FIELD NOTES: December 7–17

Weather: ❄️ Dark at 4:30.

Welcome back to Field Notes — a weekly-ish log of the city’s most confusing, suspicious, and strange phenomena.

Here’s what we observed:

• The NYC tow depot may have finally met its match: the employees at Le Labo Williamsburg. Multiple firsthand reports describe them as astonishingly mean — not rushed, not overwhelmed, just committed to hostility.

“They are SO mean. It’s like a demon twink and his girl best friend. They won’t even be busy and they’ll be behind the counter talking shit about you.”

“I won’t go back there. That’s how rude they are. I’m scared of those g*d d*mn 20-year-olds.”

• Attended a holiday party in Bedstuy where White Elephant began two hours late. I successfully tricked another attendee into explaining the rules to me in full, despite already knowing what White Elephant is.

• A purple Porsche was observed on N 6th street. Who owns this???

• A new running list has been started: “Places the cast of The Nanny visited.” So far:

  • S&P Lunch

Research ongoing. I plan to go to all of them.

• You didn’t hear it from me, but the payphone at Kellogg’s Diner is an excellent location for prank calls. No follow-up questions.

• MISSING: Cheese in my cheese curd at Rose Marie in Williamsburg. The meal was absolutely delightful, otherwise.

• Garlic has gone rogue on Bedford Avenue. Please keep any conspiracy theories to yourself until we know more. A Brooklyn vampire situation has not been ruled out.

• A Prospect Heights Hanukkah Party proving hot dog season is never over.

• Popup Bagels continues to test our tolerance.

“I read a positive mention of this business on Instagram and when I found their Driggs Avenue location was not too far away, I stopped by today to try a poppy seed bagel. Surprisingly, there is a three bagel minimum to purchase. I’m a native New Yorker, grew up in Brooklyn and have never seen a bagel place have a minimum. I walked out. (By the way, I don’t know what they do in Connecticut where this business originates but here in New York, you do not put all the different flavored bagels in one basket.)”

“Private equity bagels. No thank you.”

Case reopened.

• Williamsburg Winter Village has been described as “the next Willy Wonka Glasgow experience.”

• Williamsburg Music Hall is closing. This is genuinely sad. I retract my previous statement that it was a venue filled with the worst people you’ve ever met. You really don’t know what you’ve got until the landlord raises the rent.

• Grand Street Foodtown continues to celebrate its grand opening — now entering its second year.

• Some sort of offering was left overnight at McCarren Park.

• The old Superiority Burger location is now speaking in code. We do not know who this message is for, but it feels urgent.

Thanks for reading Field Notes.

Happy holidays. Stay curious, stay alert, and please, be nice.