070826 Dispatch: BREAKING: Trump Says Deal With Iran Is "Over"

It’s July 8, 2026 and a new dispatch is in hand.

Breaking: Trump Says Deal With Iran is “Over,” and Is a “Waste of Time,” After Iran Struck Three Vessels in the Strait of Hormuz

All he is saying is he gave peace a chance.

Trump called his foes liars and he doesn’t want to “deal with sick people.” But enough about Mitch McConnell.

Graham Platner Finally on the Ropes After Ex Accuses Him of Rape

The Democratic Party is finally abandoning Maine Senate candidate Graham Platner after an ex-girlfriend accused him of having broken into her home and raped her. Was that before or after he was hanging out on an app popular with child predators?

Who we kidding? Democrats aren’t throwing him over because he’s been accused of rape. (Ask Juanita Broderick about that.) They’re throwing him over because he’s losing.

When story broke Monday that he was canceling events and might drop out because of another scandal, the big mystery was “After all the other red flags that this was a Nazi-loving abuser and loser, what in the world could be the thing that had Dems saying, ‘Now that’s too far?” Was he caught wearing a MAGA hat? Insulting Taylor Swift’s wedding dress? Declare, “You know what? I like the Jews after all”?

“That’s Kind of My Man,” said Elizabeth Warren of Platner. That will Poca-haunt-her.

Platner is reportedly refusing to drop out unless he can name his replacement. “I’m tan, rested and ready,” says Bill Cosby.

Tyler Robinson Preliminary Hearing: They’ve Got Video of Him Walking on Campus, Going Up to the Roof, Crossing the Roof, Getting Into Sniper Position, Coming Down on the Roof. They’ve Got His DNA and That of His Lover on the Towel Used on the Murder Weapon. They’ve Got Him Confessing to the Killing. And On and On …

And Candace Owens still be like, “Charlie was killed by a bee-sized drone developed by the Jews.”

US Loss to Belgium in World Cup

Does this mean we get to go back to watching a real sport?

It was an embarrassing performance. Even Ashlee Simpson’s going, “Oh, man, that was bad.”

That amazing blunder by the goalie? I don’t think we lose that match if Scott Sterling was in goal. Just sayin’.

Look at the bright side. If you’re gonna muck it up, it might as well be in front of the whole world. (I think Bob Geldof said that before Live Aid.)

Trump’s in Turkey for the NATO Summit

Working on world peace and economic prosperity, blah-blah. The big question: Will he and Italy’s Meloni kiss and make up?

Speaking of international matters, I remember during the Bicentennial countries giving us a bunch of stuff, like South Korea giving us this huge friendship bell that sits overlooking the Pacific in San Pedro. I think Japan’s given us some more Cherry trees. Anybody else give us anything?

Well, Norway with the rowing bit at the World Cup is a nice gift. I mean, watching liberals get the vapers over the intense display of masculinity is worth a thousand bells.

Five People Hurt on the First Day of the Running of the Bulls in Pamplona

Think that’s brutal, try the Walking of the Subways in New York.

Mamdani Appointees Vote Him and Other City Leaders a Big Raise

A Mandami-appointed commission in New York has just voted to give leaders an 18.2% raise.

Communism 101: The Leaders Get Theirs While the ‘People’ Get Screwed

“The View’s” Sunny Hostin Claims She Feels “Unsafe” If She’s in a Neighborhood With American Flags

She’s such a liar. It’s a dark street at night. One side has American flags. The other doesn’t. You know she’s walking on the side with the flags.

Besides, she walks down any proud flag-waving street in middle America most folks would be like “Oh, man! Is that Janet Jackson?!?!” And the worst threat she’d face is being run over by autograph seekers.

Just a reminder to Hostin that there’s so much white supremacy in the US that the SPLC had to pay millions to gin some up.

And that’s that for today.

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