New Year, Same Me

Hey there,

I made the decision late last year to be more public with my writing about money (scary!). I had a small marketing newsletter that went to friends, family, and clients but I suspected that more people could benefit from what was I was sharing.

Not because I am some money expert on a high horse but because I’m a regular-ass person who struggles with money because I too have to live under capitalism.

2024 for me felt like swirling in a tornado of financial uncertainty and chaos. Some of it was probably me, a lot of it was definitely the systems that run our world.

Most of the work I do with my clients is helping them unshame themselves, and realize that so much of what they struggle with around money isn’t actually their fault.

And yet I, as the professional money coach, still struggle to share some of my money hiccups out of the shame that “I should know better”.

So this newsletter, Money Secrets, is my attempt to share with less shame, in the hopes that it can help y’all as much as it helps me.

Here’s something I wrote last year about learning to budget all over again, that still feels relevant.

xo

Selomé

After my own money transformation, and working with several clients to change their relationship to money, I thought I had my money sh*t figured out.

Then I got fired.

I had savings (this wasn’t my first rodeo) and knew what my life cost so I thought managing my money would be straightforward.

I had no way of knowing the system I had set up for my money was about to crumble.

At this point I had been in 9-5 jobs for around seven years and while I had experienced periods of unemployment, they never lasted longer than a few months.

I picked up freelance work there and there while holding full-time jobs, but had no idea what it was like to depend on irregular income over a long period of time.

I had gotten used to consistent paychecks and had set up my budget (and bank accounts) as a complex interconnected web.

It was beautiful and efficient, like a Rube Goldberg machine, but only worked with the consistent input of an exact amount of income.

Once the consistent income dissolved, I found myself returning to a time-honored way of dealing with my money: complete denial.

I found myself mixing business and personal accounts, not sticking to any sort of budget, pulling money out of my savings willy-nilly to cover credit card payments, and not tracking my business expenses at all.

In short, it was a mess.

My mind constantly felt jumbled trying to keep straight which bills I had to pay when, and from which account, and with what money.

It took up a ton of my brain space and made doing my taxes this year a total nightmare.

It wasn’t until I was setting up my direct deposit for a part-time gig this spring (I fully support having side income even if you have a business!) that I realized I needed to completely overhaul how I handled my money.

I needed to stop holding on to the fantasy of my previous system and commit to building a new one.

One that prioritized my goals and removed the mental load while not depending on an exact number of income every month.

The new system isn’t as sexy as the old one, nor as aspirational.

I set a very modest percentage for building back up my savings, setting money aside for taxes, and am doing my best to plan ahead for big annual or quarterly expenses.

It’s not perfect, but it’s progress.

The lesson is how you relate to and manage your money will eternally be in flux.

Moving, entering or exiting a relationship or job, having a kid or starting a business will alter how you relate to money.

The work is in learning to ride the wave and stay open to change.

This is the work I do with clients, helping you create a system that actually works for you.

After all, the “perfect” budget or fanciest money app is useless if you avoid using it.

You get to meet yourself where you are.

🤔 If you’re feeling like this is the time to finally get your money sh*t together, my free Money Beliefs Masterclass is the perfect place to start. In just one hour, you’ll gain powerful clarity about what’s really driving your money behaviors.