The Bravest Person I Know Is (almost) Three

This week our youngest daughter offered me a masterclass in courage.

So often we think courage looks like confidence.

It doesn’t.

It looks like an almost three-year-old walking into a dance class where she doesn’t know anyone, can’t do all the moves, and has every reason to sit safely on the sidelines.

When she arrived she was given the option to observe or join in.
She chose to participate.

She walked into the room and sat down beside three older girls in leotards and tutus. As the warm-up began she watched carefully and did everything the teacher asked to the best of her ability.

Did it take her twice as long as the others to go through the motions? Yes.

Were her movements a bit clumsy or awkward? Yes.

Was she slower than the others? Yes.

And when class ended, she walked out, pointed to one of the girls, and said:

“That’s Vivi. She’s my friend.”

No hesitation. No overthinking. Just engagement.

The next day after her nap, I told her it was time for a bath.

“Mama, I think I want to take a shower,” she said.

She had never taken a shower.

New sounds. New sensations. No prior experience to rely on. And still — curiosity over comfort. Participation over protection.

Was she hesitant? Yes. But she made the choice to step in and had her second life-first in two days.

In Strong Ground, Brené Brown writes:

“People look brave when they’re trying new things, and they feel vulnerable because they’re trying new things (which is the definition of courage).”

That’s it.

Courage isn’t a personality trait.
It’s not certainty.
It’s not the absence of fear.

It’s the willingness to try while feeling vulnerable.

Our little one didn’t wait to feel ready. She didn’t require mastery before participation. She didn’t avoid what was unfamiliar.

She chose to try.

And that’s where true courage is cultivated.

Not in the moment we feel confident —
but in the moment we say yes before we feel ready.

Every time we:

• Engage instead of avoid

• Join the space or place where we’re not the best

• Try the skill we haven’t mastered

• Have the hard conversation

• Step into something new

We are building courage with intention.

Vulnerability isn’t the obstacle - It’s the training ground.

When our youngest left dance class, she didn’t say, “I was brave.”

She said, “That’s Vivi. She’s my friend.”

Courage expands us. It connects us. It shifts something within us.

And it often begins with the simple decision to try.

Courage isn’t about being fearless. It’s about being willing.

With gratitude,
Betsy

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