Deconstructing ME.

It’s been seven years since the dinner which was featured in Deconstructing Karen was filmed. At times it feels like seven minutes ago and at others, seven million years.

What I’ve learned during these seven painfully long and short years is this: you can’t deconstruct anyone else. Not Karen. Not Becky. Not Chad.

The only person you can deconstruct is yourself.

Which is what I’ve been working on in earnest since October 7, 2023. The debt I owe to Palestine and Palestinians is immeasurable.

Yes, I’m brown.

Yes, I’m a woman.

Yes, my ancestors were victims of white colonizers.

Other things about me?

I have an American passport.

I am a human.

In these capacities, I am capable of and have committed profound harm to other humans–in Vietnam, Iraq, Afghanistan, Libya, Syria, Sudan, Congo, Palestine, Haiti, Cuba, Venezuela, Indonesia, Kashmir.

Hell, let’s be honest – the entirety of South America, Central America, Asia, Africa.

Turtle Island.

This is for starters.

Then there are the plants, the animals, the sealife. The sea itself. Lakes, rivers, forests, mountains.

What have all the cars I’ve driven done to them? The cars I’ve ridden in, the planes? The “food” I’ve consumed? The shopping centers and the strip malls? The clothes? The housing? The movies? TV? Internet? Phones? The SKIING? Jesus, all the times I put little metal sticks on my feet to get a thrill. How many trees were annihilated? How many plant and animal species have I displaced? How many humans?

All for fun – and to line the pockets of a bunch of corrupt Vail dipshits.

I DID THIS.

Over the past few years, thinking about my work with white women used to make me cringe at myself. But I’m over that now. Life is a journey. And my Race2Dinner work - Deconstructing Karen and White Women, the book - have been integral parts of that journey.

Without them, I wouldn’t be here, focused on unfucking myself.

As the oceans continue to boil, deadly chemicals strangle our skies, the Epstein class continues to rape and eat our children, Israel and the US and their craven cronies continue to rape and pillage our fellow humans in Palestine, Lebanon and Iran, as we extinct our trees, flowers, herbs, animals, insects, fish…. Let us focus on deconstructing OUR role in all of it.

Only then can we lessen our harm and attempt to create and build something different, better or at least something anything that doesn’t empower genocidal pedophiles.

Everyday I work on loving myself more. Everyday I work on interrogating myself deeper.

My work with white women set me down this path that I’m committed to walk for the rest of my life.

How can I expect white women, men, Americans, Israelis to exercise humility if I do not?