I’m old enough to remember not having anything to do while waiting in a line. Nothing to look at besides the clock on the wall or the one on my wrist. If I’m smart, I might have had a pocket book with me or a Readers Digest. My first retail job involved me standing around and waiting for customers. I talked to my colleagues despite the language barrier (I didn’t know how to speak Fiji Hindi and still don’t) because I didn’t have anything else to do besides watching the many clocks on the shelves sporting a price tag.
I’m also young enough to remember having a smartphone while going to University. When I moved from Fiji to New Zealand, I had the benefit of an iPhone and Google Maps to guide me. That’s what’s unique about being a millennial — we’ve experienced boredom and forgotten how to be bored.
I opened a tab recently in my web browser and instinctively typed “Substack”. The address autocompleted and resolved, but before I could fall into my normal browsing, I had to sign in. I anticipated this automatic impulse — to load Substack and browse, to check my notification bell and know someone “engaged”. I was so close to doing it. What stopped me was the effort of finding my password and confirming two-factor authentication.
It’s instinctual now, this urge to open my phone and swipe. I want to visit Reddit so now I don’t have the App installed. I want to waste time on YouTube so now I don’t save my history.
I’ve intentionally thrown up barriers to avoid this unintentional behavior. It doesn’t always work, but it doesn’t need to — just most of the time. Enough that I gradually forget the reflex.
If you like my writing and want to say thanks with a few dollars, please consider doing so via my ko-fi and not Substack
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