A devastating blow

A just let me know that she needs our friendship to end indefinitely.

The three closest friends I’ve ever had gone in the span of 18 months

A devastating blow to an already fragile position

Ever more evidence that life is painful and less reason to go on

Where do I go from here, completely alone

Even my parents can’t accept me

This was the one relationship I was really holding on to. Perhaps that’s why it was bound to go this way.

Do I drink? No I don’t want to ruin everything else I have. I would be better off dead.

I have no god or AA to turn to anymore. This is loneliness that I have never known. There is no meaning or beauty in my existence.

The only escape I see from here is by my own hand. Everything behind me is in ruins. It is impossible to imagine it ever being as good as it were. It could be years or it could be never.