👋 I wrote a children’s book

Greetings from Brooklyn. It’s me, Jen Glantz.

One of my secret projects for the year is finally out of my brain and into the world.

Gemma and I read 15–20 children’s books a day. Sometimes more. We have so many that we love. Children’s books are so fun and whimsical and silly. Some of the most popular ones out there hardly make any sense at all, and some enrage me so much that I have developed full-blown grudges against fictional fish. My Rainbow Fish rant really brings the mood down at parties.

BUT SHE GIVES AWAY HER BEAUTY!!! SHE GIVES IT AWAY!!!

Anyway…..

In January, I decided that one of my secret projects for the year was going to be writing a children’s book that we could add to our own bookshelves.

I want Gemma to know her mama as a writer, and right now, a lot of what I write is totally outside her realm of care. Plus does she really need to know about how a psychic told me I’d never find love or about a bride who five minutes before her wedding locked me in a room and told me she hated the groom?

So I thought why not write something she can read? Or, more accurately, something I can read to her 47 times in a row?

I’ve written three books so far: two published by wonderful traditional publishers and my most recent one self-published through a publishing company I created called: For Gemma.

But the logistics of a children’s book were a bit trickier. This was something I had to learn the hard way through hiring, firing, changing my mind, trying to do everything myself, realizing I absolutely could not do everything myself, and wobbling back to square one more than once.

Along with my secret-project goals, I decided to try on a new mindset this year:

I need to stop talking myself out of doing the stuff I’m actually thrilled by and just do it.

No matter what.

Truly, there are MILLIONS of children’s books out there. Why couldn’t I write one too? So I did. And it’s here! TA-DA!

Meet Gemma and Goofy’s Great Ducky Adventure.

It’s a book inspired by the trips we take almost every Sunday to Central Park and the very silly love story between Gemma (the toddler), Goofy (the dog), and Ducky (the one toy Goofy has had and loved since she was a tiny puppy).

But in an effort to use my little space in your inbox to be transparent, honest, hopefully helpful, and maybe even encouraging if there’s something you’ve been secretly wanting to make too, here is every step I took to write and publish my first children’s book.

LOUD EXHALE.

OK, let’s go.

When you write a book, you have to decide why you’re doing it.

If your answer is fame and fortune, I get it. You are human. You are deserving of both. But also know that reason alone probably isn’t enough.

Because fame and fortune can come from books, but most of the time they don’t.

Take it from someone who won “Most Likely to Be Famous” in her high school yearbook and is STILL trying to climb to the top of that ladder.

See: book proposals shot down by publishers and a book that underwhelmed its publisher so much that I once built a fortress out of 50 copies I bought with my own money so I could hide inside of it for yearrrrrssss.

But if you’re writing a book because you desperately want to tell the story, no matter how many people read it? Great news. Keep going. Your wildest dreams will come true.

Writing is lonely.If there were a soundtrack to my writing sessions, it would sound very similar to me sitting on the toilet dealing with extreme constipation.

But you just have to try. And try some more.

And then, naturally, the exact sentence you’ve been searching for will come to you when you are nowhere near a computer or a pen. That is when you must stop everything you are doing and RUN to get it all out.

Now that feels more like diarrhea.

This was the hardest part for me. Like, soooo hard.

I self-funded this book from an account I have called “book money,” which contains every dollar I’ve ever made from all of my books. IT’S NOT MILLIONS, OKAY?

So I couldn’t hire some famous illustrator. At first, the bargain girl inside of me decided I would simply illustrate the book myself.

One small problem: I cannot draw a stick figure without people thinking it’s a lollipop.

So I turned to ChatGPT at first, and that was a horrible, no-good, absolutely-not idea for what I wanted this book to be. Then I turned to Fiverr, which also didn’t work for me because I kept running into people using AI.

Finally, I said: NO AI. I WANT A HUMAN!

I hired a company that helps with storyboarding and illustrations for $2,000 and ended up firing them after they took two months to show me a design concept that looked like AI. Back to square one.

Then I stalked Facebook groups and searched Behance, a platform where designers and illustrators showcase their work, until I finally found my person.

I paid under $1,600 for the book to be illustrated and formatted and for the cover to be designed. That included both the ebook and paperback versions.

And finally, the characters in my head started looking like the characters in my book.

You can absolutely go down the traditional publishing route, but that’s a whole other ball game and an entirely different blog post. I didn’t do that for this book.

I self-published because my true goal was very simple: I wanted this book to exist for Gemma. And, hopefully, for anyone else who wants a fun, silly children’s book on their shelf.

I LOVE bookstores. They are my safe place. But for this project, it didn’t matter to me if the book was sitting on a table inside one.

Maybe I’ll regret saying that later. Probably. But not today!

I published the book using Amazon KDP. It’s free to use, relatively easy to navigate and the book can go live on Amazon within days of being approved.

Amazon takes a big cut because they sell the book, process the payment, print the book, and ship it. So I only make a couple of bucks per copy. I’m okay with that.

If you want a different route, services like IngramSpark can help make your book available for wider distribution, including to bookstores and libraries.

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This part made every single hour I spent working on this project worth it. I didn’t tell Gemma, Goofy, or Adam about the book. It was a complete secret.

And when the first copy arrived and I showed it to them, they morphed into full-body smiles.

Goofy’s facial expression remained mostly the same because she is a dog, but I know deep down she was absolutely stunned by her literary debut.

We’ve already read the book approximately 48 times. A DREAM!!!!

And now I finally get to tell you about it too.

Gemma and Goofy’s Great Ducky Adventure is whimsical and silly and sweet. It’s about friendship and adventure and one extremely important Ducky.

I’m really proud of it.

But more than anything, it feels so good to have a secret project that lived inside my head for eight months finally exist in the world.

So if you have a little kid in your life, need a birthday gift, want something new for your bedtime-book rotation, have a dog who is emotionally attached to one toy, or simply want to support this very tiny publishing adventure of mine, I would be so grateful if you picked up a copy of Gemma and Goofy’s Great Ducky Adventure.

AND of course, the author in me, asks that you leave a review on Amazon!!! It helps the book get discovered!

Truly, every single copy means something to me. Because somewhere in Brooklyn, there’s a little girl flipping through a book about herself, her dog, and her dog’s beloved Ducky, knowing her mama made it for her.

And that was the whole reason I wanted to do this in the first place ❤️

I have two more secret projects I wanted to finish by the end of the year.

Project #2 gets exposed next week. Project #3… might not make it across the finish line by December 31. But even if it doesn’t, working on these weird little ideas that excite me has been one of the best parts of my year.

So my final words for you are obvious slaps in the face I literally give myself at 6am every day:

There are millions of books out there. There’s still room for yours.

Take care of yourself this week (ilysm).

Jen Glantz

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This BOOK! It’s sooo worth the hype! It’s a great audiobook to listen to but if that’s not your thing, the pacing and the plot makes the book a true page-turner. It pulled me out of a reading funk!

We’re a big fruit family and these are great to keep in the car or in your purse when you’re craving a pear or apple but don’t have any fresh ones around.

A fun game to keep on the coffee table or on a shelf for a moment when you’re feeling a tinge of boredom.

Finally the Bride (book) / Finally the Bride (audiobook!!) / Gemma and Goofy Children’s Book / Newlywed Card Game / Over 100+ wedding tools

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By the end of summer, it will feel sooo good to be able to say these three things:

1. I finally did that

2. I finally started working on that

3. I finally went on that adventure

With a few weeks left, all of this is totally doable.

Pick:

• One thing you need to cross off your to-do list that you’ve been putting off since January, like scheduling all your doc appointments for the year or dropping off ten bags of clothes you want to donate.

• One thing you want to start doing/working on. You don’t have to finsih this you can simply take the very first step. It’s soooo freeing to just start something that’s been scary or overwhelming to do.

• Go on an adventure or learn how to do that new hobby or spend a Saturday treating yourself to a “yes” day. This doesn’t have to be expensive or include travel anywhere. It just need to be special and something you’ve wanted to do.

I’m a writer and professional bridesmaid (yes, that’s a real job), and Brooklyn mom who has been oversharing on the internet for more than a decade!

I write about the things we’re all trying to figure out: work, relationships, money, motherhood, getting older, starting over, and all the awkward stuff in between.

You’ll also find weird life experiments, things I’m loving, and whatever is currently taking up too much space in my brain.

I’m here to make your Monday a little lighter, more interesting, and less lonely.

LET’S HANG OUT SOME MORE:

📚 Meet me in the pages: My books are full of stories, career chaos, life lessons, and plenty of oversharing.

💌 Scroll the archives: Hundreds of newsletters filled with stories, advice, experiments, recommendations, and SO much more.

👋 Come hang: On Instagram for the everyday chaos, behind-the-scenes moments, and everything that doesn’t make it into this newsletter.

Tiny favor:

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