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I attended a networking event, and I challenged myself to speak to 5 people without asking the question:

“What do you do for a living?”

Impossible. Right?

This question has become the war cry of professionals at networking events all around the world.

The thing is, it’s not a bad question.

The problem is that most people have uninteresting jobs to the point that they themselves don’t like talking about them.

Picture this:

“So what do you do for a living?”

“I’m a consultant who works with AI-focused enterprises to enhance their workflow to optimize their long-term strategy.”

“hmm, okay, I think I’m just going to go get some nibbles.”

Most people have boring jobs (Sorry consultants), and this question does not lead us to having deep and meaningful connections with people.

At a networking event, your role is not to weigh people up if they are useful to you.

Your goal should be to be a professional best friend.

Because who doesn’t want to help their best friend 😉

My challenge to myself was to avoid this question and to see if I could still have a conversation.

I did, and I was shocked at what types of conversations I had:

I spoke to a Project Manager who talked about her family
A CEO talked about his passion for sailing
An accountant discussed their Pokémon card collection
A salesman shared their passion for drinking wine and watching Netflix (MY Man!)

I was able to have much better conversations when I removed the question “What do you do for a living?” Instead, I asked:

“What do you do when you’re NOT working?”

This is a great question because most people HAVE to work.

But how you spend your free time is a choice, something you WANT to do.

But what I found surprising is that people’s answers included what they did for a living.

“Well, when I am not doing accountancy, I spend most of my time on eBay looking up Pokémon cards.”
“99% of my free time is running my business, but I love sailing, that’s my happy place.”
“Murder documentaries and drinking wine, it helps me cope with sales.” (I should check up on this guy)

I left that event making deeper connections and more business cards than ever.

All because I challenged myself to NOT ask a question.

If you want to develop charisma to have conversations effortlessly, then you know where I am. Book a discovery call with me:

People I work with leave each session with:

Until next time,

Speak to you next week

Kind regards

I Went to a Networking Event and Banned the Most Basic Question Ever