My Industry Origin Story: What’s a nice girl like you doing in a place like this?

I hope you had a cute Valentines Day. Thank you for coming out to my live stream last week. I had a ball! Its still early in the year! Its a good time to reintroduce myself and cut you a little slice of my mysterious backstory… ♥️

I decided introversion didn’t provide me with as much fun as I’d like to be having so it wouldn’t do any longer. I made a plan in my diary to deliberately force myself into situations that would throw me into the deep-end of being social so that I could practice at it. The more experiences I had, the more data I could gather, the more I could see the puzzle and eventually crack it.

I signed up for summer camps, auditioned for plays, got accepted into an art program at the museum, joined the swim team. Anything that would put me around my peers and wouldn’t give me the option to back out if The Shyness crept in. It was pretty awful at first. I would get overwhelmed and clam up when the spotlight came on me. But after a while of strategically putting myself out there, it became easier and easier until I was actually having the fun I predicted was out there. I have likened the experience to allowing yourself to get punched in the face and standing back up for another over and over again until it doesn’t hurt anymore. If you had asked me at 12, I would have told you I invented this method. I didn’t know that what I had concocted was called Exposure Therapy and that someone else already had dibs on that. My scientific trials taught me that anything can be solved, you just have to know how to show up for it (over and over and over again for a long, long time…) until you can see the puzzle.

By the time I got to high school, The Shyness wasn’t a looming issue any longer, but the concept of Boys was introduced to our heroine’s narrative. I was always told I was pretty but I didn’t understand it as it functioned in attraction. When I’d flirt with them, I started seeing up close how much my looks effected men on a profoundly supernatural level. It was delightful! I didn’t understand how to wield this ancient force I was playing with, I just knew I wanted more of it. So when I moved to Chicago in my 20’s, I decided to take it to the next level.

This way I could speedrun experimenting with and harnessing these new found powers of seduction that were growing inside me. No courtship, no apps, I could get straight to the…data. So I did what any armchair anthropologist in 2012 would do: I called the number of a seedy ad in the back of a newspaper and got myself a job interview at the friendly, neighborhood dungeon.

There was an elaborate security system at the door which opened up into a small lobby with too tall trees1 flanking an expensive desk. Two stunning older women in cocktail dresses and full smokey eye (at 9am) were posing at the desk to make their first impression on me. They carried themselves with the exact demeanor you would imagine.

“We haven’t had a tall girl in awhile…” They looked me up and down with dollar signs in their eyes and started debating amongst themselves what my new name would be. They eventually landed on Diana, a name they enthusiastically bestowed upon me because, and I quote, “It makes you sound blacker!” My first pseudonym and I didn’t even get to pick it out myself.

They gave me a tour of the facility. It was several stories with each playroom given its own unique theme. They plopped me on the couch in the 2nd floor parlor and gave me a stack of erotica to read. At the time, I was so invested in wanting to do a good job that I devoured it all thinking the info would come in handy at some point, but in retrospect they just didn’t have anything for me to do and wanted to stash me away for a few hours. There was this story that referred to a vagina as “my little artichoke” and I was so offput by that criminal misuse of language that the term is still lodged under my skin to this day and now its your problem too.

One of the lower level Mistresses came through the parlor dragging a man on a leash and leading him into a cage built into the wall. She came over to me and quietly introduced herself before scurrying off. I didn’t know yet, but this girl would become my good friend and eventual roommate, which was strictly forbidden. The thing that makes this place different from any other dungeon I eventually worked at is that the staff never breaks character. You were not allowed to give your real name to other girls or see each other outside of work. You were each “Mistress” at all times. We were not allowed to speak throughout the day other than to say “Yes, ma’am”, “Thank you, ma’am”, “Can you help me sterilize the anal hooks, ma’am?” If you didn’t top off every sentence with a “ma’am” at the end, you would be corrected by management.2

After spending hours alone reading, one of the Head Mistresses suddenly bursts into the parlor and ushers me to the basement. I entered an elaborate medical examination playroom with two established Mistresses in matching latex catsuits smiling while hovering over their victim. It also turns out I was not the only new prospect that day. Another hopeful who had been tucked away in another room reading all day just like I was was brought in as well. She looked just as surprised to see me as I’m sure I did to see her. Our new bosses threw us both into the scene like it was The Colosseum and asked for a report back from our elders. Winner take all.

It was so sudden, I didn’t exactly know what to do. Fortunately, I had taken those summer camp acting classes, so I was able to call upon my inner theater kid and pull out the performance of my life. The second I opened my mouth, the experienced girls gave me a knowing wink and encouraged me to keep it up. Not only was I a natural but I also had fun! A lot of fun! My long lonely study day ended in an action-packed spy roleplay complete with an alien impregnation subplot. I walked out that day with my new name on the schedule and never seeing the other girl I was pitted against again.

The plan was to only do it for a summer. The extra cash was a consultation prize, I was there for the data. The life experience. The XP. I had no idea at the time that I was kicking off a lucrative career that I’m (still) passionate about and fascinated by. Its worked out in the coolest way. I’ve built a life I love because I made a habit early on out of getting out of my comfort zone. I can’t say I saw life going this way, but it turns out summer camp made me good at improvising!