You're Not Lazy. You're Overwhelmed.

I’m so happy to be writing to you today. We’re just past the Spring Equinox, which marks the seasonal shift from dormancy to motion, burrowing to blooming. This doesn’t have to be some overnight, black-or-white transformation, where you suddenly need to always be doing something just because the sun now sets at 7:31pm.

I like to think that we can integrate the different seasons all throughout our day, in terms of allowing ourselves to ebb and flow with our energy, wants, and needs. You can have a wintry, introverted morning and a summery, extroverted evening within the same 12 hours. Energy levels are supposed to fluctuate. But this shift to spring is always felt in my body — I feel an annual wave of momentum, freshness. And then the mind comes in. Questioning if I’m making the right decision. Critiquing myself before I’ve even started. Complicating what should be straightforward tasks.

As people, we’re hardwired to do this in big and small ways — and especially now. I don’t need to explain the fact that we are collectively overwhelmed and overloaded with information right now. We all know this because we all feel it. When our bodies are in this state, the mind can’t possibly be quiet. When the body is flooded with noise, so are our thoughts.

This can manifest in big ways, like feeling totally numb and disempowered by the state of the world. And it also manifests in smaller, more mundane ways. The other week, I felt an urge to finally sort through my tiny but stuffed apartment pantry, and toss/replace the old stuff (I had a cumin bottle that was from 2017... if we are being specific here). An urge to sort through decade-old containers must be acted on fast because god knows it’s fleeting, and then I noticed my mind start to go off on some complicated tangent. But if I clean out the expired stuff, then I’ll need to order more things, and I don’t feel like spending money. So maybe I’ll just leave it all. But if I leave it all, I’ll need to deal with it later and th—

It sounds so meaningless as I type it, but I’ve been noticing this pattern in all facets of life: feel a desire to act, overthink it, feel paralyzed, and don’t act at all. It’s when the body wants to move, but we stop ourselves in our tracks by thinking too much about what those tracks should look like.

Like anything, there’s not a quick fix to this feeling, and it’s also not always something to fix at all. It’s an appropriate response to what’s happening. But what I’ve been doing is noticing this voice that complicates, acknowledge that it’s trying to protect, make things perfect, or feel in control in some way — and geeeently move it next to me. Thanks for trying to help out, but I’m going to keep things simple. Let’s just take one small step. It’s been a subtle shift, but a strong one, because it allows me to catch my over-complicating brain before it paralyzes me. As always, I’m not shaming myself for it or trying to get rid of this sticky voice — I’m just changing my relationship to it. I’m working with it, instead of against it.

In ARE YOU MAD AT ME?, I wrote about how we can’t heal our deepest, relational wounds by isolating ourselves in a room for the rest of our lives. We heal by showing our bodies new relationships and experiences that are safe. The same is true for this. We can’t move forward by just thinking about how we want to move forward. We can’t take a step by thinking again and again about what that next step should be. We can certainly reflect, but once that reflection starts to become rumination, it’s time to put the thinking to rest.

What have you been overthinking? What have you been wanting to do, but haven’t because it’s become a big deal in your head? And how can you simplify?

I can start before I feel ready.

I’m allowed to figure it out as I go.

I can bring the anxiety with me instead of waiting for it to disappear.

I’m allowed to be a beginner.

I can notice my thoughts without believing or listening to them.

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Whatever you’re feeling and navigating right now, I hope you can be easy with yourself, knowing that you’re handling more than the body can possibly process. Just focus on this: whatever is right in front of you.

Until next time,

♡ Meg

But wait, I have a workshop for you!

In the spirit of true healing = not just thinking, but actually feeling…. if you read my book and want to go even deeper with the material, I have a workshop for it! It’s 2.5 hours long, broken up into 7 segments. It’s pre-recorded so you can you watch it at your own pace, rewatch, repeat — and it’s yours to keep forever. Each segment ends with a guided mindfulness practice where we take what we just learned and actually practice it together. In other words: the workshop comes with 7 guided meditations!

You can view the workshop here. It’s been so wonderful to hear your positive reviews. Here’s just one of them!

Okay, bye for real now. Talk soon!