As I sort, purge and re-home my possessions to embark on the next chapter I am facing a lot of things. Cherished and not so cherished things that have been part of my life in Tulsa. It’s the culmination of years of collecting, purchasing and receiving stuff. It’s a bit overwhelming and a lot to process, especially since I’ve set a goal to only take what fits in my car (a 2006 Honda Accord).
I left NYC in my mid twenties with a couple of suitcases and moved to Taiwan, back before extra bag fees. At the time, I had a collection of keychains which I had started to build in my teens. Why I chose to take those and not my high school yearbook is beyond me. That yearbook is lost, tossed out by my family in a purge, because I was not around to advocate for it. Thankfully, a dear classmate has replicated it online. (If you graduated with me and would like to see and be part of the online site, message me and I’ll put you in touch with our host.)For some reason, those keychains held prominence in my life. Perhaps because they reminded me of places I had been and were a small memento of an experience or gift from a friend who thought of me during their travels.
When I moved back from Taiwan, three years later, I had about the same number of bags. The apartment in Tienmu was rented out to another foreigner and the furnishings dispersed through the tight-knit community as was the tradition. It was an effective and efficient system that benefitted travelers who chose to make Taipei their home. I brought those keychains with some new additions back to the US.
While I moved to Texas with only a couple of suitcases of clothes and a Honda Civic, it’s not all that I had by the time we relocated to Tulsa. I remember visiting my (then) future husband’s family and noticing their menagerie of knick-knacks. I commented to him that we hardly had any knicks or knacks and how charming they were. Having decorative artifacts made a house- a home. For the thirteen years that followed, we acquired unique and interesting souvenirs throughout our travels. A hand carved totem pole from a Fijian shaman, a batik silk scarf by an artisan in Kota Kinabalu and small trinket dish from Paris among other treasures. These are the things we quibbled over during the divorce. Years after they were distributed, when he was moving out of his house, he offered his stash to me as he was downsizing. I didn’t take much as I had moved from a 1250 sq.ft. townhome to a 760 sq.ft. condo. Funny how important they once seemed…
As I packed my clothes and belongings for this phase, I gifted and donated a lot of things. My beloved mystery book collection that was gathering dust along with countless CDs needed a new home.
Yes, most of those discs were Springsteen bootlegs. Oh, and those keychains now numbered 500! I swear they were like tribbles that multiplied at the blink of an eye.
I had already chosen to rent out my condo furnished, so I wouldn’t have to deal with the furnishings, but the rest was still quite the burden.
There was little that was truly ‘sellable’ and I was not interested in putting them on marketplace, eBay or Craig’s List (is that still a thing?). I took a batch of clothes to a consignment store I’ve used for years. My signed first edition murder mysteries are now at Oak Tree Books, thanks Sean! He was very kind and helped me take pictures of the messages written on the title pages so I have them as a keepsake. The commercial CDSs went to Josey Records along with some of my bootlegs for personal use to the young ladies who work there. It’s inspiring to know there are 20 somethings who have refined taste in music. Some of my local Springsteen buddies rummaged through photos, art and music then the rest have gone for safe keeping to Studio Records, thanks Mike! Perhaps for some of you the decision of what to do with music and memorabilia is simple, not in my case. I wanted other people to enjoy them and I’m not ready to let them go. They were gifted to me and absolutely not for sale. Having someone who ‘gets’ it and will host my treasures while letting others enjoy them was priceless. Go visit Studio Records and Oak Tree Books and spend some money with them.
There are still a tub of memories, ticket stubs and conference lanyards. My son’s art work and other gems that I considered getting rid of, but my wise friend talked me into storing at her house.
So, while this stuff was sexy (ok, maybe not the keychains) the rest was more difficult to part with.
I don’t think of myself as a clothes horse, but I come from a line of women who were. I can travel for a month in a carry-on bag and have been living in a relatively small place, but I’ve accumulated quite a bit over the almost 30 years I’ve lived in this area.
As I mentioned previously, my son is not very sentimental AND he lives on the other end of the planet. I really wanted the things I had to be useful and loved enough to have another life. This seemed wonderfully altruistic, then the days ticked down and I still had all this shit!
Tulsa is full of non-profits and it’s full of very generous people. This makes for a lot of donations and over the years the charities have gotten more selective about what they take. It’s harder to give than you’d think.
I started off embracing The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning (highly recommended) then turned into Marie Kondo. It’s almost go time so these things morphed from things I couldn’t live without to black bags of trash. I loved you once, but now you have to go!
If you’re wondering, the keychains were donated along with some other items to Birthright Living Legacy, a very worthwhile organization doing good work so please keep them in mind when you’re feeling charitable.
Now I need to go play luggage tetras. Send good vibes as I pack my car and get ready to head out coddiwompling…
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