Leave My Anxiety Alone

Well, hello.

Yesterday I talked with three different women who were feeling anxiety. One mom at grocery store. One mom at the soccer fields. One mom online via voice text.

Each one—anxiety.

Oh, did I mention my anxiety? I guess that would be four then. I mostly feel mine between 3-4:00am. It’s lovely (please sense the sarcasm).

Here is the thing with anxiety. We want it gone, but we don’t actually want to deal with it.

This is true for any difficult feeling. Trust me, I just released a book on feelings and just mentioning the word, "“feelings,” strikes up resistance in hearts as fast as a bottle rocket on the 4th of July.

We want freedom from a hard feeling, but we don’t want to do what is necessary to get it.

We don’t want anyone to touch our anxiety. Touching it is scary. Dealing with it increases our fear. So we keep it at arms length doing desperate little things to try and manage it.

But, it remains.

So the question is simple. Do you really want help?

If so, then you have to look at your anxiety with sober eyes. You might even have to let others touch it as well.

For me, that means letting my anxiety breathe in daylight hours.

Here is a podcast episode I sent out several times this week. It is the best thing I’ve heard on anxiety and I hope it helps you too.

I’d like to offer you the liturgy from my book Feel as well—

Breathe in—Jesus, help me . . . Breathe out—enter into Your love.

I feel anxious.
For a moment, I let myself feel.

Search my heart, O God.
What are You inviting me to feel beneath my anxiety?

Whatever feeling I need to feel today and from my past, I allow myself to feel now.

I feel ________ (anger, sadness, grief, fear, disgust, etc.).

Help me, God, to be kind to myself as I enter and feel all that remains unfelt in my soul and story.

God, this anxiety takes me on a journey that is rather painful, mysterious, and unknown to me.

Please, God, attend to my pain.
Please, in Your compassion, attend to my heart.

Please, make space for my soul to be seen.

With You, I don’t have to manage or fix my anxiety, or make it stop. With You, I don’t have to navigate it, avoid it, or dodge it. With You, I can be real about all that is good, hard, and still hurt- ing within me.

May this anxiety be what reminds my heart to pay attention to what is really going on in the deep waters of my soul. As I enter in, I make space to let my feelings flow. May I find You healing all the pain that I never allowed to be felt before.

I will walk inward and onward, knowing that You, my Father, are not only with me, but leading me into the hidden places in my heart.

I lean on You. I limp on You. I love You and I am loved by You.

My God and my Savior, Amen.

ORDER FEEL HERE. 75 Liturgies. One for every feeling.

May you have courage to touch your anxiety today.

Thank you for letting me take up room in your inbox.

Stay awake to love.