Because what we don’t name... we don’t study. We don’t fund. We don’t support.
If you’d like to support this movement, you can sign this petition asking Oxford, Merriam-Webster, and tech companies to add matrescence to the dictionary.
It’s time language caught up with lived experience.
My new book Seen Again: Light on Matrescence also explores this profound transition of becoming a mother. It illuminates both the dark corners where shame lurks and the light-filled moments of feeling seen. Eighteen other women share their matrescence stories alongside mine.
With great joy, I held the first printed copies in my hands yesterday.
Seen Again is now available to pre-order.
If you already have a feeling this might be a book for you, pre-ordering is one of the most helpful ways you can support a book and help it reach more mothers.
Pre-orders genuinely make a bigger difference than most people realise — helping booksellers, publishers and the industry see that a book matters, which means it has a better chance of finding the mothers who need it most.
If you feel called, I would be deeply grateful if you considered pre-ordering a copy for you, a daughter, sister, niece, sister-in-law or friend. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. ❤️
Here is the link to order on Amazon.
It’s time we start to see mothers.
With love,
Benita x
p.s. If this post resonated with you, feel free to share it with another mother who might need the language for what she’s experiencing. xx
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