I saw a reel through a friend’s Instagram stories where a person was reading out aloud from a book. The gist of it was - If you complain, the law of attraction says you’ll get more to complain about. Even if you listen to people complain & sympathize, you’ll attract more in your life to complain about.
By itself, this actually creates more confusion & problems than actually bring about positive change.
Almost 5-6 years ago, I had read the usual books on “Manifestation”.. The Secret, The Power of your subconscious mind etc. While they were good books and gave a wonderful new perspective I didn’t have before, with time I realized that they don’t give you the full picture.
If you attract what you think and do, then you start worrying when you feel any negative emotion whatsoever. You force yourself to feel gratitude, think positively and snap out of it. Thereby, bypassing or avoiding the emotions that you should actually sit with & process. You do this one too many times, you get into a state of toxic positivity.
Initially, thinking only positive things might be good, it may even bring results. But down the line, you start getting frustrated, angry and disappointed. Those feelings scare you even more and you force yourself to stay positive…. on and on, until the dam breaks. This is the effect of taking just one law and using that to run your life… there are many more that impact us, but the law of attraction is the one that became famous, leaving behind all its other co-stars.
My learning, inner work, experience got me to stop manifesting and start co-creating. Aka a more involved way of bringing your desires to life.
You don’t just go ‘I want this.’ You don’t just attract, you take action to co-create the life of your dreams.
You clear the hurdles that stop you from bringing that desire to life, you take action and do your part in co-creating, you move through all the experiences on that journey to ‘manifest’ something and realize you became the person who naturally attracts the life you desire. That is co-creation and it way more than just the ‘law of attraction’.
So let’s say you desire a wonderful life partner or health or quality of life… You are at a certain starting point when you start working towards it or co-creating. You don’t know how long it would take for that desire to be fulfilled. It may take months or years… Will you never ever have negative emotions in that time at all?
How long can you stay positive and not think a single negative thought?
Is it even possible to try being positive for months and years on end without ever once feeling frustrated, getting angry or complaining?
We are humans, we are meant to experience Life as it is. Not just the good parts, but all of it… the good, the bad and everything in between.
I mean we have all seen the movie, Inside Out! Your anger shows you what you were protecting yourself from, your fear shows how you were keeping yourself safe, your frustration shows you what is not right for you, your sadness shows you something worth sitting with, your joy comes through all of it. This is not our fault, but what we've been conditioned to believe - that negative emotions are a problem to fix. And ‘thinking positive’ isn’t helping with deconditioning that belief!
Because when you just try to ‘stay positive’, you actually miss out on life. You avoid the life you are supposed to be living. You repress the emotions you were meant to experience and move through. Those repressed emotions stay in you and make you physically sick… your chronic illnesses have a source in all that you repressed in your life.
In essence, ‘being positive’ should be your natural state of being. Your underlying energy is positive, your way of thinking is positive, your mindset is positive, you look at your life positively, your overall state of being is positive. And complaining once in a while, getting angry for a bit, being pissed off for a day… doesn’t still change your underlying state. You are just experiencing life and expressing yourself.
Written by Reshma Bangarimath - Spiritual Coach, Akashic Records Healer & Author of Speak Your Magic | Hyderabad, India · reshmabangarimath.in
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