When Coping Strategies Become Problems: Helping Teenagers Find Better Ways Forward

Teenagers are constantly finding ways to solve problems. I think that's helpful to remember. Human beings are driven to find ways to cope with discomfort, uncertainty and stress, and teenagers are no different. The intention is usually good. The challenge is that some of the strategies they discover aren't particularly helpful in the long term.

I was listening to a podcast with Richard Osman recently, and he said something really interesting. He was reflecting on his struggles with alcohol addiction, which began in childhood. The thing he said that struck me was that he felt like he had a fast mind, and if you have a fast mind as a child, you can really go off track.

He compared it to direction. Hussein Bolt is the best if he’s running in the right direction, but if he's running in the wrong direction, he would be the worst runner in the world. So if you have a strategy as a kid that isn’t a great one and you become really good at it, you will be more damaged. What starts as a small strategy to cope with one moment becomes fixed, and if you go off track by just 1% to begin with, you end up a long way from home.