[A note: Paid subs, please scroll all the way down for treats as a thank you: an unpacking video, a workout you can do anywhere, my favorite secondhand luxury watch dealer — and some home news!]
We have more summer! But, I suddenly got hit with a case of longing for … back to school? The pull of nostalgia is real. I never have fall or winter, by my own design! And I’m relatively immune to the lure of fall fashion, sweater weather, etc. etc. But I saw this ONE skirt and it opened a well of feelings. Took me back to 1984 and this Esprit sweater I bought over the summer that I was convinced would unlock my entire FALL PERSONA! The anticipation and excitement and this idea of fresh-page-clean-slateness, the idea that you can just change who you are, unlock a host of possibilities, fire the reaches of your imagination, that idea is what fashion and style do for me.
In that spirit, I put together a little list of 12 things that gave me those feelings. Things that give a full VIBE, possibilities, fall’s fresh-start magic, but also that could be worn right now. Here’s that little Boutique. Hope you like it.
Ok, so. Once upon a time, I would dress to show off my body and “get a man.” And then I remember back in the earliest Man Repeller days I really felt this idea: If your outfit repels men, chances are, it’s really goooood. Because men are often (and this is reductive but for the sake of a point) confused by cool things when it comes to women’s style. What does dressing for the female gaze mean? Maybe dressing in things that make a cool woman at the Museum of American American History come up to me and say “I love your outfit” and also “game sees game.” And I love those moments. But I don’t think seeking that goes into choosing what I wear either.
We’re staying in a vacation rental for two weeks with no full length mirror. And it’s given me a chance to home in on does make me feel like an outfit is “done.” I think it’s no one’s gaze — not even my own! I don’t actually need to see it. I feel it. If this isn’t your first Tuesday newsletter you know I call this feeling “Lofted Settledness,” and that I evaluate my own looks on whether I achieved it. This week sans mirror got me really looking at the things that make Lofted Settledness happen for me.
How do you know when an outfit hits for you?
Here’s what I learned . . .
… ok, the Takeaways this week:
This belt. Again. Ok I’m sorry; that’s direct and specific. But I need to share joy with you, and this belt has been singlehandedly MAKING OUTFITS WORK. We used to want to buy the world a Coke. I’d like to buy this world an Emme Parsons vegetable leather belt.
Weird color combos do so much heavy lifting. I could be wearing the most basic of basics; just f’ng things up with a weird combo can instantly make me feel that something-is-happening feeling.
Start training yourself not to always go with the black/white/navy option. At the recommendation of Kelly Klein I picked up this Still Here henley tee, and instead of my instinctive white I kinda forced myself to do the lemon color, which is a weird dirty-acid mustard-green. It will do so much more for me.
Love everything you own, including the “basics”: I have said it way too many times and my friend Asta recently said it too.
MONDAY
house hunting in the rain, lunch at a cute place, and WFH
Oak and Luna Compass Necklace - has my initials and Jim + Jack’s!
Secondhand Ulla Johnson Joni dress (it ties at the top) - size 6 on Poshmark (BTW it has lots of size leeway, FYI; mine is a 0 and it fit before I lost weight too.) Size 4. Brochu Walker makes a great alt, on sale, in a range of sizes.
Guest in Residence cashmere ringer tee - trust me on this one; upgrading a ringer tee to cashmere is a game changer. I think it’s a 4 season forever item. I don’t know the brand but here’s a Merino option on sale for 60 bucks that looks too cute to ignore.
Phoebe Philo green flip flops are sold out online … Larroude’s option … Ithese for $25, the color, lines.
Lofted Settledness? Almost but not quite. I like how it looks, but the dress was a lot of length + volume in the rain, plus I didn’t tie it tight and at one point it almost fell completely off. Zut alors!
TUESDAY
exploring Bristol, plus cocktails + dinner w/the crew
Gifted Paulette padded shoulder top
Secondhand Tory Burch earrings — great comp; use code HEYMRSSOLOMON15
Perforated Adidas Stan Smith sneakers (I went down a 1/2 size, FYI)
The Horse pouch (a gift I chose, and I am really appreciating what I wanted it to do in this color, which is be that bridge between brights plus white or black, that extra unexpected complication I need to feel good.)
Lofted Settledness? Yes. I love a big white earring always and this dress is so easy. Plus I was comfy in sneakers under there! Would not have felt the same without the bag; amazing how much a weird color combo can do.
WEDNESDAY
house hunting, coffee shop, unpacking
Louboutin flats, winner of my “comfortable and modern black flats search” — and + - finally have a great comp!
Tibi shorts … and a Toast alt. some of the vibe, size up. Obv different, but have swagger. In other news, I want these now. Or maybe since we are moving into fall, we want a cool cropped khaki pant instead. The knee detail! The copy says these feel like “the cool side of the pillow.”
Secondhand Bottega men’s old hooded acidic tee … and a host of acid options at all prices + sizes … (Actually, this Still Here henley tee would have worked here too!)
Theory men’s sweater — cotton + linen blend, which I like because it’s airyyyyy (a gift I chose)
Valentino belt — another great option. And this feels worth trying; great price.
Lofted Settledness? Yes. It’s the colors - the turq belt, citrine tee, grayish-bluish bag that worked for me.
THURSDAY
WFH, and being on vacation
The Row shorts, which you def don’t need to buy… Thanks, Ref!
Nomasei Flip flats (a gift I selected)
Lofted Settledness? Yes. Weird colors again. Clashing strange reddish tones of sweater and shoe. The necklace is one of my summer essentials at this point.
FRIDAY
errands, then WFH in our common area, packing, doing stuff around the house
past season Tibi navy terry shorts like these; lovely alt here. And for less, Cozy Earth.
secondhand R13 shredded plaid shirt, more options here — new, here.
Pearls tee (it’s an Australian skateboard brand!)
Vintage Prada Sport sunglasses made into glasses
Phoebe Philo pace runner sandals and here’s an “alt” that’s more … “the original”
Rabanne bag - LOVE this secondhand alt, which is expensive but a lot less. This is perfect at $212. Handmade on Etsy - I would ask them to have no sequin along the top, only the bottom!
Lofted Settledness? Yes. What works for me with this relatively simple big shorts + tee is tying that shirt for shape w/o losing the low-key ness and bringing the friction of the necklaces and embellishment on the bag.
night
went to a clam shack
Chelsea Von Mach CVM jeans with adjustable waist - I am in a medium
Necklaces as above plus lariat from At Present (use HEYMRSSOLOMON15)
Dolce Vita thong sandals under there — keeping the jeans off the ground - these turned out to be really comfortable
Lofted Settledness? Yes. A case of the Kitchen Sink Neutrals. Navy, gray, 2 shades of brown, bits of white. The jeans are a new brand from a new friend I made in LA and I am so excited for her. They are super comfy and you can pull this elastic at the waist to adjust. Rihanna has a pair!
SATURDAY
going out for pizza
Reformation shorts, size M
Gucci glasses (new)
Lofted Settledness? Yes! I love the non-match of the brown and black, white and ivory. I am obsessed with these pieces. I dropped a scoop of ice cream on the shorts. Because I’m me.
SUNDAY
relaxing, grazing, reading papers, going for a walk
And here’s a little demo of what I did to make these pieces together slightly more “something”:
everything already linked except:
And the arm situation…
Cartier Love bracelet (from 1st husband), nail bracelet (from my husband), and Trinity bracelet (secondhand)
Jenny Bird bangle — that opens so it can be small, yay! One of a set of two, Wendy Duffy wears the other one!
Ross Simons 14k gold plated chain, which is so good, withstands my showers and is like $63 rn.
Starling diamond bezel bracelet (one of our readers got this as a friendship bracelet with her daughter; I love thatttttt)
Merci fabric floral medal bracelet from my friend Christian Botefuhr
vintage Rolex Air King *
Night: going to a lobster/ice cream shack
Oak and Luna engraved compass necklace (my initials and J’s for Jim + Jack)
past season Tibi Winslow sweatpants; current here
Tibi tank is virtually sold out; you could play around with this; I’d size up. Or maybe we (yes, me too) are ready for this situation.
secondhand Miu Miu sunglasses made into glasses
Lofted Settledness? Yes! Tucking/belt created a shape that was the Lofted Settledness unlock for me.
Now. Here is last week’s Package Room:
I’ll put the next one up on Youtube this week and send that link through to notes/chat.
For access to my weekly finds and cravings, follow HMS here on ShopMy
Now for the paid folks, here’s my Rolex resource, house news, unpacking, and your IRL workout video:
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