Why your friends don't care about ICE (and how to change that)

I thought we already knew about ICE raiding our streets and kidnapping our neighbors. We forget that not everyone has connections with people directly impacted, and those whose neighborhoods are under siege.

I thought we already knew how to fight back. We forget that not everyone has been flooded with calls to action, scripts, hotlines, and mutual aid requests for the past decade.

I thought all of us are already working at capacity - if not through direct action, then as secondary support. We forget that not everybody is already hacking away at the roots of the kyriarchy.

Despite knowing darn well that we need to know about the problem, know how the problem impacts us, and know why we need to address it right away - I keep forgetting that not everyone cares about what we care about, and knows what we know.

It’s tempting to just snuggle up in my silo and not waste time on folks who aren’t proactively showing up for every issue I care about.

But then I remember that the US government is working as designed - keeping average citizens placated with the bread and circuses of Super Bowl halftime shows and ignorant about the underpinnings of our foundations.

There’s a reason those who hold so much power feel disconnected and disempowered when it comes to smashing the kyriarchy.

Enter ::trumpet noises:: the Triumvirate of Mobilization!

Surely, I tell myself - everybody already knows how the Triumvirate of Mobilization (ToM) works. You must be sick of me talking about it in everything from my shitty experimental podcast, our dismantling wealth inequality, and in the Busy Parents Guide to Getting Shit Done workshop.

So I avoid repeating myself, even when we need it most - when all of us are struggling through despair, procrastination, and apathy.

But not everyone has been hanging onto my every word for the past decade, and then retaining 100% of it to be pulled out at exactly the right moment at all times. (How dare you.)

And even if you have committed every single tool I’ve provided over the past decade to memory, you might not have translated that into how you can launch other people into action.

Welp - here’s your refresher.

To launch your friends into action, they need your help with three things:

1. Knowledge and understanding of how this problem affects us

2. Urgency on why we need to act now

3. Capability and capacity - accessible and appropriate resources, tools & directions

Your friends need to know what’s going on. They might not know what imperialism, fascism, and ethnic cleansing look like. They might not know how this issue affects us and the people you both care about.

Oh sure, we might know there’s a problem - but without knowing how problem impacts us and we can do about it, we’ll just get stuck in apathy or despair.

You don’t have to know absolutely everything about an issue, with data-driven evidence. You can just share your story - what’s going on, how it makes you feel, and what you’re afraid could happen to them if you don’t do something about it.

“My friends in Minnesota are terrified - their coworker was just kidnapped from the school parking lot. I’m afraid they’re going to take my immigrant father if he shows up to work. I’m worried they’re going to take me because of my links to activism groups. I’m worried about how my Autistic child is going to behave when ICE comes to their school - will his shrieking and failure to comply get him shot?”

News reports, big numbers, historical facts - those are great supporting evidence, but what really persuades someone to care about an issue are real stories about how this issue affects people like you, even if you’re not directly targeted.

The reason so few people take action on climate change is because that’s a later problem for later people. Even if those ‘later people’ are us in five years.

To avoid falling into procrastination and apathy, we need to see how the people and lives we love right now are in precipitous danger if we don’t take action right away.

ICE is all over Minnesota, Maine, LA, and so on - but unless folks understand that a failure to act NOW means they’ll be in your front yard tomorrow, the dishes need to be done, the bills need to be paid, and the cat just barfed on the rug - people are busy, distracted, and tired.

So we need to know what’s at stake - and what’s worth letting everything else slide while we address the larger problem right away.

Awareness involves a lot of infodumping and waving our hands in the air in panic - this is great for the attention economy and transforming outrage into $$$.

But if we’re not removing barriers and equipping each other with appropriate tools to fight, all you’ve got is a bunch of people who are scared, angry, frustrated, and panicking.

Sometimes, all it takes is asking “What does support look like for you?” - it could be that your friends are eager to help, but just need help with logistics like childcare, meal prep, or transportation.

Or maybe they have the time, money, and energy - but they just don’t know where to direct it. I know you have saved the number of your area’s reliable ICE hotline in your phone already. And you’ve already taken a Know Your Rights Training, and prepared your kids with what to do if ICE comes to your home or school. I know you’ve designated alternative pickup adults for your kids and created a safety plan.

And if you’re a builder, a baker, a candlestick maker, I’m sure you’ve come up with creative ways to use your expertise, hobbies, and skills to support front-line fighters and immigrants under siege.

But do your friends know? I bet you have at least one great thing in your noggin that they’d appreciate you sharing.

with you,
Ashia

Here’s a toolkit for kids showing that you don’t have to do it ALL - but that there’s power in sharing the spare resources, energy, and power that brings you joy to contribute.

Collective Action Toolkit