Measure Once, Cut Twice

I’m currently making a satyr costume for a fantasy festival thing happening this weekend. And as it turns out, making costumes is harder than I realised. Despite my best efforts, life has repeatedly gotten in the way and I find myself now just 3 days away from the event with most of my satyr legs completed and no idea how to sew on the butt and crotch.

I now know that I should have measured and adapted a pattern and blah blah blah but that sounds like a lot of effort and planning. Instead, I opted for my usual method of going for it and trying to fix it along the way. It works for games - mostly - surely it’ll work for this!

Except, it doesn’t really work, does it?

My planter box is wonky, my satyr legs are both different lengths, RISE shipped without an explanation on how to win…

My habit of throwing myself into something does mean that I try things which is probably the biggest hurdle for most people though. It means that I get to fill my life with cool things like circus and drums and stiltwalking and making games. I just wish I had the sort of brain that liked to sit down and plan things out properly first rather than the sort of brain that views any form of tutorial as propaganda by the machine that must be ignored!

Perhaps I’m just frustrated because I now also have to make satyr legs for my partner which will need to include some padding as she doesn’t have the benefit of custom stils to give her legs the right shape and I have no idea what I’m doing.

At the end of the day, I’m sure I’ll be able to put together something good enough which means we get to have fun volunteering and being NPCs in the Whispering Woods. But then another part of me, the bit that’s been conditioned by the constant shouting of side hustle Instagram that says the costume needs to be perfect so we can get professional videos and pictures so I can get more stilt work and-

Part of me is constantly assessing my life so it can optimise and monetise every hobby. If I manage to quieten that part of my mind, the nagging laundry list of chores and household needs pipes up. If I somehow get through them then I realise I need to take care of myself physically. And by the time all three have been sated for the day, it’s 10pm and I can, if I’m lucky, snatch one care-free hour before bed.

And I don’t think I’m the only one either.

I’m sure this isn’t a modern phenomenon. I’m sure this plight harkens back to some neolithic survival instinct that is now misfiring. I can’t placate my need for safety by sharpening sticks and setting them around my tree so I must engage in arcane rituals with words and electricity that somehow gives me the ability to buy food. I cannot just find a shelter, I must pay the big ape S’antan-der for the privilege of living in a house that needs extensive work done to stop it burning down.

We’re having to pay nearly £7000 to replace our wires which seem to be from the 1970s so please buy games off of blackwellwriter.com to help us not die in a house fire. /jk-not-jk

So What’s The Answer?

The great thing about costume stuff is that you can always fix it. It’s rare that you end up in a situation where you’re just S outta L and need to start over. Especially so when no-one actually knows what your costume is supposed to look like. If I was trying to be Mr Tumnus, fair, my wonky legs and janky butt might cause some die hard Narnia fans to beat me to death but no-one knows what my OC satyr is meant to look like so that works in my favour.

I’ve also resolved to get my daily routine back in order. To start doing yoga and meditating again. I had stopped for ages because I was in the circus and running around for 8 hours is great for the mind and body but then that stopped. My daily routine lately has been wake up, go on Instagram, check emails, go downstairs and get breakfast, check bluesky/emails/discord/itch/patreon, tackle one problem, check bluesky/emails/discord/itch/patreon, then usually be too sick to do much and get distracted by life stuff like electricians, MOTs, convention prep, gah.

That isn’t healthy and I can feel that it isn’t productive either.

I could chalk up my bad habits to the fact that I have been continually sick and or injured this whole year but then part of me wonders if the bad habits aren’t contributing heavily to that cycle.

Why Are You Writing This?

While at the UK Games Expo, I had a surprising number of people thank me for talking about the stuff I’m going through in a honest way. I hadn’t really realised it but I suppose a lot of #content is written in such a way that it only highlights the positive aspects of being a creator. We then compare our lives to this fictional life we see on our screens and wonder why we’re finding things so hard. So I wanted to share this not as a way to whinge and moan about my inability to thread a needle - 25 minutes it took me, I would have accepted death if it had been offered - but as a way to share some honest behind the scenes stuff. Cause this is just a pair of furry legs, can you imagine how much hassle my lack of planning caused when I was making For Small Creatures Such As We?

Be kind to yourself.

Media of the Week

Accused

A BBC anthology series about people on trial for crimes they either did or did not commit. It’s fantastically put together and every episode I’ve watched so far has been amazing. Sean Bean’s episode in particular hit hard.

Give it a watch and be ready for some gut wrenching performances.

Gamey Bits

I recently put up a free post over on Patreon highlighting our two upcoming games about spirits. Go check it out: https://www.patreon.com/posts/thats-spirit-160137342