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Dispatches From the Bananas Republic · Aug 20, 2026

082026 Dispatch: Commie Shock in Florida, Royal Move in the Works

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Al Perrotta · Dispatches From the Bananas Republic

It’s Thursday, August 20 and a new dispatch is in hand.

Will be a short one, as I am on the road. And if I stay on the road too long, Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. might strap me to his hood and eat me.

Socialist Radical Angie Nixon Wins Democratic Senate Nomination in Florida

What are the chances for a communist in a state 90 miles from Cuba? About the same as Hasan Piker celebrating Hannukah.

She defeated, humiliated Andrew Vindman, the little troll who was behind the 2019 impeachment of President Trump for his call to Ukraine president Volodymyr Zelenksyy.

I don’t want to say I’m happy a commie won. But I’m happy the commie won.

Nixon’s one of the crazies who wants to abolish ICE, abolish “for profit” prisons. (Translation: “I know I can’t say I want to abolish prisons. But I’m in the DSA, so that’s what I want, along with no borders, no Senate, no Supreme Court and cars to be replaced with unicorns.)

Prince Harry and Meghan Markle Are Moving Back to the UK

Unwanted immigrants? Will Homeland Security pay for the flight?

Apparently somebody spotted Harry’s balls on Ebay and gifted them back to the prince.

Even royalty is fleeing California.

Apparently Harry is keen on repairing relationships back home. William hasn’t been this excited since discovering he had pattern baldness.

Seriously, I do hope it’s not because the king isn’t doing well. Kinda suck if he waited decades and decades for a promotion and only got to enjoy it a couple years.

DC Prepares for Freedom 250 Grand Prix Indy-Style Car Race

Washington is putting the final touches on preparing downtown DC for this weekend’s Freedom 250 Grand Prix race.

Race events start Saturday, with attempted Indy carjackings beginning Saturday night. (The main race is Sunday.)

Nancy Mace Gets Arms Tattooed

Why does it feel she is only days away from an OnlyFans.

Sean and Rachel-Campos Duffy’s “Great American Road Trip” Reality Show Premieres

The Secretary of Treasury and the host of “Fox & Friends” weekend took their nine kids on a trip to six American destinations: Philadelphia; Texas; the Grand Canyon; Charleston, South Carolina; Montana; Wyoming; and Boston.

Fun fact. When the Duffy family went to Montana they doubled the state’s population.

Again, sorry so short today, but little chance after driving to do much. Have a great day!

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