Reading · The Mother Project with Sophie Beresiner

Before I turned 45, I’d not been too worried about the physicality of getting older, and the related changes to my appearance, because by some miraculous quirk of metabolism, it hadn’t properly happened to me yet. But then my 45th turn around the sun arrived, and I think my some part of my DNA caught on, because the difference in my reflection between this birthday and last was exponentially and annoyingly significant. There have been a few studies that (depressingly) explain why, and I touched on this one very briefly before but in case it’s helpful to know more; At a molecular level, we age dramatically at two accelerated bursts, around age 44 and 60. So yes, the timing aligns perfectly for me. I appreciate that my mums wondrous skin genes, and my decades of beauty industry access, some light touch botox, and tech and product drops have helped my face out massively - (I am annoyingly delighted when I’m told I don’t look my age). BUT, I now realise it’s my hair that has made the biggest difference to how I perceive myself at the moment. Since we’re being honest I went for the quickest fix first. Botox makes me look less tired, LED and Ziip boosts my skin and my spirits, but still, the general unruliness of my hair has been getting me down. Where I once had manageable, swishy (after some reliable home-styling) waves, with decent shine and hold, I now have a persistent dullness, usually with limp waves that both puff out and drop after five minutes, and frizzy roots. Roots! Plus the entire and sudden patches of grey, rather than the odd strand. I would embrace the colour change more if the condition of my hair were not making me feel as frazzled as it looked. Or it DID, I should say, because I’ve done the hard work and understood the why, and found a doable, affordable bag-of-tricks routine that I will say is working. Listen, I got ID’d at the supermarket the other day, just saying…

I am lucky to have knowledge on my side, so once I resigned myself to the root (pardon the pun) cause of my hair decline - ageing obviously - I set about changing some key products, habits and getting the right help to master this reverse-hair-ageing business. (Spoiler, I think I’ve done it!)

First up, I started thinking of my hair regime the same way as my skincare. I wouldn’t go into my thirties and forties using the same moisturiser I had since I was a teenager because my older skin has different needs. It’s no surprise then that so does my hair, in pretty much the same way. Richer textures, more actives, more products in general to target my evolving, age-related needs.

The trick is to understand what you’re missing, and put it back. It’s moisture, by the way, because your scalp gradually produces less sebum as you age, resulting in drier, coarser, more frizz prone hair. If this is accompanied by a dip in oestrogen (perimenopause you effing beast of an arse), then the issue might occur all of a sudden, like mine seems to have done, in which case you need to give it everything it needs with a side order of of intensive care, habit-changing and possibly some growth serum thrown in for good anti-hair thinning measure. My reverse ageing secret is hydration-layering. A pre-wash oil is lovely, but in all honesty it’s an organisational step too far in my experience. 1st, shampoo (being mindful of my ingredients - anything that promotes hydration and healthy growth like biotin, collagen, or hyaluronic acid is best) and then a deep conditioning mask, yes, every wash. Avoid bonding treatments like Olaplex or K18 unless you have chemically treated or damaged hair, because you might think they’re going to solve all your frizzy hair problems (like I did) but actually too much keratin can make it worse (like mine ended up). Nope, you simply want deep hydration for the soft, shiny win, and leave it on for as long as you can. Five years ago my hair would go limp at the thought of so many humectants, but it shows what a difference a half-decade can make. So much so that I’ll follow that with a leave-in oil, the real hair hero here - on dripping wet mid-lengths to ends. This moisture-layering will ensure my hair will cooperate with the styling stage, whilst looking youthful, feeling soft and swishy and above all healthy every time. Regardless of whether or not you have thinning, your hair health will benefit from a peptide to help stimulate the hair growth cycle. Think of it as an ageing preventative measure. Type Bea overnight boosting peptide serum used every night can help extend the growth phase of your hair so you essentially have more of it at once, and you know what looks youthful? Thick hair and lots of it.

Before we get into good habits we need to talk about greys. I know in my heart I will embrace them one day, but I’m just not ready yet. Partly because I need to trust in the condition of my hair first, and partly because I don’t want to! Grey is not my colour today, salon-crafted chestnut brown is, so if my parting has other ideas (oh my god, it really does) I beg to differ with box dye between salon visits. There is nothing easier than a root-specific formula with a built-in applicator brush but make it ammonia free so you don’t dry the hair out. For emergency temporary touch ups I like a mascara-style wand rather than a root spray so I know I’m not clogging the follicles and causing more issues. Check. it. out:

Use Less Heat

The key to reverse-ageing your hair is protecting your scalp, and that means using less heat wherever possible. No one wants to air dry every day, so I rely on smoothing my hair one of two ways to get more gloss and anti-frizz control. One is Dyson Airstraight, (or newly launched and yes, cheaper Shark SilkiPro) which use directional airflow - crucially away from the scalp - to dry hair wet-to-straight really quickly, easily and effectively. Otherwise I’ll add some wave-enhancing styling cream (have you tried Merwave? love it), let it dry naturally, then straighten the ends only, so it looks styled, intentional, but no heat came near my roots or scalp.

All Silk Everything

Your cotton pillow is causing friction which is damaging your hair. So is your towel for that matter, oh and your hair ties, and maybe even your eye mask. Swap it all out for silk if you can. You’ll find your style will hold for longer, your hair will need washing less often (also a reverse-aging trick) less frizz, more shine, I could go on.

Start On The Inside

Good eating habits will help with most things in life, and hair ageing is no exception. On top of your increased intake of Omega-3 rich foods (the fatty acids are your hair’s best friend) like fatty fish, chia and flaxseed, walnuts et cetera, as well as protein which is also essential, you can boost your hair health with specialised supplements. Vida Glow Hairology is a brilliant micronutrient option for stronger, healthier hair.

Hard Water Help

Possibly the quickest change we can all benefit from is filtering out the trace metals and minerals from our hard water. The bad news is it’s basically everywhere, and it builds up on the hair shaft and follicle adding to dryness, dullness and hair thinning. But the good news is you can easily recalibrate with a hard water filter (I have both an overhead Jolie and a hand held Hello Klean showerhead).

I like to think of my own reverse hair-ageing as a personal journey, so I want to be the master of it. So to boost my best efforts, I’ve found some amazing home treatments to encourage healthier, younger looking hair.

The ever-popular at-home LED treatment is not limited to your skin. Consider investing in a scalp stimulating brush like the Foreo LED Hair Strengthening Scalp Massager, which uses red light and gentle stimulating massage to encourage blood flow to the hair follicles, boosting sebum production and promoting healthy hair growth. The Solaris Laboratories Intensive LED Growth Stimulating Brush is a great budget-friendly option too.

Then there’s the absolutely insane looking but wonderful LED hair growth helmets. I’ve just got the CurrentBody one (love), and while I commit to the regular treatments in order to see results, my kids can marvel at the fact their mother seems to be preparing to join the next NASA moon mission.

My final piece of advice, and something I probably enjoyed the most on this reverse-ageing mission, is leaning into the change. I went and got a drastically different cut about a year ago - going from scraggly long and drag-you-down waves to a choppy blunt bob, and I felt so much better for it. It took years as well as inches off, because not only is it of course terribly chic, but by removing longer, heavy ends, your hair looks fuller, healthier and frames your face better to define jaw and cheekbones. So, style your hair in a way you might not have done before, choose a bolder colour, or go shorter for a bit of a refresh.

The moral of the story is basically there’s no getting around biological ageing, nor do I want to - I’m just aiming to get slightly ahead of it, instead. That’s fair enough right?