In this week’s article, Fatherhood is the Highest Stakes Leadership Role You’ll Ever Have, I partnered with best-selling author Robert Glazer on a thought experiment:
If our kids wrote a 360 review of us… would it sound like feedback for a micromanaging boss?
Most dads don’t hover because we’re controlling. We over-function because of dad gaps we rarely name. Across 200+ conversations, I keep seeing the same six - related to work-life balance, a lack of role models, confidence, and dads to confide in, co-parenting challenges, and no clear strategy for how we want to parent.
When those gaps go unaddressed, we drift into two defaults: control or withdrawal. The counter-move requires us to design with intention a vision and philosophy for our fatherhood.
This week’s clip is from Braxton Storm: former foster child, now a social worker, and a dad of four.
He shares a belief he sees in a lot of fathers: “I’m not enough.”
When that’s the soundtrack, dads can parent from pressure, trying to prove they’re doing it right, instead of parenting from calm and connection.
Check out Braxton’s full Ambitious Dads Podcast interview here.
This week, notice where control is trying to pose as “good leadership.”
Work / Leadership: Where am I “hovering” right now (over-checking, redoing, jumping in too early)? Pick one task to give to a colleague and ensure they own it by asking for them to hold you accountable in letting go.
Fatherhood: Pick one recurring moment (homework, bedtime, playground time), and ask: “Am I helping my kid… or helping myself avoid discomfort?” If it’s discomfort, let them work it out.
If you’re feeling one of the Dad Gaps hard right now and want a clearer operating system at home (without losing your edge at work), I offer leadership and fatherhood coaching.
If you want to explore working together, book a conversation here.
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