Copyedits and Haunted Libraries

Hello darkness, my old friend.

In general, authors are discouraged from using song lyrics in their manuscripts because of the permissions required. Plus, as my editor wisely pointed out during developmental edits, there’s often a more unique and creative way to say something (after which, I bid adieu to my reference to ‘Hi, it’s me, I’m the problem it’s me.’)

It wasn’t until reading through copyedits for SLEEP WHILE THEY SLEEP that I stumbled across the above line from the Sound of Silence by Simon & Garfunkel. Yes, I was aware it was a song lyric when I initially penned it, but it somehow escaped notice in subsequent rounds of revisions. It’s flashing like a neon sign now.

Luckily, I’m in copyedits!!! This can be changed! But to what exactly?

My brain immediately jumps to something like: I greet the darkness like a friend.

Not bad. Although to my main character, the darkness is really like a new friend since she’s only just embarked on her sleepless journey.

I greet the darkness like a new friend.

I could then tack on something poignant like, I greet the darkness like a new friend, one I’d unintentionally made but made nonetheless.

Which is wOrDy and just not quite right.

I decide to keep it shorter and punchier and move on with my life and onto the next paragraph, which reads: Here I am, late at night, in the glider that’s basically turned into my second bed, trying to lull Gretchen to sleep.

Full stop. Because that doesn’t fit, so back to the prior line I go!

Rolling my neck in my chair at the table in our kitchen nook that looks out over a lake, I dive deep, because why the hell is the darkness a friend, anyway? Paul Simon might have seen it that way, but that’s not really the vibe I’m going for (read: thriller).

So, what is darkness to me? Honestly: scary. Ever since I was a kid, I’ve been afraid of the dark, which at some point I learned is actually hereditary. My grandmother was scared of the dark and so is my daughter. Beyond that scientific explanation, the dark has always felt mysterious, unknown. Without being able to rely on my eyes, every sound is amplified, every feeling more intense, rife for an overactive imagination.

Okay, my writer brain thinks, maybe there’s something there.

The darkness beckons to me, mysterious and unknown like an over-eager acquaintance I’d been hoping to avoid.

Wait, why are we back to the friend thing?! We’ve moved on from there!

Right. Focus.

Darkness beckons to me, a living entity, mysterious and unknowable.

Darkness beckons to me, this entity I’ve been afraid of most of my life but that now feels familiar, quiet, almost welcoming.

Darkness welcomes me into its embrace.

That last idea spawns another thought…perhaps there’s comfort to be found in the solitude of darkness, so maybe the friend thing isn’t entirely off the table. But it needs to be snappy…

Darkness greets me like an overeager new friend.

And there you have it! What I *finally* landed on. Only 281 more pages to go…at least I have a furry assistant.

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this peek inside a writer’s brain deep in the weeds of copyedits. If you need me I’ll be agonizing over word choices and em dashes.

In other news…

I’m super excited to be participating in The Haunted Library August 6 from 6-9pm at Marmalade Lounge with Bespoke Wine Journeys in Olde Town Arvada!! Wine tasting, a book pop with the fabulous Wandering Book Co, tarot readings, and a reading from yours truly! Tickets available on Eventbrite.

That’s all from me! Hope everyone is enjoying their summer and staying cool.

Cheers,

Kate