We need to talk
It's not you, it's me. But also, it's you.
The Distractionist
A newsletter for questionable geniuses
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Vicious little bastards
And I wrote that all by myself
Happy little hate dance
And a solid plan for the future
Why you've got ADHD
All of you, except for Wonko
Basic dinosaur stuff
And some weeping
Three glorious minutes
Is all you're gonna get
Not fit for purpose
Pretty much everything, including me
Dirty, sweaty caverns of despair
And why I like them
You snivelling little worms
And other terms of endearment
Ugliness, unpopularity, and failure
But it's okay, it's only in this timeline
How much smack can I get for this time machine?
And other awkward questions
Funny little things
On being a dunce and/or a genius
Great Cosmatic Mother!
Cave sex, drugs, and a deeply misunderstood artist (me)
A cave of one's own
Just call me Virginia Wolf
Signs of madness
I may be ticking all the boxes
Mental failure
We built this city in multiple dimensions
At last, a purpose to my existence
I was worried there for a bit
Spirals of time
It's my birthday and I'll collapse into a puddle of self-doubt in Sainsburys if I want to
I'm just a scumbag with a shit bike, scaramoosh
A Bohemian rhapsody in Rhyl
Some kind of hippy shit
Accidents, things I did on purpose, bin karma