technical fuckery from the front lines of software engineering Anonymous rants on software development, org chaos, security and eveything in between from ...
Hey I created a fascinating and complex 45 page deck on my cock and balls for you to read — make sure you read it before Q2 planning — I draw significant, thought-proviking conclusions on a wide range of themes that me and my buddy Claude hallucinated together over a series of several Opus threads — I kept having to split them because I ran out of tokens — but it's really my own work because I…
I have never been so happy. For years we've had to enjoy bullshit optimization snakeoil from squirmy self-professed experts in search engine optimization but now JOYOUS DAYS! AI summaries are eating now eating their fucking lunch while maintaining eye contact and I've never been happier. Organic traffic is in freefall, SEO wankjobs on Linked in are trying to position themselves and reinvent their…
Do you enjoy online meetings with 40+ people? Do you use words like "callout", "verticals" and "unknown unknowns"? How about getting nothing done, ever? Does that get you off? Huh? Well I've got great news, a job in Corporate may be right for you.
So many meetings are just a bunch of non-useful people jerking off and getting paid for it. You put creators, I mean real makers of things in a room and the sparks just fly, it's awesome. Project managers, account managers, these guys are all just fucking window dressing at best.
Me, CTO: Ok I'll share my screen WebEx: Nah brah, you can fuck off Rest of call: Hurr durr R U hAvInG TeCnicAl ISSUES?!? Fucking a-class 24 carat comedy gold.
Your website is not fast. Probably not, anyway, unless you've put any thought into it. But then you probably didn't notice. Maybe you get a frantic, garbled call from your CEO, who's taken a break from boffing his mistress in Greece to inform you that the website doesn't load for shit on the phone he bought in the airport. Ironically, the main man is probably experiencing the web as most people…
I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by. Douglas Adams My favourite deadlines are the ones that are absolutely unmoveable until the client says they're not going to meet it/they're going to push it back. Especially when the team has been pulling up trees and putting in hours to get it shipped. Fucking fun times all round, especially while project management just shrugs…
I'm adopting a new mantra for kickoff meetings and any forum where fuckheads dream up what the web might be able to do in their imagination and hope it sticks. My new mantra is No. I don't have a great deal of time, sanity or patience and just saying no has saved me a great deal of all three. Try it. The outcome will be people have to work harder to get you to say yes, and your projects will be…