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Banana Peel Pirouette · Apr 30, 2026

Mineruba no Fukurou

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Patrick R · Banana Peel Pirouette

Way back when, I sometimes used to read stuff on GameFAQs for fun. There was a hot minute around the turn of the century when this stuff was sometimes akin to folk literature: random early netizens punching out guides to games, filled with commentary and/or jokes, just for the sake of doing it. Some contributors had a knack for making adventure games or RPGs seem really interesting as they walked readers through the experience, and to do this without pictures or video was a real feat.

Once in a blue moon, when I’m feeling listless and nostalgic, I’ll go onto GameFAQs (it still exists!) and revisit some of this stuff.

There was one particular case where a walkthrough for an obscure PC-98 game stood out to me. I went looking for it recently—and it’s not there. It was the site’s only guide for this game, and it’s just gone now. Was there some kind of a database error? Were GameFAQs’ owners (Fandom, née Wikia, apparently) purging extraneous material? Who knows. I do wonder how often this is happening nowadays, though. Relics of the old internet are growing ever rarer.

Try as I could, I wasn’t able to find it on the Internet Archive, either. But because I get unreasonably stubborn about this sort of thing, I visited my mother and dug up an old laptop I never got around to disposing of. Even though it took like fifteen minutes to boot up after I spent an hour searching a stack of bins in the basement for a power cable, it still mostly works.

This was the laptop I had when I first went to visit my father in Poland a long time ago. I knew there’d be some downtime during the trip, so I got it in my head to finally try playing Mineruba no Fukurou. I downloaded the emulation files and saved the walkthrough, since I wasn’t sure about having internet access without using the household PC. What I didn’t do was make sure I could get the PC-98 emulator working beforehand. I never did manage to figure it out, and I never played the game.

There’s not a lot of information about Mineruba no Fukurou in English, and the fan-translated version isn’t on any of the emulation or abandonware sites I’ve scrolled through. (Seems to be fewer of those around, too.) But since I went to such trouble to find a decades-old walkthrough for it, I thought I’d put it here for posterity. Have a look.

MINERUBA NO FUKUROU MINI-WALKTHROUGH v0.3
for the PC-98 (EnRPG fan translation)
by Michael Lanquist

Unpublished work Copyright 1999-2000 Michael Lanquist

This document is protected by US Copyright Law and the Berne Copyright Convention of 1976. It is a private-use free document for (www.GameFAQs.com) that cannot be copied, altered, or used in any kind of commercial transaction without written permission by me, Michael Lanquist <isjustagame (at) angelfire (dot) com>.

Mineruba No Fukurou is (c) 1997 Earth Satellite.

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This is a loose, spoiler-laden walkthrough I wrote after playing the EnRPG fan translation of Mineruba No Fukurou last year, but I never got around to fleshing it out. The game has a small cult following in Japan since its creator Akira Yamagata died in 1998 and was spoken well of by Masato Kato (creator of Chrono Cross) and Hideo Kojima (creator of Metal Gear Solid). It's a strange but interesting adventure RPG, a lot like Ys with elements of other genres, and has a weird, cool story. But it can be frustratingly difficult because it never really tells you what it wants you to do. Maybe this partial guide will help some people enjoy it more :)

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I. CATAL HUYUK

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- Get up from your seat and walk around the train. You can't talk to anyone, and they don't have anything to say to you. Return to your seat and look out at the neon metropolis outside the window. Watch the cutscene.

- When you wake up, exit the empty train and begin trekking across the grasslands. You can't go into forests for now, it's too dark.

- No matter what direction you go in, you eventually arrive at the burial mound of a lost nameless race. Watch the cutscene, and acquire your first Ghost. Now you can use the [TALK] command.

- Now that it's daytime, you can venture into the wooded areas. Continue on in whatever direction you want, and spend some time killing Hares and Foxes for EXPs and the Pelts they sometimes drop. Wild Goats drop Curved Horns. Run from Nomads, you're not strong enough for them yet. If you use the [SEARCH] command in tall grass or in front of trees with holes in the trunks, you'll sometimes find Medical Herbs, Eggs, or Grain.

- This whole area is randomized, but eventually you'll come into a screen where fog is gathering. That means you're on the right track. Keep going deeper into the fog.

- Catal Huyuk, city of mists and lanterns, has no wall surrounding it. It has no streets or doors, either. Climb one of the ladders and walk around on the rooftops. Talk to the townsfolk. None of them know who they are or what this place is. Go down the ladders and explore the city's honeycombed interior. Whenever you leave and then reenter a room, the people and furniture will all be different. Only the red paintings on the mudbrick walls stay the same. Pay attention to them for later, drawing a map might be a good idea.

- What you're looking for is a unique room with only one entrance from the south that has neat blue geometric patterns on the walls. Talk to the purple-haired girl inside. If you re-enter the room after leaving, it'll be a different room with another one of the usual red paintings.

- After you talk to the girl with purple hair, the man blocking the ladder on top of the largest structure will disappear. Go down into a richly decorated room and talk to the Matriarch and Patriarch. Time for your first quest: go to the northern plateau and get a Bucranium for the festival they're celebrating tomorrow, even though they don't know why.

- Talk to the Patriarch again and he'll give you a Hide Wrap you can equip for DEF. There are people in the main network of rooms dressed in green garb. Some will trade you Grain if you bring them Hides and Curved Horns. Others will trade Medical Herbs for Grain and Eggs. Keep talking to them until you find the one who trades an Obsidian Knife for 6 Grain. Don't set out without equipping it!

- Leave the city and go north, fighting Stags, Serpents, and Nomads. Having the Obsidian Knife equipped makes the Nomads a lot easier to kill, and they drop Medical Herbs and Honey. The Aurochs that start appearing when you get to the plateau are tougher and the rewards are smaller, so just avoid them. Don't fight the Anointed Bull until you're at least level 6.

- After beating the Anointed Bull and getting the Bucranium, return to Catal Huyuk. Before you do anything else, trade all the Grain and Honey you collected for Medical Herbs. Then talk to the Matriarch and Patriarch again, give them the Bucranium, and say YES to their offer to stay the night.

- When you wake up, climb up to the rooftops. After a cutscene, you'll be drawn into a fight with the Sky Mother. Don't waste your Medical Herbs, because you can't win this one.

- Dream of a city square under giant buildings of concrete and glass where hundreds of people hurry over the crosswalks. Find the red tori gates and follow them to a small shrine surrounded by trees full of buzzing cicadas. Acquire your second Ghost, which lets you use the [PRAY] command.

- A strange hooting sound wakes you up. You're lying at the bottom of a garbage pit. The purple-haired girl throws down a rope for you and explains the situation. The gods see their doom in this city and believe you're allied with the ones responsible. In order to save Catal Huyuk, and yourself, you must take its Dream with you for safekeeping and escape.

- The townsfolk are panicking and turning against each other--and you. Move through the misty city interior, killing or avoiding Settlers. They don't drop anything, but extra EXPs never hurts. In some rooms, you'll be attacked by the Earth Mother. RUN FROM HER. Hopefully you were paying attention to the paintings before--what you're looking for are the rooms with skulls painted on the walls, where the dead are buried under the plaster floors. Use the [PRAY] command where the mist is densest. Do this in 5 different skull rooms, and on the fifth, the first of 6 Dreams will be added to your inventory.

- Eventually the Earth Mother corners you and starts a cutscene where she buries you deep in the ground and leaves you in the dark.

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II. LAGASH

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- Wake up and crawl up to the light after an earthquake frees you. Head east across the dusty plains, fighting Wild Dogs and Nomads. If you're having a hard time with Leopards, avoid them for now. When you hit the canal, follow it north.

- Lagash is a walled city, and the guards at the gates won't open it for you because you're dressed like an outsider. The slaves repairing the walls and the farmers in the surrounding fields and orchards think you're a nomad and chase you off if you try talking to them. Walk around the city walls until you hear something hooting in the trees. Follow the owl through an orchard until it leads you to a lone farmer. Kill him and take his white tunic so you can enter the city gates in disguise. The owl reassures you there wasn't any other way.

- Lagash is HUGE. Unlike Catal Huyuk, the people here know who they are because their world is ancient. You can read the dynastic records inscribed on steles in the circles where the dirt roads converge. For the time being, ignore the palace. The gossips in the marketplace say King Gudea has become reclusive and paranoid. You'll only waste time trying to get him to talk to you.

- Go to the ziggurat in the city center and talk your way into the sanctum of the city's tutelary goddess Bau. Use the [PRAY] command in front of her statue.

- Bau makes you an offer. If you extract affirmations of loyalty from the principal gods of Girsu and Nina, nearby cities subordinate to Lagash in an old alliance, she will change the king's heart so the palace doors open for you. What she DOESN'T tell you is that Ningirsu in Girsu and Nanshe in Nina won't even listen to you until you've secured the blessings of the land's 8 minor gods. Three of these have shrines in Lagash. Another three have their shrines in Girsu, two are in Nina. If you haven't already bought a map from one of the men in red tunics around town, get one for 10 Grain or 4 Medical Herbs before going. The minor gods' shrines will automatically be marked on it.

- This part of Mineruba No Fukurou is open-ended, and it barely gives you any guidance. You've got a lot of work ahead and a lot of ground to cover, and it isn't obvious which quests are mandatory and which are optional. Your main objective is to gather items for your sacrifices to the minor gods. They'll tell you what they want, but you can't get most of their stuff without trading for it in the marketplaces. There's no currency here. The Tin Ingots, Horns, and Feathers you pick up from killing Nomads, Mad Bulls, and Hawks outside the cities can be traded to someone in one of the northwest stalls in Girsu for Dates and Seed Oil, and that will get you started. In general, Slave Contracts are the most valuable and versatile commodity.

- Some of the gods want unique items. You get the Lapis Lazuli Eye Enten asks for by clearing the canal network of Kulilus. (They're tough, be careful.) Bribing or defeating the Palm Tree King to get him out of the royal garden in Girsu nets you the Gold Leaf Headdress Sherida wants. Killing the Bison Beast in the cedar forest and then talking to the King in Nina is how you get the Gold Lyre for Damu. You get the Alabaster Vase Nanja asks for by mending relations between the three priestess sisters found separately in the ziggurats in Lagash, Girsu, and Nina, which just means running back and forth and talking to all of them a few times.

- The easiest way of going about this is to grind until you're about level 15 and can trade for a Bronze Sickle in Nina, and then completing the mandatory Tablet of Destinies quest the familiar-looking priest girl gives you in the library at Girsu. You'll find one piece of the tablet in the mountains to the east, another in the marshes to the south, one in the desert to the southwest. Follow the owl. All the enemies in these places are strong. To get the fourth, trade 8 Slave Contracts or 99 Grain to the merchant in the big house in Lagash. When you complete the tablet, watch the cutscene where the stars disappear as lights blink on in the (unmistakably NYC) skyline across the river.

- Here's why you'll want to do this first. Even when you give the gods what they want, they ask for more of you. You aren't in a position to negotiate. Tell them YES and watch your STR, VIT, STA, and INT stats permanently drop, making fights a lot harder. But when you piece together the Tablet of Destinies and return to the library, the priestess tells you that having the Tablet in your inventory means that when you sacrifice to the gods and earn their favor, they become items in your inventory. You can actually equip them as armor and accessories to compensate for your reduced stats. You can also use and reuse them in battle for curative and damaging elemental effects, but do this VERY sparingly, trust me.

- Once you *finally* have Ningirsu and Nashe in your inventory, return to the ziggurat in Lagash and talk to Bau. Give her everything else she asks for (reducing all your base stats to 1), add her to your inventory, and equip her as your weapon. Head to the palace. King Gudea will invite you to a banquet, and then predictably try to have you killed. When you win a boss fight against his 6 Royal Guards, he'll tell you he doesn't have Lagash's Dream.

- The Dream is in the possession of Enki, the God of Civilization, who dwells deep in the black lake the world floats on top of. Stock up on Medical Herbs before taking the plunge. Go down and down through the lightless waters, fighting or running from Gullas. At the bottom, fight Enki. You can't beat him, so play defensively. Hitting him occasionally can disrupt his attacks. Survive long enough to impress him, and he'll compliment your ingenuity in imitating the gods by making instruments of them, and offers you a proposition. Choose NO and it's game over--so select YES to sell out the three cities' protector gods. When he's done devouring them, Enki gives you the Dream of Lagash and sends you on your way. Re-equip your Bronze Sickle or Cedar Spear. (You get to keep the minor gods for now, though.)

- Follow the sound of the owl back to the surface, and climb up out of the well behind the ziggurat of Lagash. Follow the crazed King Gudea up the stairs to the top. Now that you've taken the city's Dream, the steles on which Lagash's life is written out have turned to clouds, and the city walls evaporate. An Akkadian army masses in the distance. After Gudea throws himself over the edge to his death, the Sky Mother ambushes you. This time you have to kill her. When her color changes, so does her elemental weakness.

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III. AMARNA

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- Get up from the ziggurat's rubble and wander around the abandoned city until you enter more fog. You'll fight weak enemies for a while, and when the fog clears you'll be in a desert. Walk towards the blinding light on the horizon. It's a white city of pylons and obelisks, blazing under the sun.

- Amarna has no wall around it. Enter. You'll notice quickly that the people here are...strange. You'll see why soon enough when the ATEN extends its many hands down from the sky to caress them. Notice how the inhabitants' movement patterns change after the ATEN touches them, and how they say different things if you talk to them then. You can't pry any useful information from them if the ATEN gets to them first. Pay attention to how the ground shimmers where the ATEN is about to shoot down one of its hands. Make sure you're not standing there when it happens, or you'll be thrown into an inescapable and unwinnable fight. You still have the last area's gods with you, and the ATEN won't tolerate that.

- You can visit the temple complex and ransack it for items, but don't bother trying to gain an audience with the king. The priests will string you along with pointless dialogue and fetch quests for hours if you let them.

- Wander the city, visiting storehouses, merchant stalls, tenements, administrative buildings, agricultural plots, manors, and monuments. Your leftover Tin Ingots will go a long way in the marketplace, but try to trade for Papyrus Rolls. They're useful for buying Talismans for spellcasting. (If you've been able to get this far without any, this chapter is where the tougher enemies make them necessary.)

- As long as the ATEN doesn't touch you, you're safe. What you're looking here for appears at random. As you talk to Amarna's people, they'll mention that you're not the first traveler to arrive recently, and tell you what area they saw her in last. As you get closer to finding her, the ATEN shoots its hands down faster and more frequently. Save often!!

- After a long goose chase, someone finally tells you they recently spotted the other newcomer in the aviary next to the temple. Go there. Among the exotic birds and flowering trees, you'll find the purple-haired girl from Catal Huyuk and Lagash. During the cutscene, she tells you that taking the Sky Mother out of play had consequences, and now the ATEN has to go too. She sends you off to find the Tomb City in the desert. After giving you a Jeweled Scarab to open its gate, she disappears.

- Make your way through the desert, fighting War Nomads, Asps, and Jackals. Use the Jeweled Scarab the girl gave you to enter the Tomb City. Go down into the underground labyrinth and search out the mausoleums of the 5 Gods of the Gates and the 7 Guardians of the Secret Portals. This place is gigantic, so you'll be at it while, but the Tomb City has its own townsfolk, merchants, and economy. By the time you're done, you should be at least level 28. Medical Herbs aren't enough anymore, start stocking up on Resin Balm instead. Fighting Skeletal Crocodiles and Tomb Wraiths get you the most EXPs and best bartering items for your time.

- Meet the mummified old gods and the spirits of the guardians. They are willing to aid you against the ATEN, but the new god's power traps them here. After finding the first 4 gods and all 7 guardians, you can talk to Osiris at last. He'll give you the Ivory Box and the Ebony Key, but wants to test you in battle first. When you best him, he automatically uses a last attack that knocks you unconscious. You'll dream of a place that looks *suspiciously* like Grand Central Station in Manhattan, but all the people there are the people from Catal Huyuk, and they're still just as confused about what's going on and where they are.

- When all is said and done, you'll not only get the Ivory Box and Ebony Key, but another Ghost that lets you use the [UNLOCK] command. No doors are closed to you now.

- Return to Amarna. Before entering, the owl reappears and takes the Ebony Key for safekeeping.

- Go to the palace and unlock the doors to the royal chamber. The throne is unoccupied. Sit on it and use the [PRAY] command. The ATEN tears off the roof and plunges its fingers into your chest. Your body changes shape. You are the mighty and serene vicegerent of the eternal ATEN, and must fulfill its command to kill your gods, one by one. The game doesn't tell you, but now you have the Sun Mace in your inventory, so equip it before initiating the first of 8 fights against them. The more you've used their special effects in battle up to this point, the more HPs and attack power they have. When they die, each god becomes a Faith Seed in your inventory.

- You're the divine king now. The Dream of Amarna is your Dream. Your next task is to lead a campaign against an insurgent city to the north and bring it back under the ATEN's sway. When you're victorious, an owl swoops over your chariot during your triumphal procession and drops the Ebony Key at your feet. At the moment of the solar eclipse during your address to the Amarna's citizens, fulfill your promise to Osiris and use the Ebony Key to unlock the old gods in the people's hearts. (If you fail to do so, it's Game Over. )

- Now you have to fight the ATEN. The damage your attacks do is negligible. Just dodge its fireballs, heal when necessary, and let the old gods do the fighting. The ATEN regenerates itself, but the old gods hurt it faster than it can heal. Get a hit in now and then to check the ATEN's life bar. When it's down by at least half, use the Ivory Box to capture and trap its heart and lungs. (You only get one chance, and the ATEN explodes and kills you if you let the gods finish it off.) When it's done, the purple-haired girl appears and tells you the box's key is the Dream of Amarna under the ATEN, but that Dream is changed in you and can no longer open it.

- Amarna's people turn to voices on the wind. A wave of sand crashes over the disintegrating temples and pillars. The corpse of the ATEN shines on in the sky, a spent force, an echo of lost divinity. The reinstated old gods abandon Amarna and forsake you. You are buried as a king without a name or face, but you still hold the Dream of Amarna in the hollow of your chest.

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IV. UGARIT

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- After strolling through a dream of a place that looks like it *might* be Tokyo's Akihabara neighborhood, wake up below deck on a docked ship. It seems some graverobbers pillaged your tomb and brought you and your sarcophagus here to sell off. Sneak off the boat and go into the city.

- The port city of Ugarit is a bazaar of wonders. Too bad you haven't got any silver coins and nobody wants to barter for your other items. Meander through the columnated lanes and courtyard gardens. Enjoy the bridal songs and acrobatic performances in the squares. Listen to the astronomers debating on the palace portico. The courtesans in the brothel will entertain you with poetry recitations...until they realize you can't pay them ;)

- The central temple is closed off for a ceremony, but no doors are closed to you. Use the [UNLOCK] command to go inside and witness a startling child sacrifice to the high god Baal, accompanied by some of the most weirdly beautiful music in the game. When everyone else leaves, speak to Baal's familiar purple-haired high priestess. Baal wants to speak to you, he has a story to tell.

- During the flashback, you play as Baal. The starry Imperial City of the Gods is at war with the Dark City of the underworld, built of obsidian and gilded bone, whose potentate is the infernal god Mot. This part plays more like an RTS than an RPG. Your first objective is to drive back Mot's monstrous army and prevent his siege towers from piercing the firmament below. Keep your head about you and multitask.

- Stage a counterattack. Leave the minarets and emerald domes of the Imperial City and take your army into the underworld to confront Mot. You can cut a swathe through his city's hideous defenders, but don't bother with the garrisons or armories--Mot's power rebuilds them as soon as they're destroyed. Face Mot one on one--he looks oddly like the farmer you killed outside Lagash, doesn't he? In a cutscene, he beats you down and chains you to a boulder before relocating to the Imperial City and leaving you to rot, surrounded by the shades of the dead.

- After sitting in the underworld for a *very* long time, your chains crumble to dust, and you can finally move around. Your task now is to raise a city of ivory and diamond from the ruins. This part plays like a Sim City game. The only way to lose this is by failing to build a Citadel within an hour.

- Now it's your turn to attack the Imperial City of the Gods, which Mot has rebuilt in the likeness of his former capital. Leap up from the pit and smash your new metropolis against his like a wrecking ball.

- The good news is that as Baal, you're level 99 and have maxed out stats. The bad news is that Mot is even stronger, but he apparently got lazy since you last met. His movements are slow and predictable. Eventually you'll wear him down. Watch a cutscene where you batter Mot's skull and devour his flesh and organs, and then fashion your new throne from his still-living bones. Use the ivory and diamond of your underworld city in the restoration of the demolished Imperial City.

- When the flashback ends, Baal asks if you understand. Select NO if you know what's good for you.

- Follow Baal's priestess back to the harbor. She points to the horizon, where a line of black ships appear against the setting sun. The Sea Peoples are coming. Ugarit's walls will be of no help. In 48 hours, the city will be no more, and the ambitions, music, and stories of its people will die with it. There is nothing to be done. She gives you the city's Dream and tells you to escape into the desert.

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V. NIMRUD

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- Regain consciousness in the camp of a merchant caravan on a dusty plain. You're weak, and you lost all your weapons, armor, and curative items. If you leave the site, Horsemen and Raiders will swarm you, and you won't last a minute.

- Look around for the merchant named Nabopolassar. Haggle with him until he trades 500 silver pieces for the Ivory Box containing the ATEN's heart and lungs. Then go to the fat man under the palm tree. Buy an Iron Sword, Iron Armor, Iron Greaves, and an Iron Helm from him. Now you stand a chance out there.

- Fight your way to the walls of Nimrud. Unlock the gates and push through to the ziggurat, beating aside all challengers. Plant the Faith Seeds of Lagash's dead gods in the terraced temple gardens. The gods are yours again, and they're strong. Defeat the Heir Apparent in a duel (he's really easy) and accede to the throne.

- This next section is part RTS, part Sim game. Get to work. Send your armies to massacre the other cities on the plain. The more foes you kill, the more slaves you capture, and the more towns you clear from the map, the more impressive the rewards. Show no mercy ;) Fill your coffers with silver and supervise building projects. Erect new temples and palatial libraries. Subsidize the arts and literature.

- Crush the rebellion. Choosing the most horrible punishments for your captives makes subsequent battles easier. Your city grows resplendent with perfumed gardens. Listen to the music and laughter rising from every street, watch your astronomers charting out the lands of the earth and the provinces of heaven in illuminated maps.

- Besiege the fortified cities far to the south, inhabited by the descendants of the Sea Peoples. Accept no surrenders. The more desolation you create outside of your walls, the brighter your city shines as the crown jewel of the world. The owl tells you that you became the Dream of Nimrud when you traded the ecstasy of the sun for the iron sword of Assyria.

- Pursue and kill the nomads that raided your suburbs. The survivors lead you in a chase along ancient, dust-choked canals. In the nomads' camp, kill the last of them amidst the weeds and piles of bricks that were once a city called Lagash, whose Dream you still carry. Touch the Dream of Lagash in yourself and gain a new Ghost. Now you can use the [CONTEMPLATE] command, but for the time being I don't recommend it because all it does is permanently reduce your STR stat.

- *OPTIONAL BUT RECOMMENDED: look for what's left of the city's outer wall, and follow it around until you find the screen where you killed the farmer for his tunic. There's a single square of grass in the middle. Stand there and use the [CONTEMPLATE] and [PRAY] commands in that order to get the Memory Key.

- As you leave Lagash's ruins, Baal's priestess reappears and thanks you for exterminating the nomads. She despises them, comparing people who don't build cities to bees that don't make honey. When you return in triumph to your enchanting and holy city of Nimrud, notice the owl perched on top of the gates.

- Before you know it, it's all over. One of your vassal cities grew powerful and eclipsed yours in strength. You could not prevent this, and you can't resist the confederacy of rebels it marshalled against you. Your walls come crashing down. Your sacred places burn. The conquering city extracts the agony of your children and converts it to song and abundance. The general who starts a new dynasty after toppling you looks suspiciously like Mot and like the farmer you killed outside Lagash. After he lops off your head and leaves your corpse out in the dust for the vultures, use the [CONTEMPLATE] command at last. The iron Dream of your empire turns to rust in your bones.

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VI. VEII

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- Watch the cutscene of a space shuttle launching. When the smoke clears, you find yourself alive in a strange forested place. Go west. The most common enemies here are Bandits and Wolves. Run away from them. You've got nothing but the tattered white tunic on your back. Your weapons are gone, your gods are lost.

- A wall of stone surrounds the city called Veii. You can unlock the gates at will, but the sentries behind them will push you back. Follow the owl east to the Sanctuary in an oak stand. Witness the people worshipping Baal's high priestess, who they know as the goddess Menrva. She singles you out for her blessing, marking your forehead and earning you the people's wonder and admiration. After she disappears, you can enter the city. Before you leave the Sanctuary, search the underground treasure rooms for a Bronze Axe and a Bronze Cuirass. Equip them.

- Hammers ring in the foundries, and chisels clink in the workshops of this green city of bridges, sculptures, and terracotta tombs. The people here are taciturn. Use the [CONTEMPLATE] command in front of the statues, and they'll telepathically communicate what they're thinking. The satyrs in the market square call you names and recite dirty poetry. The gorgons on the temple's pediment murmur about their slipping trust in Menrva. The nymphs in one of the fountains say that that the vanquishers of Assyria have themselves been subjugated, and an even greater empire now rules over those ancient lands.

- King Rarus welcomes you, and asks you to join the guards escorting a train of pilgrims carrying a sacred object to the Temple of the Twelve Cities to the north. You can't say no. Before setting out, visit the wings of the palace and find that none of the gods' 8 votary idols have anything to say to you.

- When you get separated from the pilgrims, make your way through the woods and back up the hills. Do some exploring, and find weapons, armor, and talismans in the abandoned villages and tombs. Northern Nomads and Barbaric Horsemen are the toughest enemies here.

- You're too late. All the pilgrims and the rest of their guards have been ambushed and killed. The marauding tribesmen gallop away with the gold box containing the sacred object. The mark of Menrva burns on your forehead. No city or settlement will receive you until you recover the box. You are banished from civilization and will soon learn what that means.

- Pursue the raiders into the northeast. Stalk them across their own wild lands. They are a nation, but have no cities to assail. You can only chase them and wipe them out wherever you find them. Brutalize and burn down their camps. Slaughter their animals. Outrage them. Make them search for you. Your Ghosts preserve you. Touch the dead cities' Dreams in your heart as you sleep on the frozen steppe and grow deranged. A new Ghost lets you use the [HALLUCINATE] command.

- At long last, you confront the nomad chieftain at his camp. He'll come at you with all the might of his axe and his exotic gibbering gods, but by now you're too strong for him. Kill him and then kill all the followers of his that haven't fled for EXPs. You'll find the gold box in the chief's tent. Open it to find a little clay statue of the Earth Mother who chased you around Catal Huyuk. The statue grows enormous and changes into the real thing to challenge you...but shatters after taking a single hit. The Earth Mother whispers her dying words to you in a language you no longer understand.

- Menrva's brand fades from your forehead, and your sanity returns. Use the [CONTEMPLATE] command to grapple with the past, then begin the long walk back to Veii, following Menrva's owl.

- Veii's colors and music have dulled. Its statues crumble and their thoughts are garbled. The idols of the 8 gods in the temple have turned into marble blocks. According to their custodian, they are transforming into another city's gods. Only two have faces left. Use the [HALLUCINATE] command in front of them. Watch the harvest goddess Horta distorting into a vision of industrialized farms and food processing plants. The fire and metal god Sethlans morphs into the wheels and belts of manufacturing plants. When either of them asks you to tell them what you see, select NO to initiate a fight with them.

- After defeating Horta and Sethlans, you'll have to make yourself scarce. Meet Menrva at the city gate. She thanks you for annihilating another race of nomadic pests and getting rid of the Earth Mother at last. Man doesn't need any capricious sublime gods of nature, she says. What man creates will become his gods, and since she is the Goddess of War and Wisdom, she will exist forever as she is.

- She offers you the Dream of Veii. Once you accept it, another city's Dream rushes in to fill the void. Watch the cutscene. Veii will be soon be swallowed into a new city, one destined to reach such heights of grandeur that even when it's brought low by barbarians in 700 years, it will retaliate by making citizens of its conquerors.

- Menrva laughs, disappears, and leaves you to the enraged mob of Veii. Tumble through the darkness. Find yourself on the bank of a dark river and watch glowing paper lanterns floating quietly on the water. Acquire a new Ghost that gives you the [MOURN] command.

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VII. CARTHAGE

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- The wings of Menrva's owl blot out the sun and moon, and the hour is midnight in this doomed city by the sea. Get moving. Roman Centurions, Carthaginian Defenders and other soldier-type enemies will chase and swarm you when they're not fighting each other. You can better protect yourself after searching a slain Roman and equipping his Iron Gladius, but steer clear of groups. Weave through the fires and collapsed buildings, searching corpses for items, making your way towards Byrsa on the heights. This is *basically* the final area, so if you're not at least level 55, now's your last chance to grind.

- At the central temple to Baal, the doors are barricaded and it isn't enough to [UNLOCK] them. Baal himself appears and says he's glad you could make it.

- Baal reveals he is Enki, the God of Civilization you met and fought in the black lake beneath the world. After devouring Mot, he became something else: the double-faced deity of glory and atrocity. With each cycle, he grows stronger. The slaughter and misery is forgotten, but the magnificence and power of the victor civilization is not, and each is more marvelous than the last. He is the God of Progress.

- His collaborator Menrva, called Minerva by the victorious invaders, appears beside him. She tells you she's helping Baal because the flowering of art and knowledge in an apex society on the eve of its decline and violent collapse is a more satisfying harvest for a Goddess of War and Wisdom than burnt offerings.

- The Dreams of the fallen cities rebel in you, and you're compelled to fight Baal and Minerva. You can't win. In a cutscene, Minerva restrains you while Baal tears the Dreams from you and throws them upon the pyre the Roman legions have made of his temple, and they burn along with the lost Dream of Carthage. Baal breathes in the smoke of these Dreams and grows even stronger, strong enough to move the axis of history and inscribe a pathway from Carthage in flames to Tenochtitlan, Dresden, and Hiroshima, all burning.

- Baal and Minerva leave you for dead. The Dreams you've collected turn to ash. Use the [MOURN] command, and the ashes becomes the Memory of Dreams. Take it.

- Carthage is dead, and the Romans eradicate what's left. There's too many of them to fight. Escape by pushing through to the harbor and jumping into the ocean, where you'll be caught by the Sea Mother. She has no interest fighting you, thankfully. During the cutscene, she tells you she is the last survivor of the Primordial Gods, and has escaped death by staying uninvolved and out of sight--but her day will come. In the meantime, she agrees to carry you home. Before you go, she gives you the Zurvan Sword and warns you about Minerva.

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VIII. CATAL HUYUK (REVISITED)

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- The mists have lifted. The people of Catal Huyuk know themselves now. They're what's left of the smoke that rose from the Dreams and was blown away to vanish into time. They are the womb-memories of all people in all cities. Dreams nobody alive will dream for 9000 years sustain their ephemeral city of forever. It is here in this ambiguous fantasy of civilization's dawn and the last sunset of human innocence that you must inter the Memory of Dreams.

- Find and speak to the Matriarch and Patriarch. They remember you now. You were a ghost-person of Catal Huyuk who Minerva, corrupt sister of the Primordial Mothers, sent to the year 1999 to collect a piece of the Dream of the New Millennium and take it back to Catal Huyuk to ensure the past contained the future. The Matriarch tells you Catal Huyuk is a dream of Tokyo and New York. The Patriarch says Catal Huyuk dreams of Tokyo and New York. The paradox ensured that Baal couldn't take either of those Dreams from you. He doesn't know you survived.

- After burying the ashes and using the [MOURN] command, you are given two options: listen to the Ghosts and take the Dusk Talisman, or listen to the Dreams and take the Dawn Talisman. The first gives you the best defensive spell for the last two boss fights, the other gives you the strongest attack spell. If you want the best ending, *DO NEITHER*.

- Instead, find the room where you met Minerva during your first visit. There's a door there now. If you got the Memory Key, use it to enter the Developers Room and talk to the team that made Mineruba No Fukurou, represented by various NPC and enemy graphics from throughout the game. In the back, talk to the writer and director, Akira Yamagata, who looks exactly like the farmer outside Lagash. He has a *lot* to say, but it's interesting...and rather sad. He's worried about how the game turned out, and that he and his team didn't have enough time to get it right. He mentions his cancer diagnosis and says he's afraid Mineruba no Fukurou will be his last and only game. And he tries to explain what he was trying to do with it. **REDACTED** He also gives his personal e-mail address, but it doesn't work now :(

*UPDATE #1: Stop e-mailing me about EnRPG mistranslating or censoring what he said about the A-bomb. I don't know anything about it. Take it up with them, let me know what they say.

**UPDATE #2: Look...I don't know. *Was* Yamagata being ironic? I obviously don't know him, so maybe? But if we hadn't won WW2, would this game have been made? Would the the PC-98 have been invented? Would there even be an Internet and would you be reading this on GameFAQs.com and e-mailing me about it? I don't need the grief so fine, I'm cutting that part out. Play the game and make up your own mind.

- When he finishes talking, Yamagata gives you the Noon Talisman. It does...nothing ;)

- When you have one of the three talismans in your inventory, you can leave Catal Huyuk.

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IX. BYZANTIUM

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- Follow the sound of beating wings west over the plains toward a cloud of frankincense and shimmering porphyry in the outline of the ATEN(?!). The besieged city is already a depopulated shell of what it used to be. Talk to the people, watch the cutscene, fight Minerva's Owl. It changes forms three times, growing larger and easier to hit, but compensating with attacks that are a lot harder to dodge.

- The owl gets impatient, and then seizes and drops you outside of the city's fortifications, the most formidable walls ever built. The army standing ready to crush the last bastion of the people who call themselves Romans stands back and watches while you have your rematch with Baal and Minerva. It's an endurance contest. Focus your attacks on Baal--the Zurvan Sword hurts him, but not Minerva. (Even though the game tells you you're dealing damage, she has infinite HPs.)

- When Baal falls, Minerva transports you to a basilica cannon of Ottoman bronze. Your sword turns to a burning torch. The Sea Mother betrayed you. Minerva asks if you will ignite the powder and fire the cannon. The besieging army awaits your decision.

- "It's only another massacre," Minerva tells you. Another step up on the stair towards the Millennium. A keystone in the foundation of your science and technology, your art and literature, your airplanes and satellites. The genius and joys of the globe-spanning civilization you know cannot begin to be born unless this last vestige of antiquity dies. "What's one more massacre? Would you rather murder your world in its crib?"

- Will you fire the cannon?

- Select YES. This can go one of three ways.

- If you took the Dusk Talisman, you light the cannon and blast a section of the wall apart. Then you're transported into the city to aid its defenders in an unwinnable fight against the infinitely spawning invaders. If you last long enough, the screen slowly fades to black while you're still playing. The ending is a rather dry scrolling history lecture about how Columbus probably wouldn't have discovered America without the Ottoman conquest.

- If you took the Dawn Talisman, you light the cannon and then storm through the breach in the wall with the attackers. The game ends when you find and kill the emperor, who's fighting alongside his soldiers and looks like the farmer from Lagash. He's easy. Fade to black, history lecture.

- If you have the Noon Talisman, you're taken back to the shining neon city from the start of the game. Minerva is there too, fading away and cursing you. You helped her to create a Millennium of open communication and collaboration between peoples, where a new global consciousness creates prosperity and a durable peace. The new century's wisdom to not repeat the mistakes of the past starves her out and makes her obsolete. Humanity can chart its own destiny now, and its grand new Dream will guide it to the stars. All is as it should be.

- I don't know what happens if you select NO.

Unpublished work Copyright 1999-2000 Michael Lanquist1

1

I’ve had this sitting around for a while. I don’t know how I got it into my head to try writing a story about Çatalhöyük, Byzantium, and the End of History in the form of an old walkthrough for a JRPG that never existed, authored by a person who never existed, but it was a fun experiment. Not sure if it’s a successful one, but it’s done collecting virtual dust on my hard drive.

I used an AI-generated image at the top, and I promise I feel like an asshole about it. It’s a safe bet that the Japanese lettering is gibberish.

I was lying about GameFAQs pages disappearing—but if I was going to pretend that this was an actual video game guide, I needed some pretense to “reproduce” it here. Call it part of the story.

Read the original on bananapeel.substack.com

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