What We Never Really Think About...

While listening to Heartbreak Beat by The Psychedelic Furs, I’m thinking of that moment where you’re asking questions as to what’s going to happen in the future.

The future.

We never know what can come of it, can we?

We have our expectations, our ideas of what’s to come. But that’s never written to stone just by those very powers of expectations and assumptions.

But as we all have our expectations and assumptions as to what is to come of our future, we sometimes lose what’s happening right now. We lose the valuable moments with the people and the things that make us whole. Whether that be your best friends, your family, your pets… your youth.

You think so much of something that hasn’t come to pass yet more than what’s happening now. Right now. This very day. This very hour. This very second.

You miss out so much to the point that you lose one or more of those very things and people who make you or made you to who you are and how you are and what you are.

Right now, a very close, close, dear friend of mine is back in the hospital despite the fact she was discharged yesterday to be home sweet home, away from all nurses, doctors, and, even worse, all the tests that annoy her so so much.

I never know when the last moment will be our last. That shatters me to think that, but it’s better to embrace the time that is left, if it is expiring at all, right here and right now. I can’t go so far as to assume the worst, but that very assumption has kept me on my toes.

I’ve lost two friends to their unpredictable passing. I found out months after they were gone. All that came to mind was how I wished I was talking to them more, present with them more, showing them that I loved them and cared for them to the end.

But I wasn’t.

Instead, I was building my way through life, always expecting, always assuming, always planning, always achieving. I didn’t even think of the ones who gave me that hope, that encouragement, that support, that drive to move forward and continuing to do just that.

For the longest time, I felt that I had abandoned them when they were at their worst. They never told me. Never sent me a message. Just nothing but silence.

My only expectations was to achieve what I was to achieve, and then to update everyone of my success and progress. And, unfortunately, two of the very people I wanted to update are gone. Gone months before I could even say a word of how thankful I was of them, how they helped me through so much, that I couldn’t have done it without them and their undying friendship.

Undying friendship.

A beautiful saying. To me, anyway.

Because the friendship never ends when the person who you trusted, admired, appreciated, etc. takes their final breath in this world. It never dies. It lives on in their undying spirit.

Although it hurts so much that they are gone in the flesh, I have to tell myself that they already knew of all I wanted to tell them, and that they will always live on in my heart and memory.

The friend in the hospital right now… she has been a light in my life. She showed me how to view my life in a more positive aspect, and how to utilize my own fears, my own anxieties, my own struggles, etc. as a way that defines me and will help me to grow rather than to falter.

She has shown me that I can do anything even when I think I don’t have it in me to do what I can do now. She has given me the opportunities to see that the world is never against me. It’s me against the world. And even though the sky’s the limit, that should never stop me from achieving what I’m meant to achieve.

I don’t know yet about my friend’s present condition, but I only know one thing: she’s a fighter. She and I are the same zodiac sign - Capricorn. We are born to be fighters, born to be leaders, and born to be loyal. And even when we had our rough patches - which only happened perhaps twice in the time we’ve known each other - we’ve always found our ways back to each other in the way a friendship fights to last forever, even in death.

She and I are a friendship of our own… as every friendship should be to their own. There is no such thing as hierarchy as to who is more special than the other. They’re all special in their own way, even if they are never meant to last for long. They define us, make us stronger, help us learn, and bring us to understand what the world is all about and, even better, what we’re all about.

What my friend and I have is something that is, indeed, one that will last far beyond our lifetimes and our wildest dreams and expectations. We’ve grown to thrive, and we’ve grown to appreciate and to respect and to keep on progressing forward.

We tend to forget the meaningfulness that comes of our friendships, our significant others, and, even more, our families (if the families are non-dysfunctional). We don’t realize how time is precious until the moment hits when the time is up.

We fall back, we become shocked, and we don’t know how to fathom what has happened until after a brief moment of self-reflection. And this self-reflection is crucial to our human being.

It’s not our fault that we become so entuned to our own desires, our own dreams, our own pursuits, and our own achievements. We bask in the idea of being our own individual self, and seeking everything that is to be one’s humanity.

So much, that we ignore what is really the true understanding of life itself. That it is sacred. That it is fragile. That it is limited. That it exists in the undefeatable brackets of mortality.

It’s completely out of all of our hands.

We begin to think of our mortality as well, to the point that we begin to build and cherish more memories with those we never know for certain when the end is to come.

I decided to write this article due to this train of thought of mortality, of learning to embrace and cherish all who exist today because tomorrow could be different, and accept the end when it hits, no matter how hard it comes at me.

Right now, as my friend is going through her unfortunate set-back, I’m more and more entuned in being there for her, and being there for others who know her, and those who are by my side through this troublesome and worrisome time.

I hope this article helps to encourage you to think of those and everything that has made you possible in this world, in this existence, in this present moment. One day, they can be gone, and you may feel that your world has crumbled down, but… it hasn’t.

It’s still there, supporting you as you go. The body is just a vessel, but the spirit is the stone or marble that makes the pillars of your life keep on standing. You may have a lot of things you ever so wanted to say to them while they were living, but, I assure you, they knew before you were ever going to think the words to say them. They knew you. And that’s all that matters.

The end is never truly the end, even when we think it to be. Life always goes on, as it has for us as a human race for over 250,000 years through all evolution. It never stops, unless God or Mother Nature says it so.

Thank you for reading this article. Feel free to like, share, and subscribe. I appreciate the support, as I write a variety of topics here.

Love and Peace with you always.