Masking AuDHD: Damned If We Do, Damned If We Don't

I want to begin with a very brief but highly relevant history lesson, then I promise to explain what new research reveals about masking.

Did you know? Between the 1500s and 1700s, some women who were accused of witchcraft were subjected to a cruel and bizarre sort of “swim test”. The accused would be bound with ropes and tossed into water to see if they would sink or swim. If they were not witches, they would drown. If they were witches, the water would supposedly reject their bodies and prevent them from submerging. In such cases, they would be pulled out and burned at the stake.

A perfect illustration of the meaning behind the phrase, “damned if you do, damned if you don’t”.

Lorenzo Dow, who was considered a “rebel” Methodist preacher in the early 1800s, popularized the phrase in a catchy chant about Calvinism. Apparently traditional Calvinists do not believe in free will, and their branch of faith teaches that god predestines people to be saved or condemned before they are even born. Of the complete purposelessness and hopelessness of life if you are one of the condemned, Dow wrote:

“You can and you can’t —

You shall and you shan’t —

You will and you won’t —

And you will be damned if you do —

And you will be damned if you don’t.”