_042: deciding on a new journey
i set off on a new adventure today! ✨
i stepped into the unova region once again this evening (after watching/listening to oodles of videos to "convince" me that it was okay to do so, that it was the "optimal choice", until I realised that that was a load of BS and I'd just wasted an hour).
this process, which I undertook over the day's course, reminded me that I can spend an awful lot of time hung up over and deliberating A Single Choice, without ever Actually Acting On It.
that I'm extremely good at trying to Think My Way Out Of My Problems as opposed to Acting My Way Out Of Them.
and that's... largely why I struggle with them on a repeated basis.
so tonight is a little reflection. yes, I had some lovely moments today. yes, I billed an invoice, and made pizza with my brother and his girlfriend, and watched some nostalgic Pokémon Origins with them. but I also spent hours deliberating over something instead of Actually Just Playing It. Again.
so let this be a reminder to future me, or a sign to any reader in a similar prospective state of deliberative purgatory. just do the goddamn thing for a solid 30 minutes. then you can re-evaluate and determined whether it's for you right now.
trust me. because i'm an expert at the alternative option, and let me tell you, it gets you absolutely nowhere fast. or... at all.
so just give the damned thing at least a 30min chance :)
~ juni
links for 23/03/25:
stop putting unfair pressure on yourself, and your free time. if you want to play a game, just boot anything up. there is not a Wrong Choice. it's getting the You Time that matters.
A Lot is changing. And so any opportunity you get, to refill and recharge, you should go for.
- make your gaming space comfortable, surround yourself with the little things you have that make you feel happy and at peace.
- retro achievements - integrated into retroarch emulator
- dedicate time for gaming whilst disconnected from social media and your phone, like the days of old ~
- find a few others to talk to that share a cosy niche of your interests. but remember - quality over quantity 🥰
A few days ago, I finished The War of Art by Steven Pressfield, and two excerpts moved me: If you didn’t love the project that is terrifying you, you wouldn’t feel anything. The opposite of love isn’t hate; it’s indifference... the more fear we feel about a specific enterprise, the more certain we can be that that enterprise is important to us. I have big plans for the rest of 2025. I want to post more art, create a personal website, write more – grand ideas that I want to share. But more than anything, I want to approach life like a game, not one of aimless fun, but one of perpetual exploration, experimentation, and venturing into uncharted waters despite the looming anxiety. It will always be there anyway, won’t it?
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