As people hit the stores and the shopping sites for Black Friday deals, it’s a good time to slow down and take a look at how people spend money around the holidays. I find it concerning how people are persuaded to overconsume and overspend around Christmas, specifically when it comes to buying presents.
According to one survey, parents expect to spend, on average, $416 per kid, with other sources saying anywhere from $100-300. More alarmingly, 49% of parents intend to go into debt to buy Christmas presents for their kids, often through credit cards or “buy now, pay later” programs.
Is that financial burden really worth it for thirty minutes of unwrapping on Christmas morning, especially when we know that even the shiniest of toys quickly lose their luster?
This holiday spending phenomena is caused by a potent mix of marketing, social pressures, and psychological factors. It can result in
financial difficulties, both in the month of December and into the New Year.
stress and heightened emotions around money, possessions, and relationships.
a shift of values as giving gifts may become more important than things like contentment.
cluttered homes as material things can accumulate, and gifted can be hard to let go of.
and a drain on the environment as things become mass produced and shipped across the world.
But most importantly, too high a priority placed on gifts can be disrespectful to Jesus, who’s birthday we’re supposed to be remembering. This pressure can form idols that get in the way of glorifying God: we might not necessarily be worshiping the toys, but the pursuit of pleasure and the comparison of our gifts to other people’s can quickly replace the reverence we owe to God.
I don’t believe that the average person is intentionally trying to make bad decisions, nor am I arguing that we should never give each other gifts. But I do think it’s important to be thoughtful and prudent about what gifts we do decide to give. It’s understandable for people to feel pressured into their gift-giving habits by outside forces, without giving much thought as to how or why they are using their resources.
Christmas is a time of festivities and cheer, so people tend to prioritize having an enjoyable time and making themselves or others happy more than at other times of the year, where they may be inclined more towards frugality and practicality.
People naturally compare themselves to others, however, we’ve now been presented with unnatural standards to compare ourselves to, through the happy, perfect Christmases we see in advertising and on social media. This can make people feel inadequate and spend more money to try and achieve this unrealistic new standard.
The fear of missing out is a powerful influence on how we spend our money because as highly social beings, we dislike exclusion. Again, this is a normal human feeling that’s supposed to help regulate deviant behavior. But in the hands of marketers, FOMO is a tool used to sell a promise of belonging in the form of an object.
Many people are not making purchases with the intent to empty their wallets, stress themselves out, and fill up their space. There are many people who view Christmas giving as a way to show love and care to others, which is not a bad thing! Distant relatives may give gifts because they themselves can not be present in a kid’s life. Gift giving is an expression of love and thinking of others, which we are called to do as Christians.
There’s even a Biblical precedent for gift-giving, as we find in Matthew 7:8-11, “ For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks it will be opened. Or which one of you, if his son asks him for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a serpent? If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him!”
Or when we look at James 1:17, “Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change,” we see a God who delights in giving good gifts.
So the issue is not with gifts themselves; it is with our values. The distinction arises when we examine the motivations behind our generosity.
Are we giving gifts that align with what God wants for the other people’s lives? Or are we giving gifts solely based on our own desires for pleasure and the fleeting fun of the moment?
The culture preaches values of “you deserve this” and “your personal happiness is the most important thing.” When we get obsessed with our own feelings and the image we present to other people, these desires quickly turn into idols.
Can these be the good and perfect gifts God has promised us? Or is it a quick fix to try to cover up a deeper longing in our hearts? Sure, a shiny new gadget might make you happy now, but what about when the battery runs out, or your friend gets a newer, cooler model?
One might be inclined to think that the alternative to seeking your own pleasure is to not have any fun at all. Images of dour Puritans or the Grinch or Ebeneezer Scrooge might dance in your mind.
However, that’s not actually the case! Not only is it possible to have fun and happiness without depending on possessions for it, it’s going to be a deeper, more fulfilling happiness than anything you can order on Amazon.
There’s nothing sinful about gifts, but the satisfaction comes from God.
Good stewardship is important, when we consider that our money and our possessions don’t belong to us but are merely on loan to us by God, who expects us to use them to His glory. Some of this does include spending money on gifts that bless others, but we don’t want those gifts to be a stumbling block wrapped in paper and ribbon for our Christian brothers and sisters.
Some ideas for gifts that glorify God without being materialistic include:
Gifts of an experience, such as tickets to an event, doing an activity together, or taking them out to dinner.
Gifts that meet a practical need for them. Food is one of my favorite gifts to give or to receive.
Making a donation to a charity, such as Samaritan’s Purse or Compassion International, in their honor.
It may seem counterintuitive at first, but by limiting expectations for gifts, the gifts that are exchanged often carry more significance and weight. Don’t let debt and desire become an idol this year, instead, focus on the greatest Gift ever given. Ultimately, contentment is a mindset that is more valuable than anything that can fit under the tree.
Thank you for reading today’s post. I should have an update ready for all y’all fairly shortly, because boy, has it been a roller coaster of a year. In the meantime, please enjoy some of my other Christmas posts, and have a wonderful holiday with your families.
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