Things I’d Have No Problem Naming After Donald Trump

It’s been reported the Trump administration wants to rename Pennsylvania Station in New York City to, what else, Trump Station.

Are you tired of Trump naming and renaming everything after himself? I am, too. However, here are a few Trump-branded places, products and services I could live with.

• Donald J. Trump Solitary Confinement Suite

• Donald J. Trump Explosive Diarrhea

• Donald J. Trump Men’s Kankle Hosiery

• Donald J. Trump International Cockroach Hotel and Resort

• Donald J. Trump Institute of Erectile Dysfunction

• Donald J. Trump Nepotism Hall of Fame.

• Donald J. and Melania Trump Separate Bedroom Designs

• Donald J. Trump Out-of-Order Porta Potty

• Donald J. Trump Cognitive Test Tutoring

• Donald J. Trump’s all-time outdated and irrelevant music CD

Comedy writer Ben Alper has written for Jay Leno, David Letterman and others. He is the author of “Live From the Beginning of Time: Late Night Comedy Monologues Through the Ages”