Well, well, well, what a week. With the easing of Trump’s tariffs, the Panicans have scooted past caring about the volatile markets and have moved on to panicking about getting a deported foreign MS-13 member shipped back to Maryland.
Democrats are taking the mission so seriously that some are making taxpayer funded vacations out of it!
I hope someday we will know what it’s like to have Democrat elected officials who care more about the constituents in their community than they do about the criminals that pass through it.
But let’s move on from the ‘Maryland Man’ and onto our favorite ‘Delaware Man’ who resurfaced this week to show us just how well he’s doing.
Here’s some highlights from Joe Biden’s speech this week (including the part where he starts talking while the music is blaring):
Boy, is he missed! There was nothing quite like having a comatose leader leading the way.
He’s in great shape other than what is listed as an “abnormality” of “scaring [sic] on the right ear.” I wonder how that happened?
Harvey Weinstein, appearing in court for his #MeToo retrial, asking the photographer if she ever thought about being in front of the camera.
President Trump greeting the President of El Salvador, flabbergasted that another world leader dared to show up to the White House in a shirt without a collar.
Georgia Senator Raphael Warnock, attending an anti-DOGE rally, protesting the elimination of taxpayer funding for professionally printed protest signs.
The President and Vice President, JD Vance, discretely discussing whether or not they should go “Full Zelenskyy” on this guy.
Congressman Steve Scalise on the floor of the New York Stock Exchange, watching the market move in real time based on insider trades he’s executing on his phone.
President Trump excited to see the ring he ordered from Temu arrived from China before his tariffs hit.
President Trump suggesting the El Salvadorian President make prisoners in CECOT learn his TikTok dance.
NSA Director Mike Waltz checking his pulse after almost dying from embarrassment as Jeffrey Goldberg entered the room.
Mark Zuckerberg, re-energized by plugging his finger into the car charger on his way to Capitol Hill to testify that he’s not a robot.
RFK Jr speaking at a cabinet meeting, listing McDonald’s French Fries as a food Americans need to avoid.
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