Seems easy doesn’t it. Set a goal. Aspire to achieve something in your life and BANG….. the great idea suddenly becomes a dumb idea. The excitement wears off and is replaced with fears and doubts. So many obstacles to derail our success.
These emotions feel real and threatening. They strike us with fear and disable our progress. Otherwise we would just effortlessly sail across the finish line of goals. Setting goals takes ACTION and some HARD WORD. Just do the work!
As soon as you think goal, three things usually happen:
Stage 1. You start thinking (way too much). The endless mind chatter starts immediately, picks it apart, analyzing it, looking for flaws. Who are you to succeed? What are the chances of failure (again).? You are ultimately doomed as your mind collects evidence from past experiences. God help you if you share with your idea with a ‘dream killer’.
Stage 2. Your fear and doubt kicks in. The list is long - fear of failure, fear of looking like a fool, fear of what others will say, plus the big surprising one - actual fear of success.
As Joseph Nguyen says - Don’t Believe Everything You Think.
Another great read - to rewire your brain. Learn how to overcome anxiety, self-doubt & self-sabotage without needing to rely on motivation or willpower.
Stage 3. Obstacles and excuses appear.
Some obstacles are real and others are created by our thinking. Sometimes the path is blocked but there is always a solution and often it makes us stronger in the process of solving the problem.
Recommended reading: The Obstacle is the Way by Ryan Holiday
You can purchase Ryan’s collection of Stoic works at his independent bookstore - The Painted Porch
Understand that it is a normal process to follow these stages when setting a goal. If anything it’s a good indicator that you are actually onto something meaningful. Think about it; why else would your ego/mind/negative self turn up and try to talk you out of the idea?
The second thing to understand is the distinction between Expectations versus Reality. I don’t know who quoted ‘stress is the the difference between expectation and reality’ but it is so true. This struggle is what causes the pain and frustration. Just remember Stages 1, 2 and 3 are often only happening in your head (coming from the world’s biggest worrier).
So don’t let this nonsense in our heads stop us in our tracks. Examine the feelings at the different stages, acknowledge them and then tell them to take a back seat.
In summary:
When you have a THOUGHT about a meaningful goal, acknowledge the noise that wants to keep you small.
There will be loads of mental chatter as you start THINKING.
Notice how your excitement turns into fear and doubt.
Stop - what is your expectation versus reality?
Replace the negative with positive thoughts – slowly and consistently. You have got this!
The better strategy is to take positive action. Remember, the road is not straight, expect obstacles, bumps and detours.
Keep your eye on your goal and measure each progress step.
Only needs to make a few small changes, take action, move to next step, another small change, take action….. rinse and repeat.
Follow your own MAP 🗺️ – to navigate & explore Money, Abundance and Prosperity on your terms.
Thanks for being a legend and reading My MAP Project. This will continue to be a free newsletter but I need your support to pay it forward.
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