I write this still shivering from my first London outdoor swim of the year. The Hampstead mixed pond was gloriously empty. Twelve degrees the sign read and the sun was out, It felt like it should be warm? I pulled on my long sleeve swim suit and my goggles as I had ambition to do some ‘real’ swimming, to actually use this as an exercise opportunity.
But I got in the water and it was cold. Like pull all the breath from your body cold. Afterwards my swimming companion told me that I looked hilarious flailing around with my goggles on, and I spent the whole five minutes I was in the water shouting ( it seems I am unable to speak at a moderate volume when my body is going into shock) - WOW IT’S SO NICE. LOOK THERE’S THE HERON. I SWIM REALLY FAST JUST SO I CAN WARM UP. IT REALLY IS QUITE COLD ISN’T IT BUT NICE SO NICE…
One quick lap, one head dunk, two cups of coffee later, here I am. Off my face on caffeine. The football season has stopped and I am bereft. Wednesday and Saturday training are little oases in my week, where I get to be someone else. No longer a mother or a wife or even a friend, just me, in my body, kicking ball. I always leave training feeling lighter and clear headed. But this week I am appreciating not being crazy busy. I am reading a brilliant book, Patrick Freyne - Experts In A Dying Field.. about a Dublin band mired in tragedy.. it’s very funny, in an understated Irish way, and the humour makes me miss home. It’s out in June, you can pre-order it here.
Another thing that makes me miss home at the moment is this song that I have become mildly obsessed with by the Dublin folk artist John Francis Flynn. It’s called ’Come My Little Son’ and is written from the perspective of a mother speaking to her son at bedtime telling him why he doesn’t see his Dad.
Spoiler Alert - His Da works building motorways in England. I don’t know whether it’s because I am a mother of sons or because I have my own experience of my dad working in England when I was a child, but the song, whenever I hear it, never fails to make me bawl. It was written for Luke Kelly by Ewan MacColl, Father of Kirsty and writer of a remarkable amount of excellent songs including the Pogues classic Dirty Old Town. It’s also responsible for making me pick up my guitar again. ( the chords to the song are pretty straight forward ) I realised, as I was chopping my nails down so they could form the chords on the fretboard properly, that my guitar playing is seasonal. Something about the sunshine brings it out.
I like to observe how Spring and the arrival of sunshine can change me. The garden has erupted into colour. The flowers, and the cherry trees in the park bring me a sort of deep bassline of joy that sticks around all day. Here are my current garden highlights…
So I ogle the flowers. I play my guitar. I listen to the birds. And when I leave the house on a sunny morning, and walk down the road feeling the warmth on my face, the world feels filled with possibility. What is this ridiculous optimism? How does it work? It reminds me of this quote from Morgan Jones
“I like to think I lead a complex emotional life but then the sun comes out and I am happy. I am functionally no different from a big leaf.”
We are all just big leaves guys. What a peaceful thought. How are you getting on with Spring? Will you let me know in the comments? Are you changed? is there anything you’re doing different? xx
Okay things I have to tell you.
Firstly, for you, subscribers of Changes I am holding a scheduled chat next Tuesday evening 28 April at 9pm. It has been decided in our chat section here - that this chat will be around the subject of our writing. It’s a place to share questions, frustrations, advice on methods and processes, to talk about how we fit it in, how we manage our writing on Substack.. there’s actually so much to talk about we may need several of these but lets start the ball rolling next Tuesday night. All you need is to go to the chat section of your phone or desktop (the little chat box icon) and join in. I like doing it on my desktop as I can type faster..
I have loved being a judge on The Women’s Prize this year. The Women’s Prize shortlist was announced this week. Here we are after a day thrashing it out in the judging room, getting sixteen books down to six…
The six shortlisted books are,
-Flashlight by Susan Choi (Jonathan Cape, Vintage, Penguin Random House UK)
-Dominion by Addie E. Citchens (Europa Editions UK)
-The Correspondent by Virginia Evans (Michael Joseph, Penguin Random House UK)
-The Mercy Step by Marcia Hutchinson (Cassava Republic Press)
-Kingfisher by Rozie Kelly (Saraband)
-Heart the Lover by Lily King (Canongate)
You can learn more about the books here. In this list there are four American writers, four debut novelists and four independent publishers. They are all brilliant. World class. Excellent. They are all books I will be pushing to my friends, demanding they read them so we can discuss. I met a few of the short and long-listed authors last night at the Women’s Prize party and it was so heartwarming to hear how being listed for the prize has already made a difference to their writing lives. And the winning author, will receive a prize of £30,000! This happens in June. For now, go forth and read and let me know in the Chat section how you are getting on..
I have guested on Pandora Sykes Books And Bits Substack this week, giving my cultural recommendations. There’s a lot in there; books, music, comedians, films, podcasts, a new favourite dessert and my favourite New Yorker long reads… some of it is behind a paywall but if you want to go and take a look it’s here
This weeks Changes interview comes from Frances Ryan, an award winning journalist and reporter ( for the Guardian mainly) and a long standing disability rights activist. Frances has a been a wheel chair user all her life and has written a book called
Who Wants Normal? Life Lessons From Disabled Women.
Her book is deeply personal but also brilliantly informative about the reality of what it is to be disabled in Britain today. I loved her answers to the six change questions.. I found it especially interesting learning about how the limitations of a physical environment can affect you psychologically.
‘We rarely consider, I think, how physical change can lead to emotional change or the way in which an inaccessible environment - from train stations, the local pub, to our own homes - naturally takes a psychological toll on many disabled people. A ramp can create freedom, a bathroom dignity, smart blinds control. That’s something we should all have access to.’
The whole interview is up and I’d love you to read it and share if you like it. x
John Francis Flynn performed at my latest London Irish Literary Salon, where our book guest was Katriona S’Sullivan. Katriona wrote Poor which was on the Dublin top ten bestsellers lists for about three years?!?! and has now just released a follow up to Poor entitled Hungry - a Biography Of My Body. It’s part manifesto, part memoir, looking at her life through the lens of her body and body image. I’ve no doubt it will sell hugely again as Katriona has an amazing ability to cut through the bull shit, strip away the shame, and lay her truth out on the table for all to see. You could see the emotion she evoked in the room last week, there were many tears..
I’m doing another literary salon in June.. this time with two excellent Irish writers of literary fiction, Wendy Erskine (author of The Benefactors which is longlisted for the Women’s Prize this year) and Eimear McBride whose debut novel A Girl Is A Half Formed Thing won the Womens Prize For Fiction back in 2014 and whose fourth novel The City Changes It’s Face came out last year. Music will be provided by Joshua Burnside. You can get your tickets here.
Will be in touch xx
Comments
Nothing yet. Say the first thing.
Sign in to join the conversation.