I ignore him. I walk farther. Still he follows. I pull out my phone, hit record, and start yelling at him to Walk away! Leave me alone! He stays silent, slowly creeping even closer to me, only a couple feet away from me now. He’s smiling, trying to read a patch on my loud, pink and purple, trans punk jacket with silver studs on the shoulders. I decide to walk toward two men also waiting on the platform, hoping that will scare this white male stalker away. One of the white men I’m walking toward is wearing large headphones. We shared the same bus ride to the station. Maybe Mr. Headphones remembers me.
Mr. Headphones looks at me recording the stalker, me still angrily ordering the stalker to leave me alone, and walks over. He gently guides the stalker away, and appears to give the stalker a talk. As they walk away I say “thank you,” hearing that my “thank you” sounds angry. I hope Mr. Headphones knows how genuinely thankful I am for his intervention. Because without it I seriously don’t know what I could have done. I’ve been in this situation a few times before. The last time the man was yelling shit at me, following me, and no one in the park intervened. Even when I sat down at a public table where a man was seated. They were all silent. The time before that my wife and I hid in a cafe as an angry man stalked us down Church St. Another time my wife and I had to walk towards a crowd of people picnicking in the park to deter the person from further stalking. Yet another time my wife had to climb up a rock wall while we were tide-pooling in Monterey. He tried climbing up after her, but his old ass couldn’t. She was grateful for wearing boots that day.
I get on BART— sans stalker—to join a protest against the mayor during City Hall’s SF Pride flag raising ceremony. It’s no secret that mayor Lurie’s budget aims to cut millions and millions of dollars from programs that help the most marginalized and vulnerable survive, including cuts to HIV funding.
2SLGBTQIA+ people and allies, some also involved in San Francisco’s People’s Budget Coalition (PBC), quickly organized this protest to defend HIV funding. I have been following the work of PBC, disgusted by mayor Lurie’s proposed cuts to the tune of $100 million+ to live-saving services including the closure of three clinics!
About 30 people showed up with protest signs, pots and pans to drown out the actual flag raising from the mayor’s balcony.
However, to our surprise, the San Francisco Pride Band is in formation on the stairs underneath the balcony. A friend at the protest doesn’t remember this band being here for previous SF Pride flag ceremonies. Neither do I. We speculate this is a last minute addition by city hall to drown out our protest during the balcony ceremony. Without us protestors being present, the band has no one else to perform to, which make the situation a little awkward. But we inform the band why we are protesting, letting them know this is about the mayor and HIV funding, not against them nor against Pride. In the wait for the mayor, supervisors and participants to appear from above, the band treats us with a friendly, great performance.
Uniting with the LGBTQ+ community to confront & shatter SF Gov’s illusion that they’re supporting us while pulling the funding rug from underneath our feet makes me feel euphoric. I’ve done my fair share of solo confrontations during public comment and that often leaves me feeling sad about the state of things. To be fair, there are people who publicly confront our local gov regarding their ill treatment of the LGBTQ+ community. It hasn’t been often but it’s ramping up this year.
Our government has been offloading its responsibility to non-profits to care for us constituents, shackling non-profits into obedience. Generally you won’t find a non-profit risking being accused of being political, so their pleas are directed to the public for support, and not against the mayor for defunding them, potentially suffering retribution too. Though this year, probably because the stakes are so high, I’ve seen the most direct messaging from non-profits to the mayor than I have in recent years.
Still, we mustn’t wait to act. Whether that’s by creating an independent, alternative systems of care outside the bounds of government ties, or demanding the continued funding for essential programs these non-profits are providing, we all have to do something. Last year I wrote Billionaire’s Budget: Part I to educate others and express myself. This year, I’m using less words and more yelling.
I volunteer to lead the protest chants. Moments before the mayor appears, an organizer from the People’s Budget Coalition explains why we’re protesting and hands me the pink megaphone. Government officials and LGBTQ+ participants crowd the balcony as I yell a verse followed by the crowd repeating as they noisily slam their cookware together.
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Mayor Lurie, you can't hide,
We can see your greedy lies!
Mayor Lurie hear us say,
Fund queer lives, not display!Supervisors looks down on us with fake bright smile. Some people on the balcony taunt us, one even making a jerk-off motion with his hand. Law enforcement look rather happy posing for photos. We have a good run of chanting and noise-making until the actual Pride flag is raised. The band kicks back into action, drowning out our sidewalk rebellion.
The formal ceremony is happening in front of the mayor’s office. The mayor is at the podium with a full house. I take note that the trans flag has returned to the flag line-up behind the podium. I was very vocal last year about how the mayor took away the trans flag for last year’s SF Pride flag raising ceremony.
On the side opposite the ceremony, in the middle of mayor Lurie’s remarks, we chant “No Cuts!” until the Sheriffs kick us out under threats of arrest. As we approach the door to exit, a bottleneck forms because an elder in a wheelchair happens to be stationed at the bottom of the stairs, next to the security checkpoint. Only one person can pass at a time, which angers the Sheriffs.
“Just get the fuck out!” one of them next to me yells.
“You get the fuck out!” I reflexively yell back as I carefully walk through the narrow exit.
Back outside, we gather. A couple people left the ceremony after our protest, and join us. They realized they can’t stand by the mayor while he’s defunding HIV services, amongst so many other things. People worry about the divisions this will cause. I counter any person with the same worry, What about the division caused standing with an ultra wealthy man who is defunding social programs for Black and brown communities? While he’s making homeless people’s lives hell, of which trans people were at least 9% last year? While he’s making survival harder for HIV+ people? While he’s closing clinics for youth and seniors? He’s even rolling the Department on the Status of Women into the Human Rights Commission (HRC). Not just that, he’s further defunding the HRC by 32%, the same commission that also houses the Office of Transgender Initiative and the Dream Keeper Initiative! All while giving the wealthy tax breaks and ever-increasing the police budget and surveillance under Trump’s America?
Why aren’t those LGBTQ+ people called divisive as quickly as we are?
The least any LGBTQ+ person can do, who feels forced into standing with the mayor, is show us their support one way or another. That is possible and actually helpful.
But if they choose to attack us instead, I ask, Who is fighting for whom, exactly?
You can send an email to mayor Lurie and the supervisors and tell City Hall: Find the money. Restore the cuts. No cuts. No layoffs. Fund OUR San Francisco.
I recommend following SF People’s Budget Coalition on IG. They are also on Facebook and YouTube
You can also get involved with the SF AIDS Foundation’s HIV Advocacy Network here.
PS- By 5pm the same day, the Pride flag was taken down and the American flag was flying high.
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