Don’t Miss Your Life While You’re Trying to Build It

And yes — anyone who’s ever seen a four-year-old in a mini soccer uniform knows. It’s objectively the most adorable thing on earth.

But the moment that actually got me wasn’t on the field.

I looked to my right.

There was Caleb. My ten-year-old. Sitting right beside me, cheering his little brother on.

Here’s why that stopped me: Caleb is always the one on the field and I’m the one cheering him on. This was the first time in his life that the roles were reversed — he was sitting with us, with his parents, as a spectator, as a supporter, as a big brother doing what big brothers do.

I felt it in my chest before I could put words to it. He’s growing up so fast.

And it felt really, really good to have him right there beside me.

But, it did make me think: how many of these magical moments did I previously miss?

Not because I wasn’t there. I was there. But I’ve been there before — physically present, watching a game, in the room — while being completely somewhere else. Looping on a conversation, thinking about an email I didn’t send or rehearsing a scenario that hadn’t happened yet.

Stress doesn’t just drain your energy. It makes you miss your life.

Yesterday, I caught the moment. And the first thought I had — before the warmth, before the gratitude — was: thank god my mind was clear enough for this.

We talk about stress in terms of what it costs us professionally. Productivity, focus, decision quality and sleep, to name a few.

But what about the cost of missing the most important moments in life?

I’ve been at birthday parties while building a deal in my head. I’ve had dinners where I was nodding along while mentally rehearsing a conversation I needed to have. I’ve watched games, attended events, been present for milestones — and come home with nothing. Just the faint awareness that something happened and I wasn’t really in it.

Stress is a thief and it robs us of what matters most. Let’s make sure this doesn’t happen or happens much less.

How?

Train our minds to be fit. Mental fitness gives our minds availability — the degree to which your mind is clear enough to register what’s actually in front of you. A business opportunity, yes. But also a ten-year-old sitting beside you for the first time, cheering on his little brother.

I’ve started calling this Presence as Performance. It’s one of the most meaningful measures of how well your mind is actually functioning.

Here’s the part I want to be honest about, because I see a lot of advice in this space that oversimplifies it.

You can’t decide your way into presence.

You can’t say to yourself, I need to be present at Jasper’s soccer game — and have that work. Not if you haven’t been training for it. Not if you’ve been running on a clogged, stressed, overloaded mind all week and then expecting it to suddenly clear on command for the moments that matter.

Presence is a muscle. And like any muscle, it responds to how consistently you’ve been training it.

The good news: the training isn’t complicated. It doesn’t require an hour of meditation or a 5am routine or a major life restructure. It’s built through small, consistent micropractices that most people overlook because they don’t feel significant in the moment.

A morning check-in. One question: What kind of day do I want to have?

A 10-minute walk after lunch when you’re irritated. Don’t try to solve something, just get outside, feel the sun, let the noise settle.

A 3pm pause where you just take 3 slow and full breaths to reset your nervous system.

These are the reps. Each one is training the self-awareness muscle — the part of you that notices when your mind has drifted, catches it without judgment, and brings you back.

Do this consistently, and everything shifts.

Professionally, you start making better decisions. You see what others miss. You catch the small nuances — in a conversation, a room, a pitch, a relationship — that a clogged, stressed mind walks right past.

And personally?

You catch Caleb sitting beside you. You notice Jasper looking back at you from the field with a huge grin, just to make sure you’re watching.

You catch the moments that won’t be on your calendar, won’t be in your inbox, and can’t be rescheduled.

We can’t go back for the ones we missed. But we can give ourselves the best chance at the ones still coming.

— Marc

All content here is free. I believe we all benefit when we reflect together, ask better questions, and build a society anchored in clarity, health, and purpose. Mental fitness shouldn't be a luxury; it’s a foundational tool for both personal and collective evolution.

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