Presence is a Living Inheritance...

Every time people meet my daughter Madison, they are stopped in their tracks in awe of the way that she communicates.

They are shocked by her manners, her ability to articulate, and her nonverbal expressions.

And this makes me sad.

Because the way my 12-year-old communicates shouldn’t be some shocking phenomenon.

I am incredibly proud of my daughter. She is the most extraordinary person I know.

But the people who meet her, who are so impressed by her basic communication skills, are drawing a stark contrast between what they see in Madison and what they are used to interacting with every day.

And it makes me wonder how much of what we have learned over the years is actually getting passed down to our children???

You say you are doing it for her.

All of the late nights, the hard work, the dedication and commitment to building your business.

The personal development, the therapy, the self-help books.

At the end of the day, you are doing it all to give your kids what you didn’t have.

What you didn’t get to experience.

You do it because you want to be the BEST possible parent you can be for her.

Sacrifice after sacrifice to get further faster, to achieve more, so we can provide a better life for our families.

But… is that what’s actually happening?

Or, are we just giving away more of ourselves and leaving the next generation with no real roadmap?

Our intentions are GOOD… but sometimes things get lost in translation.

Most of us are not reflecting on the actual impact our presence (or lack thereof) is having on our children firsthand… and in the pursuit of financial wealth, we give up REAL wealth.

Our generation is the generation of personal growth.

We are all therapied-up.

We attend the conferences, we invest in the coaching, we learned how to make money from home (or from anywhere, really).

And all the while, while our generation was so busy doing all of those things, the next generation has been left behind.

At a certain point we have to ask ourselves:

Did we say that we were building something for our children’s “inheritance,” meanwhile stealing the very best qualities that they could possibly inherit from us?

Because the only true gift our children really want from us is presence, unconditional love, and an upbringing that supports them growing into the amazing human they’re capable of becoming.

That requires emotional capacity and emotional availability.

Not a financial inheritance.

IMO, it’s time for a new success paradigm.

One that prioritizes PRESENCE over financial success.

One that prioritizes modeling a FAITH LIFE over the material things that we normally pass on to our children.

An inheritance that starts from the day our children are born and lasts for the rest of their life, based on the bond that we build with them, the time that we spend with them, and the emotional presence that we gift to them.

Doing “more for our families” is not just about the financial reward.

I am someone who grew up without the financial abundance that I have in our family today.

I grew up in a family where there was no money, and now I’m raising a daughter in a world where there’s lots of it. So, I’ve seen both sides of the coin.

And I can tell you that Madison would be just as happy if we were raising her and had absolutely nothing, given the parenting investment that Billy and I have made in her.

From the day she was born, we’ve been extremely intentional about not having nannies, not having babysitters, doing all of the parenting ourselves, and being fully PRESENT in her life.

And that’s why everywhere we go, every time she meets people, they’re so impressed by her. We’ve poured our time, our development, our growth into HER.

Trust me, I am not coming to you as some perfect parent who has it all figured out.

I have felt the guilt that many entrepreneurial parents have felt after a long day of spending the majority of it on the phone.

This is something I have to work toward constantly, and I’m writing this because I understand how hard it is to show up and build businesses while also making sure that we are equally pouring into the ones who matter most.

All this is easier said than done, which is why sometimes we need the accountability and community to remind us (and share creative ways that they are getting their children involved and keeping presence a priority).

But most business communities are solely focused on GROWTH and nothing else.

They don’t talk about the guilt that comes at night after bedtime, or the option to grow slower on purpose, or how to build a company with a kid on your lap.

That’s why every annual member of Founder Girl gets a seat at our next Mom’s Mastermind on August 19th at 5pm EST.

Upgrade NOW!

This is for moms building real companies with all of the demands that go with that… but who don’t want to hand over their PRESENCE 24/7 to hit the next revenue goal.

Building a company while raising children is a specific kind of lonely (especially when you’ve put yourself in a space where most big names are convinced that you can’t actually do both, and that in order to grow, you have to be okay with missing important life milestones.)

I disagree, and it’s why I am cultivating this community of parents.

I am hosting this virtually for entrepreneurial moms who want to come together and talk through all things parenting while building businesses, raising the next generation and equipping them with tools beyond just money.

If that’s a room you want to be in, upgrade to annual to get access. We would love to have you!

Now… when I feel my business start to eat at the parts of life that it shouldn’t, I usually take some time to sit with a few questions that help me get back on track. Hopefully, you find them helpful as well!

Don’t shut the door on your children.

And what I mean by that is allow them in your office.

Allow them to listen to you teach, speak, to lead calls, to make decisions.

Let them have a window into what you’re building, and even be part of building it with you.

Instead of trying to build your business and then make time for your children, integrate your children into learning alongside you from the beginning, into being a part of what you’re creating.

Madison and I have been able to bond so much over the years this way, from the early days where she sat on my lap during live launches, to my events where she speaks side by side on stage with me, to the events I attend that she attends right along with me.

She’s always been welcomed into my so that she can learn and study what I’m doing first hand, model it in her own life in whatever way makes sense for her in the future, and have something to look up to.

I always say that you’ll never regret your business growing more slowly because you put your family first.

You’ll be amazed at how much they will learn just by being in your presence, and how much closer you will grow by allowing them in the door.

-Kelly