Capitalism! Capitalism! Capitalism! who came up with this concept.They say life gives you lemons make lemonades,lemonade tena mnipatie miwa nitafune buana because the economy is not doing wonderfully.Every other day I wake up look at my 40 Kenyatta shillings Mpesa balance and hope that maybe over night I might have won the Sportpesa Jackpot or Just maybe Just maybe that bank I depend for my Salo like nameless has credited my account with an ungodly amount of money.Just like BTS I’m a dreamer and the dream is that the 40 bob would have met investors and grown on it’s own in the few hours I had put my soul to recharge.
Lupita said “All dreams are valid” mine might me be doing 12 years a slave of the matrix because the 40 Kenyatta shillings is still 40 Kenyatta shillings. The only other entity believing in me is Fuliza and she charges intrest for the faith.
Today I don’t look like my problems,I’m dressed like a King and as my hand hand slides through the door hole for me to press the Mindy padlock.The reflection on the window looks back at me with chewing a toothpick like it has opinions like Gachagua. Swali ni Moja G tutatoka block lini?
I ask this question everywhere.At the barber who rivals Mutahi ngunyi on political analytics and has opinions on the economy better than Githinji.At the jobless corner the boys have graduated from when we finish campus to when the economy stabilizes to a silence so loud that it speaks volumes.
From boomer parents to millenial siblings theories are thrown around.My Uncle says it’s consistency.The person telling me about consistency had a track record of 11 failed business and he always drank himslef to a stupor.
One of my friends says God timing is the best.Don’t get me wrong I believe with my whole chest but sometimes I feel like God has put me on “DND”.
Phases come and go.There is a cyrpto season where every guy became a miner for gold he had no knowledge about.Then came the forex season that had us posting graphs we learnt new words and old lessons.The online writing account you bought from Bernard and he vanished with you 40Gs.Then came the mutumba thrift hustle on instagram that had only your friends cheering you up with fire and heart emoji’s.
The brown envelope with your CV has been to the void and the void writes back to notify your application was unsuccesful but they will always have you in mind.Even when your CV is being used to serve Mandazi’s in the office.
It’s 2 in the am, I have let the bedbugs bite.
You are looking at the top of your bed sitter,your back on a warm mattress as you hear the neighbour’s baby cry through the wall thinner than the government’s promises,You do the math you already know the answer to.
You are mellow from thinking about how your mother has your Graduation picture framed up on the wall and she flexes to her fellow chama mates that he has a son in Nairobi doing something with his life and you cannot bring yourslef to explain what the things are.You think about everything at home you left like a prodigal son but you have no option of not making it despite the city trying to squeeze you.
And you say
“Tutatoka Block”
not “nitatoka” which means the block is a waiting room and everybody in the waiting room is family
So I ask you again
Tutatoka Block lini? When will we leave?
It might not be today,it might not be tommorrow
But the odds are not zero
Tutatoka.
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