14/1/21 I Miss Youth

i miss youth, frivolous youth. freedom like firecrackers, like lightning bugs glinting in the nighttime. pop rocks on the tongue, sun bleached hair, carefree. warm water to rush over your skin, mud + dirt caked. sweetness to caress your lips while the moon shines above. grass — itchy, fun, dirty but playful. the power to create & destroy, right there at your fingertips. i love the feeling of those stage lights on me. a little moldable doll. earthworms, lady bugs, caterpillars – i just want to feel one w/the earth. take a photo to commemorate. desperate for social interaction, i crave more. how good it feels to laugh & smile freely. blowing double bubble bursts & pops; pizza, cake, birthday candles. shiny, shimmering, clacking glamour. early mornings & golden hour naps. the plight to save every baby bird. before you fully feared being you. comfort in your father's arms; love in your mother's presence. just want to help. just want to be liked. pop music & games. rain or shine. snow cones when you win. things weren't so serious back then. when ambitions were alive & you were rife w/energy. fear in the darkness. before love consumed you. sucking your thumb for comfort. crying when there were no words. purple monkeys around the room – fever trips & plushies; rock walls, waves, sandy shores. the music, the creativity – it flowed then. before your judgment was so raw. simple, wholesome you. hearts all over everything. cats! femininity & masculinity. at times, unabashed. but you always looked to the stars & wondered if there was more.

Submitted Anonymously

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