A pilot for a channel that doesn't exist yet

Over the last few evenings I built a pilot reel for a channel I haven't started.

A father, a spilled glass of water, and the seconds between the anger arriving and the first word. Two voices: what he says out loud, and what runs underneath. Forty seconds.

The interesting part of losing my temper isn't the temper. It's the gap before it. Some days I catch it. Some days I hear my own voice first.

I've watched this forty times and lost the ability to see it cold. So:

• Did the first three seconds hold you?

• Do the two voices read as one person, or as two characters?

• Would you send it to anyone? If not, what would have to change?

Blunt is useful. "It's boring" tells me more than "nice work" does. If there's a second where you checked out, name it.

Comments are open.