Another episode of Trump's Profiles in Cowardice

Monday August 10, 2026

Remember back at the NATO summit in Ankara, Turkey when Trump had to fly home in the shitty ass old Air Force One that is totally not good enough for him because he wanted, the White House preposterously lied, to give American troops in Europe the chance to see the new tarted up glitzed out bribe plane from Qatar like they gave a rat’s ass? LOLOL like anyone bought that. The New York Times, back then, reported, about a minute later, that that was utter bullshit and reason Trump couldn’t use the Qatar bribe plane was because of Iranian death threats that it wasn’t equipped to repel. Trump subsequently had his goons serve subpoenas to the New York Times reporters because those reporters were a threat to national security, don’t you know? As if.

Well today, in an exclusive, the Washington Post reports that Trump wasn’t even on the old shitty ass Air Force One and that one was used as a “decoy” even though it was filled with journalists and White House staff members who believed they were on the same plane as the president.

Leaving Turkey, the Post reports, Trump waddled into the old Air Force One for the cameras, and then, as a precaution against the potential Iranian assassination attempt, “was secretly shuttled minutes later to a smaller plane - an Air Force C-32A - via an airport catering truck typically used to load meals and other supplies preflight.” Damn, I bet that gives the White House staffers who were left behind to be cannon fodder the old warm and fuzzies huh? Meanwhile, is there actually anything more predictable than the cowardly Trump slinking away and leaving his associates out to dry?? That was a rhetorical question.

Aaron Rupar shared a nutty clip today of drunk former Fox weekend host Pete Hegseth – speaking of macho men - standing next to arrogant prick Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent blabbing. As per usual, Bessent was just spouting bullshit so nothing to see there but, holy shit, Hegseth was wiping snot from his nose and then running his hand through his hair. Eeeeewwww. Josh Billinson from Semafor recalled how, back in Pull-up Pete’s idiotic Fox & Friends days, he used to brag that he never washed his hands and didn’t believe germs were real. (I promise I’ll get to why this is germane in addition to being gratuitously hilarious.)

Hegseth’s on-camera action is so bananas we need to thank our lucky stars that he’s “only” ruining our nation’s military and our standing in the world and has nothing to do with our nation’s public health. But wait because, oh, f*ck, the dude who is, is, inconceivably, even worse!!! Yup, you may recall, our nation’s HHS Secretary, roadkill enthusiast RFK Jr, boasted earlier this year on Theo Von’s podcast that "I'm not scared of a germ. I used to snort cocaine off of toilet seats." It’s good to be proud of your accomplishments.

And today, thanks to the crackpot Kennedy’s whackadoodle beliefs about germs and drugs and vaccines and say when, Trump, with “his dear friend” Kennedy standing next to him, signed an executive order that "Effective immediately, my administration is recognizing gold standard childhood vaccine recommendations for only 11 core vaccinations against the most serious and dangerous diseases along with the MMR, which hopefully will be split up." The order also calls on schools to change their vaccination requirements. Hold the phone!!!!

Why in the actual hell, with the stunning improvements in childhood health we have accomplished over the last several decades, would he do this??? "Decades ago,” Trump says, “children received only a small fraction of the vaccines required today. In those times, people were much healthier and of course the high rates of autism now observed did not exist. There's a reason for such epidemic rates of autism."

OMG this is such crackpot conspiracy theory horseshit it makes me want to weep or vomit or both. Not that it needs to be refuted for anyone with functioning brain cells, but as the Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health notes, the “overwhelming global scientific consensus is that vaccines do not cause autism.”

Yet here we are: the ridiculous idiot who once suggested COVID could be cured by injecting bleach up your ass is now giving vaccine advice to parents about breaking up the MMR vaccine into multiple visits, saying that "At one year, you should have 5 separate visits for vaccines rather than getting them all in the same day. I've seen proof of where they have a vaccination thing that looks like the size of a bottle of soda and pour it into a little child's body." Wait, what????

He’s seen proof that they’re injecting stuff the size of a bottle of soda into kids???? Come on!!! What are we even doing anymore????
Trump is so concerned about the nonexistent vaccine-autism connection that when NIH Director Jay Bhattacharya drones on about an initiative he’s working on to find the cause of autism Trump proceeds to fall so soundly asleep that he’s slumping to the side. The fact that (1) the “president” sleepfarts through pretty much every other meeting and (2) it’s the same monumental piece of shit who used to call Joe Biden “Sleepy Joe” every other second and (3) it’s still not a blaring front page story will never not be a travesty.

While he’s still awake, Trump dismisses concerns about the new vaccine policy and says “nothing bad can happen from what we’re doing,” Phew. I feel better.

Poor hideous sellout Louisiana Senator Bill Cassidy, alas, apparently does not feel better. The crazily un-self-aware Cassidy today posted on not-Twitter: “I’m a doctor. This executive order is wrong. The President does not have the expertise to make these changes. Vaccines are overwhelmingly safe. Vaccines are effective. Vaccines DO NOT cause autism. Breaking up vaccines will mean children have to get more shots to get the same protection, not fewer shots. It will increase hesitancy and make children less safe. Parents should listen to their child’s pediatrician about vaccines rather than listening to an inaccurate executive order. This is so wrong.” If only Cassidy could have done something to keep that loony vaccine denying obvious nut job Kennedy out of power, right?? Oh, right, he cast the deciding vote for him. What in the actual f*ck is wrong with this asshole???

During the press availability after the ridiculous announcement, Trump addresses his idiotic war of choice in Iran, which he has no clue how to get out of. He lies that “The Strait of Hormuz is actually open now. Well, it's a little complex because they will on occasion drop a mine.” Holy shit!!! Yeah, those mines blowing up boats make that whole “being open” thing a little dicey.

A reporter asks: “You said this was Iran’s last chance. What now?”
Trump: “You will find out.” LOLOL Yeah, as soon as Trump’s next brain fart gives him a signal. Can the mainstream media, for the love of God, at least kindly give up the fiction that this moron has any earthly clue what is going on with Iran???

Extra Credit:

MacFarlane News reports today that internal National Park Service records show a 5000% increase in money for Trump’s White House grounds upgrades and vanity projects.

Well that gold plating is pricy – at least it’s money well spent.
Speaking of, amidst the endless AI-generated slop and lie-filled nonsense Trump incessantly posts on his dumbass personal social media site, it slipped through the cracks yesterday that, in a post there, he admitted there was zero video or photographic evidence of the “vandals” that supposedly ruined the (non)Reflecting Pool. He also, astonishingly, admitted that “some contractor error” was part of the problem. These admissions, of course, came after weeks of him (and Judge Box Wine and Doug Burgum and the whole lying lot of them) blatantly lying about the mountains of evidence they had and how the contractors were perfect. The New York Times, and God bless them for their incredible work, calls it a “change in rhetoric.”

The New York Times also reports today – no rhetoric, just facts – that the nonsensical, needless, performative National Guard deployment in DC has been extended to Trump’s last day in office and that a “$292 million federal contract was recently awarded for building 'apartment-style lodging units' for the troops.” Wheeee!!!! Because nothing says free and open democracy like building garrisons for the leader’s shock troops in the capital. Is anyone besides us paying attention FFS???

Thanks so much for reading and stay safe and healthy everyone!!! Remember we are not the crazy ones!!!

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